Momma Quotes

I need one, Momma, how come I don't have a baby sister?"

Rachel smiled. "You're so perfect. There was no need to ask for another."

Sophie cocked her head to the side like a puppy. "Ask who?"

"The Stork," Faith supplied.

Sophie looked thoroughly confused then. "I thought sex caused babies."

Rachel patted Faith on the back when she began to cough.

Kaycee shook her head. "Rhonda at school told me that special music causes babies. her sister told her that when her mom and dad play music in their bedroom, babies were being made. Momma, you play music in your room, but we don't have a baby."

"I don't have that particular CD, sweetie."

"My friend told me that it takes a penny and a Virginia to make a baby," Sophie said and sent Faith into another coughing fit. ~ Robin Alexander

My momma once told me, you don't need to be pushed in order to fall. I don't think you'll need to do much pushing, Jessica. ~ Penny Reid

My momma always said the best way to get what you want from people is to give them what they think they want. They expected me to be stupid, so I used that to our advantage. ~ Justina Ireland

They'll be days like this" my momma said.
When you open your hands to catch, and wind up with only blisters and bruises.
When you try to step out of the phone booth and try to fly , and the very people you want to save, are the ones standing on your cape.
When your boots will fill with rain, and you'll be up to your knees with disappointment
And those are the very days you have all the more reason to say "Thank you". ~ Sarah Kay

My momma always said bossy was good for a deputy and bad for everything else. ~ James Buchanan

Yo momma so poor that when I rang her doorbell, she said "ding-dong. ~ Various

Bad moments don't make bad mommas. ~ Lysa TerKeurst

Most of the town couldn't stand Momma, yet would show up because it was the proper thing to do then proceed to judge us on the pageantry of her burial. ~ Denise Grover Swank

Someone needs to break that rotation saying "grandma did that" or "momma slept around" "auntie did the same" or "cousins did it too" just rotation after rotation. ~ Sarah Bodiford

We want to make decisions based on facts. Many people do not. They make their decisions based on what their momma says or what their daddy says or what their political party says - without engaging their brains. ~ Ben Carson

Uncle Drew?"
"Yes?"
"Is you gonna die alone?"
i smirk. "I don't plan on dying for a long time, honey"
"Momma says you're gonna die alone. She tol' Daddy that you gonna die and it be days till a Cleanin' lady find your rottin' corpse."
lovely. Thank you, Alexandra
"Wha's a corpse, uncle Drew?"
Wow. ~ Emma Chase

Miss America was always white. All the beautiful brown women in America, beautiful sun tans, beautiful shapes, all types of complexions, but she always was white.And Miss World was always white, and Miss Universe was always white.And the angel fruit cake was the white cake and the devil food cake was the chocolate cake.I said, 'Momma, why is everything white?' I always wondered. And the President lived in the White House. ~ Muhammad Ali

All my momma's people were very musical. My grandpa, who was the Pentecostal minister, he was a great musician. He played the fiddle, he played the piano. ~ Dolly Parton

Momma used to say there were lots of ways to survive. Don't e afraid to pretend to be something you aren't, Jane. Some times a little subterfuge and chicanery is in order and the quickest way to achieve one's goal. It ain't hard to imagine Ida pretending to be just another dumb colored girl in order to make it out here. Survival by any means necessary. ~ Justina Ireland

Like Momma says, only thing you get by digging dirt is dirty. ~ Jamie Farrell

Do what your momma tells you to do, go to sunday school, go to church, and when you die, you'll go to Statesboro. ~ Erk Russell

I loved my own Grandparents with all my heart. I learned important lessons from them about how to treat people, how to cook and how to work ... they showered us kids with love and left the parenting to Momma and Daddy. That's the beauty of being a grandparent - the hard work belongs to someone else. I guess I never really understood the depth of their love for me until I became a grandmother myself ... it is unlike any other relationship. ~ Paula Deen

