Sam Vimes Quotes

Shut up sergeant. You're a free troll. That's an order
Sam Vimes ~ Terry Pratchett

Well, the news has got around. The Duchess of Keepsake has invited us to a ball, Sir Henry and Lady Withering have invited us to a ball, and Lord and Lady Hangfinger have invited us to ... yes, a ball."
"Well, that's a lot of ... "
"Don't you dare, Sam. ~ Terry Pratchett

Sam Vimes could parallel process. Most husbands can. They learn to follow their own line of thought while at the same time listening to what their wives say. And the listening is important, because at any time they could be challenged and must be ready to quote the last sentence in full. A vital additional skill is being able to scan the dialogue for telltale phrases such as "and they can deliver it tomorrow" or "so I've invited them for dinner?" or "they can do it in blue, really quite cheaply. ~ Terry Pratchett

The plain old Sam Vimes had fought back. He got rid of most of the plumes and the stupid tights, and ended up with a dress uniform that at least looked as though its owner was male. But the helmet had gold decoration, and the bespoke armourers had made a new, gleaming breastplate with useless gold ornamentation on it. Sam Vimes felt like a class traitor every time he wore it. He hated being thought of as one of those people that wore stupid ornamental armour. It was gilt by association. ~ Terry Pratchett

A Duke couldn't have the arse hanging out of his trousers when meeting foreign diplomats. Actually even plain old Sam Vimes never had the arse hanging out of his trousers, either, but no one would have actually started a war if he had. ~ Terry Pratchett

Fortune favours the brave, sir," said Carrot cheerfully.

"Good. Good. Pleased to hear it, captain. What is her position vis a vis heavily armed, well prepared and excessively manned armies?"

"Oh, no–one's ever heard of Fortune favouring them, sir."

"According to General Tacticus, it's because they favour themselves," said Vimes. He opened the battered book. Bits of paper and string indicated his many bookmarks. "In fact, men, the general has this to say about ensuring against defeat when outnumbered, out–weaponed and outpositioned. It is..." he turned the page, "'Don't Have a Battle. ~ Terry Pratchett

There's lots of people will help you with alcohol business, but there's no one out there arranging little meetings where you can stand up and say, 'My name is Sam Vimes and I'm a really suspicious bastard. ~ Terry Pratchett

I'm not a natural killer! See this? See what it says? I'm supposed to keep the peace, I am! If I kill people to do it, I'm reading the wrong manual! ~ Terry Pratchett

I assure you I will not kill you," said Inigo.
"I know that," said Vimes. "But will you try? ~ Terry Pratchett

But the helmet had gold decoration, and the bespoke armorers had made a new gleaming breastplate with useless gold ornamentation on it. Sam Vimes felt like a class traitor every time he wore it. He hated being thought of as one of those people that wore stupid ornamental armor. It was gilt by association. ~ Terry Pratchett

History was full of the bones of good men who'd followed bad orders in the hope that they could soften the blow. Oh, yes, there were worse things they could do, but most of them began right where they started following bad orders. ~ Terry Pratchett

What's the orbital velocity of the moon? ~ Terry Pratchett

Sam Vimes, I've dreamed of visiting Koom Valley all my life, so don't you think for one moment you're gallivanting off to see it and leave me at home!" "I don't gallivant! I've never gallivanted. I don't know how to vant! I don't even have a galli! But there's going to be a war there soon!" "Then I shall tell them we're not involved!" said Sybil calmly. "That won't work!" "Then it won't work in Ankh-Morpork, either," said Sybil, ~ Terry Pratchett

Cheery was aware that Commander Vimes didn't like the phrase 'The innocent have nothing to fear', believing the innocent had everything to fear, mostly from the guilty but in the longer term even more from those who say things like 'The innocent have nothing to fear'. ~ Terry Pratchett

N matter how stressed Claire became, the tropical trees and exotic island flowers decorating the lobby always managed to take her breath away and put her mind at ease. Nature had always been a good de-stressor for her coming in close behind having her hand held by Mr. Sam Stewart ~ Carolyn Gibbs

Criticizing a person's ideas about God and the afterlife is thought to be impolitic in a way that criticizing his ideas about physics or history is not. ~ Sam Harris

Whatever you want to do - start now. No one needs to give you permission. No one needs to invite you to the table. Just ~ Sam Maggs

Robert Trivers argues, for instance, that people who can believe their own lies turn out to be the best liars of all - and an ability to deceive rivals has obvious advantages in the state of nature. ~ Sam Harris

