Pg Wodehouse Quotes

From my earliest years I had always wanted to be a writer. It was not that I had any particular message for humanity. I am still plugging away and not the ghost of one so far, so it begins to look as though, unless I suddenly hit mid-season form in my eighties, humanity will remain a message short. ~ P.G. Wodehouse

Attention spans are changing. It's very noticeable. I am very aware that the kind of books I read in my childhood kids now won't be able to read. I was reading Kipling and PG Wodehouse and Shakespeare at the age of 11. The kind of description and detail I read I would not put in my books. I don't know how much you can fight that because you want children to read. So I pack in excitement and plot and illustrations and have a cliffhanger every chapter. Charles Dickens was doing cliffhangers way back when. But even with all the excitement you have to make children care about the characters. ~ Cressida Cowell

Love is dirty-sloppy-stupid. The problem has always been: How do we contain such a dangerous substance (love) in the confines of holy matrimony without hurting or killing someone?
pg ii ~ Michael Ben Zehabe

You on your way out?" Jace nodded. "Dont want to overstay our welcome." "What welcome?" Magnus asked. "I'd say is was a pleasure to meet you, but it wasn't. Not that you aren't all fairly charming, and as for you-" He dropped a glittery wink at Alec, who looked astounded. "Call me?" -Magnus & Jace, pg.243- ~ Cassandra Clare

That's good," I said. "And if you have a nice time this morning on the sands with your spade and bucket, you will come and tell me all about it, won't you? I have so little on my mind just now that it's a treat to hear all about your happy holiday."
Satirical, if you see what I mean. Sarcastic. Almost bitter, as a matter of fact, if you come right down to it. ~ P.G. Wodehouse

I give you my word that, until I started to tramp the place with this child, I never had a notion that it was such a difficult job restoring a son to his parents. How kidnappers ever get caught is a mystery to me. I searched Marvis Bay like a bloodhound, but nobody came forward to claim the infant. You would have thought, from the lack of interest in him, that he was stopping there all by himself in a cottage of his own. ~ P.G. Wodehouse

He does not ask everyone to give all they have. But if He does, are we willing?
pg 103 ~ Roseanna M. White

The evening's light, silvery, casts its dull brightness onto the trees--trees gelid in this blue light of winter. But whiteness dominates with the pines and evergreens steeped in vibrant grades of silver. I hear notes in the mist, like silvery chattering, coins in a pocket, the jangle of keys. Pg 217 ~ S.K. Kalsi

Freddie experienced the sort of abysmal soul-sadness which afflicts one of Tolstoy's Russian peasants when, after putting in a heavy day's work strangling his father, beating his wife, and dropping the baby into the city's reservoir, he turns to the cupboards, only to find the vodka bottle empty. ~ P.G. Wodehouse

Don't you understand that freedom depends upon the continuing possibility of rebel violence. When violence becomes unthinkable, freedom dies ... ~ Samuel B. Southwell

Sex attraction is so purely a question of the taste of the individual that the wise man never argues about it. He accepts its vagaries as part of the human mystery, and leaves it at that. ~ P.G. Wodehouse

I brought you some coffee." he held out the cup but she waved it away.
"I hate that stuff. It tastes like feet."
At that he smiled. "How would you know what feet taste like?"
"I just know."
-Luke and Clary, pg.209- ~ Cassandra Clare

Human beings appear to be sufficiently selfish and calculating to be capable of indefinitely greater harmony and social homeostasis. This statement is not self-contradictory. True selfishness, if obedient to the other constraints of mammalian biology, is the key to a more nearly perfect social contract. - pg. 157 ~ Edward O. Wilson

Brookfield, my correspondent, writes that last week he observed him in the moonlight at an advanced hour gazing up at his window."
"Whose window? Brookfield's?"
"Yes, sir. Presumably under the impression that it was the young lady's."
"But what the deuce is he doing at Twing at all?"
"Mr Little was compelled to resume his old position as tutor to Lord Wickhammersley's son at Twing Hall, sir. Owing to having been unsuccessful in some speculations at Hurst Park at the end of October."
"Good Lord, Jeeves! Is there anything you don't know?"
"I couldn't say, sir. ~ P.G. Wodehouse

away from fast food - for three weeks already. And I was starting to miss the occasional burger and fries. I assumed there'd be a few of the other lads feeling the same way. I talked to Sven, who thought it wouldn't do any harm, and then had a word with the England chefs. On the Wednesday night we all trooped down to dinner. The doors of the dining room were shut and there were two giant golden arches stuck up on them. We all went inside and there was a McDonald's takeaway mountain waiting for us: more burgers, cheeseburgers and chips than you've ever seen piled up in one room in your life. It was a complete surprise to all the players. We just devoured everything: it was like watching kids going mad in a candy store. And it worked. We did it again before we played Denmark. Maybe fast food was what was missing from our preparations for facing Brazil. ~ David Beckham

He couldn't have moved quicker if he had been the dachshund Poppet, who at this juncture was running round in circles, trying, if I read his thoughts aright, to work off the rather heavy lunch he had had earlier in the afternoon. ~ P.G. Wodehouse

A nothing that said everything. - Pg. 173 ~ Robert Harris

Offering thanks and singing praises to God, compels the Lord to act in our behalf, to either calm the storm to a whisper, or to give us the strength to endure the storm. Whichever He chooses, He brings us out of our distress and into His peace." Meet Him on the Mountain pg. 138. ~ Sheldon K. Bass

And if several of the more difficult sciences are still [pg 023] in so defective a state; if not only so little is proved, but disputation has not terminated even about the little which seemed to be so; the reason perhaps is, that men's logical notions have not yet acquired the degree of extension, or of accuracy, requisite for the estimation of the evidence proper to those particular departments of knowledge. ~ John Stuart Mill