We came here because no place would take us after our momma died. They all said go away, come back when you're older, when you know better, when you've learned. Only no one wants to teach how to be older or to know better - not even Devin. They just teach us how to be broken. ~ Seanan McGuire

Top shelf where momma hides the cookies! ~ Rick Jeanneret

In the South, our lives kind of revolve around food and taking care of people with food. If someone was sick, or if they had had a baby, or if they had lost a loved one, or even if they lost a job, my momma was at their door with pie or a cake or something to help them feel better. ~ Kimberly Schlapman

I always asked my mother, I said, 'Momma, how come is everything white?' I said, 'Why is Jesus white with blond hair and blue eyes? Why is the Lord's supper all white men? Angels are white, the Pope, Mary, and even the angels.' I said, 'Mother, when we die, do we go to Heaven?' She said, 'Naturally we go to Heaven.' I said, 'Well, what happened to all the black angels?' ~ Muhammad Ali

Men: they are what they are and women have to accept that and try to shift around them. Especially men with power. Money. The upper hand. The raised hand. Momma`s philosophy. Here`s to you, Momma.
She raised the empty cup.
What`s the use of fighting them. What`s the use. To struggle, to live in anger takes everything out of you, drains you, makes people hate you and what`s the use? You get nothing you want, all you get is tired. ~ Marilyn French

Why doesn't momma come back? ~ Cynthia Voigt

It's 1936, in Flint, Michigan. Times are hard. Ten-year-old Bud is a motherless boy on the run, and his momma never told him who his father was. But she left a clue: posters of Herman ~ Christopher Paul Curtis

After Shelly left the bedroom earlier, I'd gone through my stuff, looking for something decent to wear. All I had were jeans and T-shirts, so I picked the least worn of each and pulled them on. Then I put on socks. My momma always said you should meet a guest in shoes, family in socks, and friends in bare feet.

I don't know why she said this, but it stuck with me. ~ Penny Reid

My momma used to say that a girl had to find her prince after wading through the frogs. ~ Shelly Crane

I like the hip writers: Fitzgerald, the guy who committed suicide, Hemingway, all those guys. Some of them were alcoholics and drug addicts but they had fun. They were real people. They formed the culture of American literature. Hemingway admired Tolstoy, Tolstoy admired Pushkin, and Mailer admired Hemingway. It all flows down. The greats are all connected. One day I'm gonna write a book myself. The first chapter will be about what a rough deal my momma got. She believed in you guys and your society. ~ Mike Tyson

Whenever I'd get howlin' over something, he'd grab my ass up from wherever I was and head straight for the john. Momma said my head would get banged up along the way, but she said it
was probably bein' dunked under water that made me stupid. ~ Cole Alpaugh

Well, a little girl is more likely to trust a person who reminds her of her momma, right? Depends on what her momma's like, I thought. ~ Gillian Flynn

Make your mess your message," Momma liked to say. And I did. ~ Robin Roberts

Today, I celebrate my Mother. Strong, passionate, stubborn and proud. An educator, and wife. She was both fearless and vulnerable, unashamed of either. She demanded the best, especially of me. I dedicate my life to exceeding her highest expectations. This is how I honor my Mother, my friend, my inspiration. In spirit she forever guides me. Thank you momma, for I am never lost. ~ Carlos Wallace

When I want to be lectured on strategy, I'll consult someone who's actually won battles,' Amelie said. 'Not one who ran away from them.'
'Snap,' Eve said.
'You know what they're talking about?' Shane asked.
'Don't need to know to get that one. She smacked him so hard his momma felt it. ~ Rachel Caine

Miss Trudie said, "Well, like my momma used to say, butter my butt and call me a biscuit. This takes the cake. ~ Dorothea Benton Frank

I even pulled out the can of cat treats. Yes, I'd bought him treats. Give it another month and I'd be collecting his shed whiskers and claws like a proud momma preserving her baby's first haircut and lost teeth. ~ Kelley Armstrong

