Rear End Quotes

I judge a woman and a horse by the same criteria: legs, head and rear end. ~ Elizabeth Arden

Maybe its not necessarily a dead-end job; maybe more along the lines of a rear-end one. ~ Johnnie Dent Jr.

He took another steps backward, right into the horse of the Cokyrian soldier we had avoided earlier, bouncing off to land gracelessly upon the ground on his rear end. He stared up at the woman, making no attempt to stand.
"Your horse is very solid," he slurred. "Congratultions on having such a fine mount. ~ Cayla Kluver

My rear end was blood-raw from my so called brilliant ideas rebounding on me. ~ Malorie Blackman

The rock came loose, but Jake's satisfied grunt turned into a howl of outraged pain as a set of huge teeth in the next stall clamped into Jake's ample rear end. "You vicious bag of bones," he shouted, jumping to his feet and throwing himself half over the rail in an attempt to land a punch on Attila's body. As if the horse anticipated retribution, he sidled to the edge of his stall and regarded Jake from the corner of his eye with an expression that looked to Jake like complacent satisfaction. "I'll get you for that," Jake promised, and he started to shake his fist when he realized how absurd it was to threaten a dumb beast.
Rubbing his offended backside, he turned to Mayhem and carefully put his own rump against the outside wall of the barn. He checked the hoof to make certain it was clean, but the moment his fingers touched the place where the rock had been lodged the chestnut jerked in pain. "Bruised you, did it?" Jake said sympathetically. "It's not surprisin', considering the size and shape of the rock. But you never gave a sign yesterday that you were hurtin'," he continued. Raising his voice and infusing it with a wealth of exaggerated admiration, the patted the chestnut's flank and glanced disdainfully at Attila while he spoke to Mayhem. "That's because you're a true aristocrat and a fine, brave animal-not a miserable, sneaky mule who's not fit to be your stallmate!"
If Attila cared one way or another for Jake's opinion, he was disappointingly careful not to ~ Judith McNaught

Man is flying too fast for a world that is round. Soon he will catch up with himself in a great rear end collision. ~ James Thurber

She settled into a sitting position, wincing. "Oh, my poor rear end. I hope you appreciate what I went through to get here."
Alain watched her anxiously. "You have hurt your ... "
"My butt. Yeah." She returned his gaze, puzzled. "I'll survive. Why are you blushing?"
"Blushing?" His face felt warm. What did that mean?
"Yes." Mari laughed. Does talking about my butt embarrass you? I'm sorry. It's nothing special."
"I ... " His face felt even warmer. "I think it is."
"You do, huh? Where have you been all my life?"
This time he gave her a mystified look. "I sent almost all of it inside a Mage Guild Hall. The one in Ihris. You know this."
Mari laughed again. ~ Jack Campbell

You think!" cried Mama. "She's just a-looking after your backside and mine." But at least her arms let up. Shioni could breathe again.
"It'd take five of her to look after your backside."
Mama seemed to find his rudeness amusing. A beaming smile lit up her round face like the sun leaping above the hills of Abyssinia in the morning. "Better a plump, well-padded rump, than the rear end of a skinny goat like you, eh? ~ Marc Secchia

I just told Max flatly, "I had laser surgery last week to lighten my birthmark," as if it was no big deal.
Oh yeah?" he said. Unexpectedly, Max swiveled around, yanked his pants down.
The last thing I thought I had wanted to see tonight was Merc walking out the door. I was wrong. It was this stranger's rear end. "Please don't tell me this is one of those stripping telegrams? ~ Justina Chen

The corporate myth is over. If you've spent years climbing the corporate ladder,
have you ever stopped to notice the view? What view, you ask? The rear end of the
person in front of you. That's what you get to look forward to. If that's the way you
want to view the rest of your life, then this book probably isn't for you. But if you
are sick and tired of looking at someone else's behind, then read on. ~ Robert T. Kiyosaki

Packy watched her walk away, her perfect heart-shaped rear end testing the confines of her tight black dress. There was a God. Packy was now certain of it. How else could such heart-stopping beauty be accounted for? Such a thing could not be the product of a random universe. A flower, maybe. A rainbow, perhaps. But not Venus Versailles. ~ Quentin R. Bufogle

America would still be an unnamed continent full of migratory tribes chasing the rear end of a buffalo every time their stomachs growled. ~ Ann Coulter