This Vladimir Brusiloff to whom I have referred was the famous Russian novelist ... Vladimir specialized in gray studies of hopeless misery, where nothing happened till page three hundred and eighty, when the moujik decided to commit suicide ...
Cuthbert was an optimist at heart, and it seemed to him that, at the rate at which the inhabitants of that interesting country were murdering one another, the supply of Russian novelists must eventually give out. ~ P.G. Wodehouse

What magic there is in a girl's smile! It is the raisin which, dropped in the yeast of male complacency, induces fermentation. ~ P.G. Wodehouse

He (Jace) glanced down at his bound hands. His wrists and shoulders had gone from aching to hard, stabbing pain, but he didn't wince as the inquisitor regarded one of the blades, named it Jophiel, and plunged it into the polished wooden floorboards at her feet. He waited, but nothing happened.
"Boom," he said eventually. "Was something supposed to happen there?"
~pg.303~ ~ Cassandra Clare

Cheer up, Crips, and keep smiling. That's the thing to do. If you go through life with a smile on your face, you'll be amazed how many people will come up to you and say 'What the hell are you grinning about? What's so funny?' Make you a lot of new friends. ~ P.G. Wodehouse

It looked something like a pen wiper and something like a piece of hearth-rug. A second and keener inspection revealed it as a Pekinese puppy. ~ P.G. Wodehouse

When you have been just told that the girl you love is definitely betrothed to another, you begin to understand how Anarchists must feel when the bomb goes off too soon. ~ P.G. Wodehouse

You don't construct your stories well, Pugsy. You start at the end, then go back to any part which happens to appeal to you at the moment, and eventually wind up at the beginning. ~ P.G. Wodehouse

I've found, as a general rule of life, that the things you think are going to be the scaliest nearly always turn out not so bad after all. ~ P.G. Wodehouse

I was conscious of a passing pang for the oyster world, feeling
and I think correctly
that life for these unfortunate bivalves must be one damn thing after another. ~ P.G. Wodehouse

A very little quiet reflection was enough to satisfy Emma ~ Jane Austen

The trouble with you, Spode, is that just because you have succeeded in inducing a handful of half-wits to disfigure the London scene by going about in black shorts, you think you're someone. You hear them shouting "Heil, Spode!" and you imagine it is the Voice of the People. That is where you make your bloomer. What the Voice of the People is saying is: "Look at that frightful ass Spode swanking about in footer bags! Did you ever in your puff see such a perfect perisher? ~ P.G. Wodehouse

Bad experience is more bearable when you are not the only sufferer.
~pg 95 ~ Nien Cheng

I'm all for rational enjoyment, and so forth, but I think a fellow makes himself conspicuous when he throws soft-boiled eggs at the electric fan ~ P.G. Wodehouse

I was in rare fettle and the heart had touched a new high. I don't know anything that braces one up like finding you haven't got to get married after all. ~ P.G. Wodehouse

To erroneously assert that the unclaimed Shunemite does not treasure the opportunity misses the entire point of this superlative song. She wants to leave with Solomon. This earthly Shunemite would be willing to die to be with Solomon
but until she develops skills of value to his kingdom
she will remain unclaimed.
pg 10 ~ Michael Ben Zehabe

Are there any books of that sort nowadays? The only ones I ever see mentioned in the papers are about married couples who find life grey, and can't stick each other at any price. ~ P.G. Wodehouse

Pg 102 "Maybe you don't have to think about hell because probly nobody you know going to end up there."
pg 238 "Sleep is mercy. You can feel it coming on, like being swept up in something ... You had to trust sleep when it came or it would just leave you there, waiting."
Pg 253 " And if she prayed now, it was really remembering the comfort he put around her, the warmth of his body still in that coat. It was a shock to her, a need she only discovered when it was satisfied, for those few minutes. In those days she had all the needs she could stand already, and here was another one. ~ Marilynne Robinson

I remember when I was a kid at school having to learn a poem of sorts about a fellow named Pig-something - a sculptor he would have been, no doubt - who made a statue of a girl, and what should happen one morning but that the bally thing suddenly came to life. A pretty nasty shock for the chap, of course, but the point I'm working round to is that there were a couple of lines that went, if I remember correctly: She starts. She moves. She seems to feel The stir of life along her keel. And what I'm driving at is that you couldn't get a better description of what happened to Gussie as I spoke these heartening words. His brow cleared, his eyes brightened, he lost that fishy look, and he gazed at the slug, which was still on the long, long trail with something approaching bonhomie. A marked improvement. ~ P.G. Wodehouse

Everything is relative. you, for instance, are my relative. ~ P.G. Wodehouse

A man's subconscious self is not the ideal companion. It lurks for the greater part of his life in some dark den of its own, hidden away, and emerges only to taunt and deride and increase the misery of a miserable hour. ~ P.G. Wodehouse

The Hunger Games gets people invested in a contest. People are rooting for their favorites, rooting for their survival. And suddenly, unwittingly, the people being oppressed are actually engaged in this form of entertainment...The way you get control of people is to make them participate, not just subjugate them." -Gary Ross, pg. 154 ~ Kate Egan

Dark hair fell in a sweep over his forehead. He looked like a man who would write vers libre, as indeed he did. ~ P.G. Wodehouse

Those who know Bertram Wooster best are aware that he is a man of sudden, strong enthusiasms and that, when in the grip of one of these, he becomes a remorseless machine - tense, absorbed, single-minded. ~ P.G. Wodehouse

Mom says,'What are you going to do when it's time to go to college?' I choose not to think about that yet. That is years away. For now, I just watn things all safe and familiar. My life may not be perfect, but it is what I have known.
~pg 16; Hattie on change ~ Ann M. Martin