My music teacher was like, "Ester, you need to pay attention in class." I'm like, "No miss lady, 'cause I can sing." I didn't want anybody to change the way I sung. I learned by gospel CDs and by watching my momma sing; I didn't need this teacher to tell me. I wish I had, because then I would have learned how to play the damn piano or something. I would have a couple of more things under my belt if I wasn't so hard-headed. ~ Ester Dean

The momma bears are demanding, 'Protect our kids.' ~ Gene Ward

How he could sell the very stuff that took his momma from him? Did he realize that he was taking somebody else's momma from them? Did ~ Angie Thomas

Momma bear lookin' after my kids. Good woman lookin' after her man. ~ Kristen Ashley

Forget it once. *** Knock, knock! Who's there? Accordion! Accordion who? Accordion to the TV, it's going to rain tomorrow. *** Yo momma so stupid she tried to commit suicide by jumping off a building but got lost on the way down. *** Teacher: Why is the Mississippi such an unusual river? Student: Because it has four eyes and can't see! *** Teacher: "Why are you on the floor?" Johnny: "Because you said to do this math problem without tables!" *** How do you make an elephant float? Take one elephant, two tons of ice cream, and one ton of soda. Blend. *** In ~ Various

Bloodthirsty, thy name is Momma Wolf. ~ Carrie Ann Ryan

Hooka Tooka, my soda cracker, does your momma chaw tobacca? ~ Chubby Checker

Yo momma so ugly she makes onions cry. ~ Various

MODESTY My momma, your momma, gonna catch a witch My momma, your momma, flying on a switch My momma, your momma, witches never cry My momma, your momma, witches gonna die! As ~ J.K. Rowling

I bet you popped out of your momma with a gun in one hand and a doughnut in the other. ~ Rick Yancey

He turned to me, and do you know what he said to me ? He said in a deadly serious tone, 'Momma, am I dead?' And I said 'no honey, you're not dead', and he shook his head, looking all confused about something. Then he pointed to you dancing and said, 'if I'm not dead, then why is there an Angel in our house.' ~ Kirsty Moseley

It is a dangerous time to be a black woman in America. It's a time when we are not safe in the streets or at home or at school or at work and nobody seems to be able to do anything about it. Nobody. Not us. Not our mommas. Not the police. Not the people we elected to look out for our interests. Nobody. We're just out here. (p.53) ~ Pearl Cleage

Momma was with the pony last night. Lily and me have him in the mornings, and we give him a wash with the shammy cloths and a soapy bucket so he's ready for Jade to look after him the next night. I think Momma must ride him too rough because he's always sweating and white-eyed when we get him, pulling tight at his rope and spreading his wide beige lips. He won't settle forever and ever, he just turns circles around the stake. Me and Lily get nervy watching him paw scoops out of the backyard soil. ~ Kirsty Logan

How many ya'll parents smoke weed? My momma still grows illegal weed in Alabama. ~ Yelawolf

They rung my bell to ask me.
Could I recommend a maid.
I said, yes, your momma. ~ Langston Hughes

After dinner, we were all in the kitchen helping with the dishes, and I had the thought, Someone should go check on Momma. And that's when I started to cry. ~ Penny Reid

As I walked toward the front door, a little motion to the left caught my eye. Jenny Sells stood in the hallway, a silent wraith. She regarded me with luminous green eyes, like her mother's, like the dead aunt whose namesake she was. I stopped and faced her. I'm not sure why.
"You're the wizard," she said, quietly. "You're Harry Dresden. I saw your picture in the newspaper, once. The Arcane."
I nodded.
She studied my face for a long minute. "Are you going to help my mom?"
It was a simple question. But how do you tell a child that things just aren't that simple, that some questions don't have simple answers - or any answer at all?
I looked back into her too-knowing eyes, and then quickly away. I didn't want her to see what sort of person I was, the things I had done. She didn't need that. "I'm going to do everything I can to help your mom."
She nodded. "Do you promise?"
I promised her.
She thought that over for a moment, studying me. Then she nodded. "My daddy used to be one of the good guys, Mr. Dresden. But I don't think that he is anymore." Her face looked sad. It was a sweet, unaffected expression. "Are you going to kill him?"
Another simple question.
"I don't want to," I told her. "But he's trying to kill me. I might not have any choice."
She swallowed and lifted her chin. "I loved my Aunt Jenny," she said. Her eyes brightened with tears. "Momma won't say, and Billy's too little to figure it out, but I know what happen ~ Jim Butcher