I was bent over, mixing paint when Georgia slid up behind me and thwacked my rear end, hard, causing me to lurch and sloshing paint on my shoe.
"Did you just slap my ass?" I rubbed at it, completely offended, more than a little surprised.
"It was in my way. And it's kinda hard not to look at."
"It is? Why?" My incredulous voice squeaked in a very unmanly way...
"It's a great-looking ass. That's why," Georgia didn't sound particularly happy about it, honestly. ~ Amy Harmon

The life of an uneducated man is as useless as the tail of a dog which neither covers it's rear end, nor protects it from the bites of insects. ~ Chanakya

I'm kicking myself in the rear end every day, saying, 'Did I really book this many shows? What am I doing?' ~ Justin Moore

You can live by biblical principles, and you can teach by those principles and still be a winner. So many coaches think you've got to kick your players in the rear end. You've got to cuss them out. You've got to hit them across the head. No. You don't have to do that. ~ Bobby Bowden

Let's go over it again, shall we?"
"We will not shape-shift in front of your children unless it's an emergency," said Drake.
"And if it is an emergency, we will try to find a place to hide, or, if that isn't possible, we will change so that they see our backsides," added Darrius.
I stared at Drake. He rolled his eyes. "I did not 'flop around' in front of Jenny. I was behind the couch and she was on the stairs. She saw only my head." He pointed at his skull. "This one! On mein shoulders!"
"I know." I waved at them. "Continue."
"We will keep shorts or jeans stashed in many locations so that when we shift back into human form, we'll be able to cover our woobies," said Darrius.
"Excellent." I looked at Drake and smiled benignly. "How's your rear end?"
"Sore," he groused. "Not even Brigid would heal the scratches from that damned cat. ~ Michele Bardsley

What I have is a bunch of really hungry, amazingly talented guys that can kick anybody's rear end. ~ Neal Schon

The first place I gain weight is in my rear end. I love my butt, but I have a tendency to get saddlebags there, so I need to watch it. ~ Kourtney Kardashian

I've prided myself on being in excellent condition-as good as any man in my profession. Now this doesn't come from sitting around on your rear end. This comes from hard, hard work. ~ Wilt Chamberlain

A twerp was defined as a guy who put his set of false teeth up his rear end and bit the buttons off the backseats of taxicabs. ~ Kurt Vonnegut

Never comment on a woman's rear end. Never use the words 'large' or 'size' with 'rear end.' Never. Avoid the area altogether. Trust me. ~ Tim Allen

Jesus didn't just give hugs; He also gave a hammer. Paul didn't just pass on holy kisses; he also tirelessly dealt out swift and holy kicks to the rear end of the ancient church. The Bible has the manly stuff intact, and that is why it is such a great mystery how it got lost in the modern church. ~ Eric Ludy

I wanted to get up and face Setne, but my rear end had other ideas. It wanted to stay where it was and be in extreme pain. Butts are like that sometimes. They can be, well, butts. ~ Rick Riordan

Pat Patterson works at The Brisco Brothers bodyshop Yeah, he does rear-end work! ~ Jim Ross

I'm prepared. I have a gun and I know how to shoot, and whoever comes calling without an invitation will get it in the rear end. ~ Cary Grant

Bastien's gaze dropped to Terri's behind as he followed her out of the office. He was beginning to understand Lucern's fascination with Kate's behind. Not that he found Kate's rear end fascinating, but Terri's? Well, that was another matter. ~ Lynsay Sands

Every hour you spend on your rear end ... saps your energy and ruins your health. ~ Tom Rath

Have you ever watched a baby learning to walk? He totters, arms stretched out to balance himself. He wobbles - and falls, perhaps bumps his nose. Then he puts the palms of his little hands flat on the floor, hikes his rear end up, looks around to see if anybody is watching him. If nobody is, usually he doesn't bother to cry, just precariously balances himself - and tries again. Well, the baby can teach us. What you've undertaken ... isn't a state of perfection to be arrived at all of the sudden. It's a WALK, and a walk isn't static but ever-changing. We Friends say that all discouragement is from an evil source and can only end in more evil. Wallowing in self-condemnation or feeling sorry for yourself is worse than falling on your face in the first place ... So thee is human. ~ Catherine Marshall

Interesting outfit."

Clearly unabashed, she merely glanced down at herself, slicked long-fingered, bloodred-tipped hands over her hips and thighs. Then laughed low in her throat. "I know. It's a little over the top, isn't it? But I've got a hot date tonight and zero time to go home to change."

Shock reverberated in his gut and zinged down the nerve rich column of his spinal cord. Taking a hot step forward, he demanded before he could stop himself, "With who?"

