Ninjago Funny Quotes

I love kids; I think they are fun and funny. ~ Courtney Thorne-Smith

So I need to lay down some ground rules."
"Rules for the use of the ground?" He's gazing out the window. "Am I still allowed to step on it? ~ Eva Morgan

A cynic is a man who knows the price of everything and the value of nothing. ~ Shane Kuhn

Yo, beautiful. Come pop this collar off me."
Natalya hissed, "Are you mad?"
"What's she gonna do? Vivisect me? Imprison me? We've got a pact to fulfill,remember?"
To Dorada, she cried, "Seriously, sweetheart, shake that mummified ass over here."
Regin kicked the glass. "Lemme the fuck out - "
La Dorada swung her head around,peering at Regin with her one eye.
"Okay. That's freaky. Lookit, Gollum, if you spring me, I'll help you find your Precious. ~ Kresley Cole

The wife's gotta know. You can't hook up like that for what looks like about six or seven years without the wife figuring it out. Unless she's another idiot.
"I'm not an idiot."

Smiling, Roarke continued to stroke. "I'll keep that in mind when I decide to have a long-term affair."
"Yeah, you do that. They'll never find your body," she murmured, then dropped into sleep.

His smiled warmed, and feeling well loved, he dropped off with her. ~ J.D. Robb

I was just a goofy little funny kid, who was always getting sent to the principal. It wasn't serious because I was smart. I wasn't like a true troublemaker, just rambunctious - like, talkative and trying to be funny. That was me in middle-school. ~ J. Cole

I already have two movies in the can, low-key, which are 'Vincent-N-Roxxy' and 'Keanu' with Key and Peele, which is my first comedy, and it's going to be super dope, definitely funny. They're so great, and they've been such life coaches to me. ~ Jason Mitchell

I was looking at a bottle of water; they have nutritional facts printed on the side. You know, I'm no chemist, but I have a rough idea what's in water. ~ Jim Gaffigan

I started off thinking Eminem was a flash in the pan, a kind of hip-hop Hanson brother. How wrong I was. Recovery is sometimes funny, sometimes terrible, always painfully honest. The matching of Eminem and Rihanna on "Love the Way You Lie" is pure genius. "Not Afraid" is pretty great too. ~ Stephen King

There was a lot more to magic, as Harry quickly found out, than waving your wand and saying a few funny words. ~ J.K. Rowling

By the time we get to church, I need church cuz I've been yelled at by everyone in the family. ~ Jeff Foxworthy

The world really changed after 9/11, not just in the tragic way, but in every way. So it took me a couple of years to even understand how my art form I could process any of this. When the world changed, eliciting laughter with subjects that were funny to me before 9/11 just didnt seem good enough. ~ Albert Brooks

I know it sounds abysmal…" he chuckled at the mere thought of it, "but I just want to be happy and content"

"Do you not dream big? Do you not want to travel?"

Kalki rounded his arms around his little brother. "Perhaps I chose not to. Perhaps big doesn't always matter. It's also the little things, specks of happiness that we go through in a day that we should look out for. It's funny how grief makes you realize the good things you have overlooked in life ~ Kevin Missal

I think it would be funny for people to read in obituaries of me that my major contribution to the arts was the popularization of the phrases 'neutral facial expression' and 'screaming in agony.' ~ Tao Lin

Human history's the most funny and yet the most tragic discovery will be the discovery of the religious people that all religions are man-made! And this childish discovery will enable the pious to make an intellectual jump in the upwards direction. The devout will turn into a progressive man and the history will flow faster in the progressive direction. ~ Mehmet Murat Ildan

Why don't they allow professional wrestling at the Olympics? They allow pro basketball players and hockey players. Olympic pro wrestling would be awesome. The team from Mexico could wear those Mr. X masks. The French wrestler could hit his opponent with a baguette. Or perhaps just surrender. ~ Craig Ferguson

She already had a headache-she didn't want to add 'get tortured' to today's to-do list. ~ C.C. Hunter

Every man has to settle down eventually. You know why you gotta settle
down eventually? Because you don't want to be the old guy in the club.
You know what I'm talking about. Every club you go into, there's always
some old guy. He ain't really old, just a little too old to be in the
club. ~ Chris Rock

If you start wondering how this house works, you'll likely go mad. That could be amusing, I suppose. Especially if it's the kind of madness that causes you to run naked through the hallways. Do feel free to indulge in that anytime. ~ Rosamund Hodge

When a writer with a voice as good as Richard Christian Matheson's tells you something, you have no choice but to listen. In THE RITUAL OF ILLUSION the voices are legion, and the gaps between their testimonies drag us closer to understanding the darkly beating heart of all our, ephemeral, transfixing dreams. Dark, subtle, horrifically funny. ~ Michael Marshall Smith

I didn't want to prejudge but based on the company he kept, the glistening of his suit, and the poser-like swagger, I somehow suspected that Shiny Suit was what the students today technically refer to as a douchebag. ~ Harlan Coben

I come from a stupid family. My father worked in a bank. They caught him stealing pens. ~ Rodney Dangerfield

We have to be more interested in making things better than just being right, or interesting, or funny. ~ Roxane Gay