I need her to come to me. If we have a chance at a future, I need her to come to me. I've always taken what I wanted and conquered my trials, but nothing and no one has ever meant what she does. I can't conquer her, Momma. I love her. I never want to make her do anything. Even love me. She has to love me all on her own. ~ Abbi Glines

Yo momma so fat her cereal bowl comes with a lifeguard. ~ Various

Despite what your momma told you, Violence does solve problems, ~ Chris Kyle

You do. Jordie Thomas is not a take-home-to-Momma kind of man." "No, he isn't," she agreed. "But he is a fuck-you-stupid kind of man. ~ Toni Aleo

I hope they're still making women like my momma. She always told me to do the right thing. She always told me to have pride in myself; she said a good name is better than money. ~ Joe Louis

Momma said that ghosts couldn't move over water. That's why Africans got trapped in the Americas.. They kept moving us over the water, stealing us away from our ghosts and ancestors, who cried salty rivers into the sand. That's where Momma was now, wailing at the water's edge, while her girls were pulled out of sight under white sails that cracked in the wind. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

I guess that's supposed to be deconstruction's original program, right? People have been under some sort of metaphysical anesthesia, so you dismantle the metaphysics' axioms and prejudices, show it in cross section and reveal the advantages of its abandonment. It's literally aggravating: you awaken them to the fact that they've been unconsciously imbibing some narcotic pharmakon since they were old enough to say "Momma."
-Interview with Larry McCaffery (1993) ~ David Foster Wallace

After momma gave birth to 12 of us kids, we put her up on a pedestal. It was mostly to keep Daddy away from her. ~ Dolly Parton

Momma, I could live with the idea. ~ Carolyn Brown

Blayne turned her head to look at Gwen, but caught sight of Dee-Ann standing behind them.
"Ahh! Where the hell did you come from?"
"Momma says from the love she shares with my daddy," Dee calmly replied. ~ Shelly Laurenston

I got my first guitar at age of 7 and never laid it down. Momma taught me G, C, and D. I was off to the races son! ~ Jerry Reed

Ricki Jo," Momma says, "who's on the phone? Tell them it's past your bedtime."
I cover the receiver and look over my shoulder at my folks. Right. 'Cause a ten o'clock bedtime is something I want to shout from the mountaintops. ~ Alecia Whitaker

As long as there's Big Momma, we're going to bring you comedy. ~ Martin Lawrence

Santa Claus was white and everything bad was black. The little ugly duckling was the black duck, and the black cat was the bad luck. And if I threaten you, I'm going to blackmail you.I said, 'Momma, why don't they call it 'whitemail'? They lie too.' ~ Muhammad Ali

If you listen to yo momma
You won't ever have no fun. ~ Chris Smither

They may look grown-up," she continued, "but it's a disguise. It's just the clay of time. Men and women are still children deep in their hearts. They still would like to jump and play, but that heavy clay won't let them. They'd like to shake off every chain the world's put on them, take off their watches and neckties and Sunday shoes and return naked to the swimming hole, if just for one day. They'd like to feel free, and know that there's a momma and daddy at home who'll take care of things and love them no matter what. Even behind the face of the meanest man in the world is a scared little boy trying to wedge himself into a corner where he can't be hurt. ~ Robert McCammon