It is not merely that we are at war with an otherwise peaceful religion that has been "hijacked" by extremists. We are at war with precisely the vision of life that is prescribed to all Muslims in the Koran, and further elaborated in the literature of the hadith, which recounts the sayings and actions of the Prophet. ~ Sam Harris

I was 90% certain Thia was the best therapist money could buy; the remaining 10%, I still questioned if she was certifiable. ~ Genna Rulon

A good scientist must accept the challenge that one day everything he believes could be wrong. ~ Sam Hawksmoor

When considering the truth of a proposition, one is either engaged in an honest appraisal of the evidence and logical arguments, or one isn't. Religion is one area of our lives where people imagine that some other standard of intellectual integrity applies. ~ Sam Harris

The paradox is that we can become wiser and more compassionate and live more fulfilling lives by refusing to be who we have tended to be in the past. But we must also relax, accepting things as they are in the present, as we strive to change ourselves. ~ Sam Harris

Oh, Sam. Sam, Sam, Sam. You know nothing about dragons, do you? Wow. How the hell are we your destiny? You poor, poor sexy man-child. I feel bad for you. And slightly aroused. But mostly bad. And aroused. ~ T.J. Klune

Vimes shook his head. "That always chews me up," he said. "People killing one another just because their gods have squabbled - " "Oh, they've got the same god, sir. Apparently it's over a word in their holy book, sir. The Elharibians say it translates as 'god' and the Smalies say it's 'man.'" "How can you mix them up?" "Well, there's only one tiny dot difference in the script, you see. And some people reckon it's only a bit of fly dirt in any case." "Centuries of war because a fly crapped in the wrong place?" "It could have been worse," said Carrot. "If it had been slightly to the left the word would have been 'liquorice. ~ Terry Pratchett

We must do everything we can to be more aggressive in confronting Syria about what they are doing in Iraq. ~ Sam Brownback

When the concept of Social Security came before the House, every Republican but one voted against it. Had it not been for the Democrats, Social Security would never have passed, and our older people would not have this great support that our people provide. It has been my experience that Democrats generally vote to protect the people, while Republicans seem to try to protect the interests of big business. ~ Sam Rayburn

Sam Turton is the true embodiment of the responsible artist. The honesty and integrity of the man comes out with every soulful note he sings. ~ Andrew Craig

Later, you should learn to hire fast and scale up the company, but in the early days the goal should be not to hire. Not to hire. ~ Sam Altman

My mum has lived in Australia for 22 years now, and we have a rocky relationship. But at the same time it's one I want to maintain. I need her to be my mum. The relationship took a lot of rebuilding. ~ Sam Taylor-Wood

I simply define glory as the beauty of God unveiled. Glory is the resplendent radiance of His power and His personality. Glory is all of God that makes God God, and shows Him to be worthy of our praise and our boasting and our trust and our hope and our confidence and our joy. ~ Sam Storms

You really like putting it all on display, don't you? No editing."
"I'm not playing games with you, Sam. I have no intention of hiding what I want; I won't make that mistake again. ~ Genna Rulon

Participating in the process is important as celebrating the victory. ~ Anyaele Sam Chiyson

Set a clear, easy-to-understand vision for your company, and make it be a mission people believe in. ~ Sam Altman

Sorry, there's nothing like a screaming baby to make a mother twitch. ~ Sam Taylor-Wood

Or an amicable pair," said Sam. "Sorry?" "In math, that's what we call two numbers each of which is equal to the sum of the divisors of the other. The smallest ones, 220 and 284, were regarded by the Pythagoreans as symbols of true friendship. ~ Reginald Hill

If you kick it, they shall come. ~ Sam Hyde

God does not reveal information by communication: He reveals Himself by communion. Revelation is a personal meeting of God with man. It is a meeting of mind with mind or person with person. ~ Sam Storms

Sam just told me to tell you that the most important thing
is to not do what you did to them on the episode."
"That won't happen," I replied, "because I doubt they'll
leave the keys in the car again. Wish me luck. ~ Maggie Stiefvater

Writing for the theatre is so different to writing for anything else. Because what you write is eventually going to be spoken. That's why I think so many really powerful novelists can't write a play - because they don't understand that it's spoken - that it hits the air. They don't get that. ~ Sam Shepard

I've only been in unrequited relationships where people haven't loved me back. I guess I'm a little bit attracted to that in a bad way. ~ Sam Smith

The ordinances do not impart eternal life to the believer, but they do confirm, strengthen, and heighten our awareness and enjoyment of that life. The bread and wine are means or instruments by which God quickens us to apprehend, understand, visualize, and experience the sanctifying influence of the Holy Spirit and his unique ministry of shining the light of illumination and glory on Jesus. ~ Sam Storms

