Nappies Quotes

The third umpires should be changed as often as nappies and for the same reason. ~ Navjot Singh Sidhu

If I had a choice about going to a meeting at a studio or changing a nappy, I'd choose the nappy. ~ Tim Burton

She [my wife] has had a Caesarean, so she can't bend over. It's a good excuse [for not changing nappies], I suppose. ~ Kevin Pietersen

Love yourself. Just love yourself. In fact, the love of the self cures every kind of problem you have with yourself. For instance, if someone calls you nappy-headed, it rolls right off your body, if you love nappy hair. Or if someone calls you buck-toothed or too black, that won't be a problem if you love being buck-toothed or black. If you love it, then so what. The development of self-love cures many of the ills that people suffer from. ~ Alice Walker

I love every minute of fatherhood, staying up all night, changing nappies, kids crying, I find it really funny and inspiring. It connects you to the world in a new way. ~ Elton John

I've always found cherubs a bit sinister. The idea of winged babies flying around with no nappies on seems like an accident waiting to happen. There would be shit everywhere. If I saw a cherub flying about in real life it would terrify me, whereas a Cyclops, which is another mythical being, wouldn't scare me at all, as it's just a bloke with one eye. He'd be registered disabled and get a decent parking space in today's world. ~ Karl Pilkington

Some people won't like me; that's just human nature. I battled with that for years, trying to please people, but now I haven't got time to win people over! I've got nappies to change! ~ Rebecca Ferguson

I need a night out away from crayon drawings on the wall, mushed food in the carpets, and poo-splosions in nappies. ~ K.M. Golland

Has it ever occurred to you that a woman, when she is powerful, is more powerful than a man?" "Powerful in a different way, perhaps." Laud said: "It's a power partly based on fear. Perhaps the fear is atavistic, memories of babyhood. Women change the nappy, give the breast or withhold it." Langton said with a faint smile: "Not now, apparently. Fathers change nappies and it's usually a bottle." "But I'm right, Hubert, about power and fear. I wouldn't say it outside these walls, but life in Chambers would be a great deal easier if Venetia fell under that convenient Number 11 bus." He paused, and then asked the question to which he needed an answer. "So I have your support, have I? Can I take it that I'm your choice to succeed you as Head of Chambers? ~ P.D. James

There is nothing like waking up at six in the morning and changing a baby's nappy to bring you face to face with life's reality. ~ Tony Blair

Social media is basically standing at a bucket filled with other people's vomit and you suck the vomit through a straw, and gag and wince at the unbearable taste of other people's vomit. Yet strangely we continue to suck through the straw as if we've never tasted such lovely vomit. And then before you know it you're old and you're grey. And that's the end of you. A lonely death. Your gravestone is marked with the six saddest words:

Social Media Drained My Soul Away

And they all mourn your loss at a budget funeral service while updating their social media statuses on mobile phones apps. And in years to come nobody remembers any of your updates; even those updates that you deep-down believed were going to bring about world peace. The Digital Age is more disposable than nappies and just as full of shit. ~ Rupert Dreyfus

Some folks of cider make a rout
And cider's well enough no doubt
When better liquors fail;
But wine, that's richer, better still,
Ev'n wine itself (deny't who will)
Must yield to nappy ale ~ John Gay

While Mum was a busy working mother, helping my father in his constituency duties and beyond, Lara became my surrogate mum. She fed me almost every supper I ate--from when I was a baby up to about five years old. She changed my nappies, she taught me to speak, then to walk (which, with so much attention from her, of course happened ridiculously early). She taught me how to get dressed and to brush my teeth.
In essence, she got me to do all the things that either she had been too scared to do herself or that just simply intrigued her, such as eating raw bacon or riding a tricycle down a steep hill with no brakes.
I was the best rag doll of a baby brother that she could have ever dreamt of.
It is why we have always been so close. To her, I am still her little baby brother. And I love her for that. But--and this is the big but--growing up with Lara, there was never a moment's peace. Even from day one, as a newborn babe in the hospital's maternity ward, I was paraded around, shown off to anyone and everyone--I was my sister's new "toy." And it never stopped.
It makes me smile now, but I am sure it is why in later life I craved the peace and solitude that mountains and the sea bring. I didn't want to perform for anyone, I just wanted space to grow and find myself among all the madness.
It took a while to understand where this love of the wild came from, but in truth it probably developed from the intimacy found with my father on the shores of Northern Ire ~ Bear Grylls

I'm still not good at changing nappies, but I do do it. ~ Rod Stewart

The nappies, the sleepless nights, the endless crying, the love like you've never imagined was possible, like your heart is living on the outside of your body? The chaos and the fear and the pride and the chance to tuck someone in and read them to sleep? To do all of that with you? I couldn't be more sure. ~ Cassandra Clare

At home in Nigeria, all a mother had to do for a baby was wash and feed him and, if he was fidgety, strap him onto her back and carry on with her work while that baby slept. But in England she had to wash piles and piles of nappies, wheel the child round for sunshine during the day, attend to his feeds as regularly as if one were serving a master, talk to the child, even if he was only a day old! Oh, yes, in England, looking after babies was in itself a full-time job. ~ Buchi Emecheta

A man who lives long enough will be a boy twice. ~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

I don't ask my wife to face Michael Holding, so there's no reason why I should be changing nappies ~ Ian Botham

Shitty nappy whizzing through the air, you don't see that in the brochures. ~ Karl Pilkington

Birth, death . . .?' 'And nappies, madam. Things men don't do. ~ Catriona McPherson