Yo momma so ugly that when she was born the doctor looked at her butt, then at her face, and said, "Twins! ~ Various

That was his biggest regret. He loved playing for a
living, loved hearing his songs on the radio, loved being on a stage and the road, but some days, he wouldn't have minded going home every night to a sweet wife and a couple babies and fried chicken on the table. That was what Lindsey had taken from him. He'd fallen hard. He'd seen what his momma must've felt for his daddy, he'd felt his world crack right down the middle when the girl who had
become his everything ripped his heart out of his chest. ~ Jamie Farrell

Mina wanted some of the kind of love Momma gave to her children, where love was the first and deepest thing, and the questions came later and the answers wouldn't matter much measured up against the love. ~ Cynthia Voigt

138: Yo momma so stupid, she thought the bait at the Safari Zone was free food and the rocks were souvenirs ~ Pokemon Jokes

Nothing sexy," interjects Momma, the ever-present buzz skill. ~ Alecia Whitaker

Momma, a welfare cheater. A criminal who couldn't stand to se her kids go hungry, or grow up in slumbs and end up mugging people in dar corners. I guess the system didn't want her to get off relief, the way it kept sending social workers around to be sure Momma wasn't trying to make things better. ~ Dick Gregory

Daddy, Momma! I made a friend. His name is Ike, and he ain't got no tail because they chopped it off, but Aidan didn't cop it off. Tourists chopped it off. But then Aiden went and fought the tourist. I hope we don't get no tourists here. We would have to hide all the dogs. ~ Sophie Oak

God, He didn't write the scripts for the puny little players down
here.
We wrote them ourselves-with each day we lived, each word we spoke,
each thought we etched on our brains. And Momma had written her
script, too.
And a sorry one it was. ~ V.C. Andrews

She had a way about her that spoke of homemade bread, and caring for people, and the kind of patience that women have when they help a ewe birth a lamb, or stay up in the night with a baby calf bawling for its momma. ~ James Aura

Momma tried to raise me better, but her pleading I denied, and that leaves only me to blame, cause Momma tried. ~ Merle Haggard

PARODY OF "YOU'RE THE TOP" BY COLE PORTER
You're the pop
You're the baby's father
You're the pop
But you needn't bother
I will make no claim to your ancient name at all
When I let you make me
You promised you'd take me to the city hall
My mistake wasn't getting plastered,
What a break for the little b***stard
I was bad when I let you get on top
But if baby I'm the momma,
You're the pop!
[Sung by Elaine Stritch when interviewed by Michael Parkinson on YouTube. ~ Cole Porter

I love you," was his reply. "I make myself keep on loving you, despite what you do. I've got to love you. We all have to love you, and believe in
you, and think you are looking out for our best interests. But look at us, Momma, and really see us. ~ V.C. Andrews

And Burford needs a momma. ~ Kristen Ashley

So for fifteen years she'd been hiding her love for a man who had been hiding his love for her. That meant she'd betrayed the man who loved her. ~ Brent Weeks

Life's dangerous," Momma replied sharply. "Nobody gets out alive, last I checked. ~ Robert J. Crane

Yo' Momma, I'm a ghetto super star. ~ Ludacris

Everything I cook tastes better than yo' momma's nipples. ~ Coolio

Luke's momma had an impressive temper. All the Murrays had tempers, but Momma, she was another level entirely. She could rant at her husband and cook the evening meal, and whap her son upside the head all at the same time. ~ Sue Brown

And, Momma, if there is a separate heaven for gay people," Danny continued with a smile, "well, you'll just have to come visit." He raised his mother's chin gently with the side of his index finger, forcing her to look at him. "I hear it's on a rainbow, not a cloud, so at least you'll get some color. ~ Greg Hogben

Hi there! You're cute. Do you have any girlfriends? 'Cause Gran says Momma needs a man in her life. Then Pops says, 'Pfft, Martine, the last thing Elise needs is a man!' But I think my Gran is right."
"Rennie, for tonight, let's play the think-about-what-we-say-before-we-say-it-game. ~ Lauren Dane