Toby: All right. It couldn't have gone far, right?
Sam: No.
Toby: Somewhere in this building ... is our talent. ~ Aaron Sorkin

There is no shortage of evidence that when we support the fundamental freedoms of women and girls, they are able to realize their full potential to engage in, contribute to and benefit from sustainable development. In doing so, we will all reap the benefits; in our homes, throughout our communities, and across our nations. ~ Sam Kutesa

Nobody's good. I hate it. I truly hate it. I mean, there's a lot of guys doing stuff I admire, but stand-up-wise I feel very alone. I really miss Bill Hicks. I wish I could have put him on my show. And I really miss Sam Kinison a lot. Richard Pryor's sick ... It's like you get here and then, oh wait a minute, there's nobody here any more. I feel like the guy who finally got into Studio 54, three years too late, Duh, where are all the famous people? ~ Chris Rock

My friend lost his mother when we were at college. I spent a lot of nights talking with him. Lot of nights." He pauses. "I know what it's like. You don't just get over it. And it doesn't make any difference if you're supposedly a "grown-up". And it never goes away, ~ Sophie Kinsella

Sometimes I think that all anyone needs in life is lots of popcorn and a few Lovelies ~ Sam Savage

Sam stood in the middle of the store. With a spear of brilliant light in hand and wearing a suit of chain mail with a helmet over her green hijab, she looked drop-dead dangerous. If our religion didn't forbid it, I would have kissed her.
"Let him go." Sam's voice radiated Valkyrie power. "Amir belongs to me."
My heart swelled with pride. I felt like we could take on the whole world together, and -
"Not anymore," Stan snarled. "As long as he wears the nábrók, he is bound to me."
Oh. ~ Rick Riordan

Good men and good women have fire in the belly. We are fierce. Don't mess with us if you're looking for someone who will always be 'nice' to you. Nice gets you a C+ in life. We don't always smile, talk in a soft voice, or engage in indiscriminate hugs. In the loving struggle between the sexes we thrust and parry. ~ Sam Keen

A woman's place is in the home. Why should she go out and take away a workingman's pay instead of staying home and stealing out of his jacket like a good wife. ~ Sam Levenson

The biggest PR hack you can do, is not hire a PR firm. ~ Sam Altman

As a musician myself, it annoys the hell out of me to watch an actor trying to play a guitar out of time with the music. ~ Sam Palladio

To say that I would have done otherwise had I wanted to is simply to say that I would have lived in a different universe had I been in a different universe. ~ Sam Harris

Vimes had believed all his life that the Watch were called coppers because they carried copper badges, but no, said Carrot, it comes from the old word cappere, to capture. ~ Terry Pratchett

You think I hate men. I guess I do, although some of my best friends...I don't like this position. I mistrust generalized hatred. I feel like one of those twelfth century monks raving on about how evil women are and how they must cover themselves up completely when they go out lest they lead men into evil thoughts. The assumption that the men are the ones who matter, and that the women exist only in relation to them, is so silent and underrunning that ever we never picked it up until recently. But after all, look at what we read. I read Schopenhauer and Nietzsche and Wittgenstein and Freud and Erikson; I read de Montherlant and Joyce and Lawrence and sillier people like Miller and Mailer and Roth and Philip Wylie. I read the Bible and Greek myths and didn't question why all later redactions relegated Gaea-Tellus and Lilith to a footnote and made Saturn the creator of the world. I read or read about, without much question, the Hindus and the Jews, Pythagoras and Aristotle, Seneca, Cato, St.Paul, Luther, Sam Johnson, Rousseau, Swift...well, you understand. For years I didn't take it personally.
So now it is difficult for me to call others bigots when I am one myself. I tell people at once, to warn them, that I suffer from deformation of character. But the truth is I am sick unto death of four thousand years of males telling me how rotten my sex is. Especially it makes me sick when I look around and see such rotten men and such magnificent women, all of whom have a sneaking ~ Marilyn French

Why couldn't it have been done 2 years ago, and why will 2 years in the future be too late? ~ Sam Altman

You're buying the next one," he said. "The man drinking shouldn't consume more than the man paying. It offends Silf. ~ Sam Sykes

Every actor fears unemployment - even me. ~ Sam Worthington

Sam handed back the sword. "When I try to swat a bug, it always flies away. All I do is slap my arm. It stings." That made Jon laugh. ~ George R R Martin

I can hear the bunny all the time now. Even when I'm outside, under my tree.
I'm mad at the bunny for being sick and bothering me.
For being...alive. ~ Sam Kieth

If you have an eye for a reward in December,award yourself in April! ~ Anyaele Sam Chiyson