She gave him a cool look, clearly wondering what the hell business he thought it was of his. Still, she answered him, which he hadn't actually expected.

"Eduardo," she said, drawing the syllables out, her lips caressing them as if they were made of Godiva chocolates. "He's an - " Cutting herself off, she shook her head. "Well. You don't give a rat's rear end who he is."

"Sure I do," he forced himself to say in a bored tone, dismayed to discover that part of him was seriously tempted to grab those spandex- wrapped arms and shake the information out of her. ~ Susan Andersen

Every time Europe looks across the Atlantic to see the American Eagle, it observes only the rear end of an ostrich. ~ H.G.Wells

I've heard a lot of nasty rhetoric about the president. We're going to kick your rear end out of the White House and stuff. That's just not the way I behave. ~ John Kasich

I warn you, Captain, God crafted these creatures for three things only. Passing wind from the rear end, passing wind from the front end, and spitting. They spit stomach acid so tell your men, and don't let anyone venture into the hold with a naked flame or you may find yourself the master of a marvelous collection of floating splinters. Also, we'll all drown. ~ Mark Lawrence

A couple of years later, I found out an angry hog is even worse than an angry beaver. My buddy Mike Williams invited me to go hog-hunting with him on a cantaloupe farm. Wild boars were destroying the cantaloupe crop, and the Louisiana Department of Wildlife and Fisheries gave the landowner permission to have hunters kill the hogs. They even let us chase the boars and shoot them from the back of a truck while the game wardens watched the proceedings from a distance! Now, I'd never hunted hogs, but a few of the guys I was hunting with claimed they were experts. We shot one or two hogs apiece and then chased a 360-pound boar into an adjoining cotton field.
My buddies convinced me to go into the overgrown cotton field and attempt to flush the hog out into the open. About a hundred yards into the thick brush, I heard the hog grunt. The hog was so close to me that when I put my scope on it to shoot, I couldn't tell if it was its front end or rear end! I fired my gun. Unfortunately, I shot the hog in the rear, which only made it madder! The hog turned around and charged toward me. I turned and ran out of the cotton field. I felt its tusks clipping at my ankles as I ran. Fortunately, I stayed ahead of the hog until we reached the cantaloupe field, and then to my surprise the hog fell into a heap. It was dead. I looked at my buddies and they were laughing and rolling on the ground. I thought it was a very strange response to my almost getting devoured by a vicious wild hog. I did ~ Jase Robertson

My best friend Zoe has a perfect rear end and stick legs, and long, silky black hair. She is obviously not descended from William Penn. There are no dowdy pilgrims in her ancestry. Whereas I am grounded and mired in this place, she's like milkweed fluff that will take off with the first strong breeze. Stronger than fluff, though. She's like a bullet just waiting for someone to pull the trigger. ~ Wendy Wunder

She had a rear end as big as an open dictionary and a bad attitude. ~ Elizabeth McCracken

Breaks balance out. The sun don't shine on the same ol' dog's rear end every day. ~ Darrell Royal

Since my baby left me, I've found a new place to dwell, down at the end of Lonely Street at Heartbreak Hotel. ~ Elvis Presley

Advising the Prince

The recluse Hsu Su Kwei had come to see Prince Wu.
The Prince was glad. "I have desired," he said, "To see you for a long time. Tell me if I am doing right.
I want to love my people, and by the exercise of justice
To put an end to war.
Is this enough?

"By no means," said the recluse.
"Your 'love' for your people
Puts them in mortal danger.
Your exercise of justice is the root
Of war after war!
Your grand intentions
Will end in disaster!

"If you set out to 'accomplish something great'
You only deceive yourself.
Your love and justice
Are fraudulent.
They are mere pretexts
For self-assertion, for aggression.
One action will bring on another
And in the chain of events
Your hidden intentions
Will be made plain.

You claim to practice justice. Should you seem to succeed
Success itself will bring more conflict.
Why all these guards
Standing at attention
At the palace gate around the temple altar
Everywhere.