Before the Kennedys were elected, there had been older Presidents. Then here was this devastatingly attractive young couple with two beautiful children. They were so intelligent, graceful, gracious and funny. They enjoyed life so much. That's what caught America's eye. ~ Letitia Baldrige

God, do I hate my little fat tits. You ever pinch your little meat tits and wish you were dead? You ever just stand naked in the mirror. "You little fat-titted mediocre failure!" You ever do that for 3 hours on New Year's Eve. ~ Jim Norton

The French: a people who have used their sophisticated culture and beautiful language to bequeath to the world the sliced potato. ~ Bauvard

You know what's funny about death? I mean other than absolutely nothing at all? You'd think we could remember finding out we weren't immortal. Sometimes I see children sobbing airports and I think, Aww. They've just been told. ~ Carrie Fisher

You ever talk about a movie with someone that read the book? They're always so condescending. 'Ah, the book was much better than the movie.' Oh really? What I enjoyed about the movie: no reading. ~ Jim Gaffigan

The only thing that I don't like is my kids watching comedy that isn't actually funny. There's a lot of supposed tween comedy on TV that isn't particularly funny, but it's got a lot of laugh track. And I go, 'Please don't watch that. Please just watch something that's actually funny.' ~ Stephen Colbert

What's that around your neck?" asked Emily.
"It's a golden star." Said Reed.
"What did you get it for?"
"Chemistry class."
"What's the star for?" the shadow asked, Usually stars represent a straight A student.
"You get it for having greatness. But Emily doesn't know what that is." He said, answering the shadows question and looking at Emily.
"Greatness, what's greatness?" Emily asked, all wide eyed, and clueless looking
"It's when you do really awesome stuff, and people recognize you for it."
"Oh, no" Emily laughed ."No, I don't know what that is. ~ Rumi Antoinette

The important thing for any writer to remember is to take the writing seriously, but not the writer. ~ A.E. Poynor

I remember a very tender moment from that year, when Steve and I were lying on the floor watching Ellen do a series of crazy, arm-flinging, and knee-slapping dances and tumbles. I looked at Steve and said, "Isn't it funny how I just love her that much more for being so vulnerable and uninhibited and goofy. I could never do that. Can you imagine knowing that you're loved like that?"
Steve looked at me and said, "I love you exactly like that. ~ Brene Brown

On a traffic light green means 'go' and yellow means 'yield', but on a banana it's just the opposite. Green means 'hold on,' yellow means 'go ahead,' and red means, 'where the hell did you get that banana at?' ~ Mitch Hedberg

Love is the point where Yes meets Yesterday, and that's why I put the No in Now. ~ Dark Jar Tin Zoo

My silence was reward for you saying something intelligent. I'm a firm believer in positive reinforcement. ~ Sam Argent

I'm totally comfortable not being as funny as Larry David. ~ Jeff Garlin

She got off the train, and John-Paul lifted a hand and smiled. Janie waved back, and as she walked down the railway platform toward him, it came to her with a tiny, bitter shock of self-revelation that it wasn't that she liked Connor more than John-Paul, it was that she liked John-Paul far too much. It was a strain being with someone so good-looking and smart and funny and nice. She was dazzled by John-Paul. Connor was dazzled by her. And it was more fun doing the dazzling. Girls were meant to do the dazzling. John-Paul's interest ~ Liane Moriarty

We had to go to stew school for five weeks. We'd go through a whole week of make-up and poise. I didn't like this. They make you feel like you've never been out in public. They showed you how to smoke a cigarette, when to smoke a cigarette, how to look at a man's eyes. Our teacher, she had this idea we had to be sexy. One day in class she was showing us how to accept a light for a cigarette from a man and never blow it out. When he lights it, just look in his eyes. It was really funny, all the girls laughed. ~ Studs Terkel

Maybe I'm delusional but I'm usually funny. It's not 100% but I have a pretty good batting average. ~ Adam Carolla

I had everything I'd hoped for, but I wasn't being myself. So I decided to be honest about who I was. It was strange: The people who loved me for being funny suddenly didn't like me for being ... me. ~ Ellen DeGeneres

You belong in an insane asylum, you know that?"
"Maybe my next case... ~ R.R. Virdi

I see uncool people! ~ Tonya Hurley

I'm at a Hollywood premiere and I haven't fainted. I'd say I'm doing pretty good. ~ Veronica Blade

The idea that you can't be attractive and funny at the same time is something that I hate. ~ Emma Stone

Funny how ready people are to believe that counseling, which even when voluntary takes years to modify garden-variety neuroses, can work wonders in months with resistant patients who hate each other. ~ Katha Pollitt

Glances were exchanged around the table. There were some uneasy winces, a couple of ambivalent shrugs, a few determined nods, and one delighted giggle (but only because Duncan had spotted another funny caterpillar). ~ Christopher Healy

She handed him a glass of water and two Aleve gelcaps. "They're anti-inflammatories. They will dull the pain a little bit and keep down swelling and redness. Swallow the pills, don't chew."
"Well, I thought I'd stick them into my nose and impersonate a walrus, but if you insist, I'll swallow them. ~ Ilona Andrews

His eyes widened. Oh, hell, you think I'm going to let him bite me? No way. It's too risky and way too guy. ~ C.C. Hunter