You are at war with yourself!
You do not believe in justice,
Only in power and success.
If you overcome
An enemy and annex his country
You will be even less at peace
With yourself than you are now.
Nor will your passions let you
Sit still. You will fight again
And again for the sake of
A more perfect exercise of justice!< ~ Thomas Merton

As a dad, he thinks that his philosophy is morally correct. He has no conscience whatsoever about letting his kids put a penny in a light socket to find out electricity is not so good for you, and if you want to learn how to swim, you have to be thrown into the deep end. ~ Stacy Keach

I feel like the personal me and the artistic me are separate, but connected. It's almost like a Jekyll and Hyde thing. As much as you try to keep them apart, they end up together. I'm very much aware that when I'm miserable on the creative side - if I can't make things work a certain way - it really detracts from being the father I want to be. So in order to ultimately be a good father and the man I want to be I know I need to keep my creative side in check, or at least a little bit happy. It's weird how it's intertwined that way. ~ Frank Iero

To contemplation's sober eye,
Such is the race of man;
And they that creep, and they that fly,
Shall end where they began,
Alike the busy and the gay,
But flutter through life's little day. ~ Thomas Gray

Art is only a means to life, to the life more abundant. It is not in itself the life more abundant. It merely points the way, something which is overlooked not only by the public, but very often by the artist himself. In becoming an end it defeats itself. ~ Henry Miller

Neverfell was tired, so very tired. Waiting in her room to learn of her fate, her mind kept dropping away into sleep for numb instants no longer than a blink. Next moment her thoughts would jar her awake again, thrashing and crashing and clattering like a monstrous waterwheel, turning and turning without end or purpose. She jerked and stared and barely knew where she was, dream pieces floating like iceberg shards across her half-waking mind. ~ Frances Hardinge

You get a zero at the end of your age number, and you get some extra attention. That's what I found out. ~ Chick Corea

If a meteor falls in the forest and no one realizes it, does it end the war? ~ Scott Westerfeld

It's a risk, but I'm sort of ready to let go of thinking of movies as books that you can watch. The notion of, 'If I put the narrative blocks in the right order, this will solve all of my storytelling problems.' No, it won't, and you end up with little more than books on film. ~ Shane Carruth

Many people will have nothing at the end of their working lives. ~ Robert Kiyosaki

Afflictions have the same use and end to our souls, that frosty weather hath upon those clothes that are laid and bleaching, they alter the hue and make them white. ~ John Flavel

I walked all those miles, I learned all those lessons. It's as if my new life was the gift I got at the end of a long struggle. ~ Cheryl Strayed

I think in the end we will have negotiations with the House. They don't have any incentive for a long, drawn-out trial. We'll have negotiations with the White House. Despite all their threats they are going to have a prolonged defense. The reality is they are the driving force behind getting this over quickly. ~ Phil Gramm

Natural disasters are terrifying - that loss of control, this feeling that something is just going to randomly end your life for absolutely no reason is terrifying. But, what scares me is the human reaction to it and how people behave when the rules of civility and society are obliterated. ~ Eli Roth

I took a long time off to have my baby and spend time with my family. ~ Kelly Preston

it was as if he had swung outward at the end of a grape vine, over a ravine, and at the top of the swing had been caught in a prolonged instant of mesmerized gravity, weightless in time. ~ William Faulkner

Swaraj as conceived by me does not mean the end of kingship. ~ Mahatma Gandhi

Drop a grain of California gold into the ground, and there it will lie unchanged until the end of time; ... drop a grain of our blessed gold [wheat] into the ground and lo! a mystery. ~ Edward Everett

Despite all their surface diversity, most jokes and funny incidents have the following logical structure: Typically you lead the listener along a garden path of expectation, slowly building up tension. At the very end, you introduce an unexpected twist that entails a complete reinterpretation of all the preceding data, and moreover, it's critical that the new interpretation, though wholly unexpected, makes as much "sense" of the entire set of facts as did the originally "expected" interpretation.
In this regard, jokes have much in common with scientific creativity, with what Thomas Kuhn calls a "paradigm shift" in response to a single "anomaly." (It's probably not coincidence that many of the most creative scientists have a great sense of humor.) Of course, the anomaly in the joke is the traditional punch line and the joke is "funny" only if the listener gets the punch line by seeing in a flash of insight how a completely new interpretation of the same set of facts can incorporate the anomalous ending.
The longer and more tortuous the garden path of expectation, the "funnier" the punch line when finally delivered. ~ V.S. Ramachandran

Sometimes life seems a dark tunnel with no light at the end, but if you just keep moving forward, you will end up in a better place. ~ Jeffrey Fry

The person with a fixed goal, a clear picture of his desire, or an ideal always before him, causes it, through repetition, to be buried deeply in his subconscious mind and is thus enabled, thanks to its generative and sustaining power, to realize his goal in a minimum of time and with a minimum of physical effort. Just pursue the thought unceasingly. Step by step you will achieve realization, for all your faculties and powers become directed to that end ~ Claude M. Bristol

Life is short, but I never thought my life would end this way. I have myself to blame for that. I saw all of the red flags, but I ignored them one at a time. Every time I ignored them, I was buying more time, I received more time, and I gambled with the time that I was given. It shows you that buying time is temporary because sooner or later time runs out."
~Love is respect ♥~ ~ Charlena E. Jackson

Recognize that it is not really possible to steadily help others when we ourselves are not in good physical, mental, or emotional state. We may be able to carry on for a while, but sooner or later we end up feeling depleted, discouraged, or weak. We cannot keep on giving when we are running on an empty tank. We need to be solid. ~ Nhat Hanh

Perhaps we will end up one of those sad childless couples who spend all their time sleeping late, buying luxury goods, traveling the world, and enjoying each other's company. That would be terrible. ~ Michael Ian Black

Like any classic you hope to get rid of all the varnish that's built up over the centuries where people expect it to be in a certain way. It's a mighty play. It's about a very old king who also happens to be a very old father, so you've got the state and the domestic levels in there together. It's a story in extremis. Everyone knows the end, there's only two people left alive. ~ Geoffrey Rush

If you like a story that's totally different and won't know which way it's going ... where it's go ing to end up and which way it's going to take you, then I think my work fits the bill. ~ Rob Walton

A first-person voice helps to ensure the uniformity and cohesiveness of the narrative; it gathers unto itself incidents and characters in its unstoppable progress toward the story's end. ~ Norman Lock

The frustrated follow a leader less because of their faith that he is leading them to a promised land than because of their immediate feeling that he is leading them away from their unwanted selves. Surrender to a leader is not a means to an end but a fulfillment. Whither they are led is of secondary importance. ~ Eric Hoffer

Beside him Mr. Harris folded his morning newspaper and held it out to Claude.

"Seen this yet?"

"No."

"Don't read it," Mr. Harris said, folding the paper once more and sliding it under his rear. "It will only upset you, son."

"It's a wicked paper... " Claude agreed, but Mr. Harris was overspeaking him.

"It's the big black words that do it. The little grey ones don't matter very much, they're just fill-ins they take everyday from the wires. They concentrate their poison in the big black words, where it will radiate.

Of course if you read the little stories too you've got sure proof that every word they wrote above, themselves, was a fat black lie, but by then you've absorbed a thousand greyer ones, and where and how to check on those? This way the mind deteriorates. The best way you can save yourself is not to read it, son."

"No, I... "

"That's right, if you're not careful," Mr. Harris went on, blue-eyed, red-faced, "you find yourself pretty soon hating everyone but God, the Babe, and a few dead senators. That's no fun. Men aren't so bad as that."

"No."

"That's right, you begin to worry about anyone who opens his mouth except to say ho it looks like rain, let's bowl. Otherwise you wonder what the hell he's trying to prove, or undermine. If he asks what time it is, you wonder what terrible thing is scheduled to happen, where it will happen, when. You can't even stand to ~ Douglas Woolf

Do I believe in the supernatural? Oh yes, certainly. I can't believe, I can't accept that you die and that's the end. Physically maybe it is a fact. But there's something about the mind that's more than that. ~ Terence Fisher

What's the matter princess? Do you know the end of your story? ~ Cornelia Funke

What role have I left for religion? None. And I have left none because the Gospel of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ leaves none. Christianity is not a religion; it is the announcement of the end of religion. ~ Robert Farrar Capon

Start buying gold now, regardless of the price. By acting now, you will not have to react when it's too late. Too late will be when the majority of the public finally figures out what is happening to paper money and frantically tries to get aboard. Remember, if you're one of the ones holding paper in the end, you will have given away your products and services for nothing. ~ Robert Ringer

People often say that women forget what childbirth is like, because if they remembered, no one would ever do it more than once. Personally, I had no trouble at all remembering. The sense of massive inertia, particularly. That endless time toward the end, when it seems that it never will end, that one is mired in some prehistoric tar pit, every small move a struggle doomed to futility. Every square centimeter of skin stretched as thin as one's temper. You don't forget. You simply get to the point where you don't care what birth will feel like; anything is better than being pregnant for an instant longer. ~ Diana Gabaldon

Today we must make a pact with each other to end this reckless conduct with the people's government. ~ Chris Christie

Our lives are all stories, in the end. ~ Kat Zhang