Ten-year-old Bud is a motherless boy on the run, and his momma never told him who his father was. But she left a clue: posters of Herman E. Calloway and his famous band, the Dusky Devastators of the Depression!!!!!! Bud's got an idea that those posters will lead him to his father. Once he decides to hit the road and find this mystery man, nothing can stop him - not hunger, not cops, not vampires, not even Herman E. Calloway himself. ~ Christopher Paul Curtis

I want to remind all Africans, please come to Africa. It's right across the water. Come look at yourselves. Momma is waiting. ~ Geronimo Pratt

Mina thought to herself, watching, her momma was the kind of woman she wanted to be, wherever else she got to in her life. ~ Cynthia Voigt

Honey," she said, smiling so widely that I thought her face might split into two. "Are you about to make your momma proud? ~ J. Lynn

you're so ugly, your momma had to tie a pork chop around your neck so the dog would play with you ~ Bo Diddley

If I was sure, I'd say. For your Momma, maybe. For all of us, maybe, but I don't think so. I think, maybe, it's reaching out for that school. Somehow. I'm not saying that's what you thought you were doing or what you even wanted to do. But it's how it turned out. And I'm sorry, the way it turned out. Because somebody's slapped your hand back good and hard. But I don't want you to stop reaching, just because it didn't come out the way it should have. ~ Cynthia Voigt

I always wondered why you planted your roses outside the wall." (Ted)

"I didn't. Momma put 'em there before Daddy built the wall." (Myrtle)

"You're kidding? How long have they been there?"

"My guess would be 'round eighty years." Her eyes brightened. "The key is plenty of watering, pruning, and mulching."

"Oh, I know the hours you've spent with them."

"Cultivating relationships, Momma called it." Her smile widened. "They're like old friends. ~ Michael Knost

Bernice Pruitt: My dad says that childhood is the happiest time of my life. But, I think he's wrong. I think my mom's right. She says that...

[Bernice's voice fades as Birdee takes over]

Birdee Pruitt: [laughing] Childhood is what you spend the rest of your life trying to overcome. That's what momma always says. She says that beginnings are scary, endings are usually sad, but it's the middle that counts the most. Try to remember that when you find yourself at a new beginning. Just give hope a chance to float up. And it will, too... ~ Hope Floats

I burst. A firecracker July-the-Fourth burst. How could Momma call them Miz? The mean nasty things. Why couldn't she have come inside the sweet, cool store when we saw them breasting the hill? What did she prove? And then if they were dirty, mean and impudent, why did Momma have to call them Miz?

She stood another whole song through and then opened the screen door to look down on me crying in rage. She looked until I looked up. Her face was a brown moon that shone on me. She was beautiful. Something had happened out there, which I couldn't completely understand, but I could see that she was happy. Then she bent down and touched me as mothers of the church 'lay hands on the sick and afflicted' and I quieted.

'Go wash your face, Sister.' And she went behind the candy counter and hummed, 'Glory, glory, hallelujah, when I lay my burden down. ~ Maya Angelou

Brenda's pouting voice broke in, Your girl friend's dead, and Momma thought you was dead, too. ~ Katherine Paterson

All the while I was trying to figure out if I knew anyone who had married and stayed in love for decades. I thought about Daddy and Momma. Daddy had loved Momma with a great passion. Everyone knew that. But, why? I knew why! The ugly truth was that he loved her because of how she made him feel, not because of who she was. Was that the nature of a man's love for a woman? Not what you bring to the table, but how you make him feel? I was drinking a cup ~ Dorothea Benton Frank

You might be a redneck if your momma tore her best dress coon hunting. ~ Jeff Foxworthy

Once Momma left, Evelyn stared back out at the sky, where the sparkle of the first star emerged. As a child, she'd always thought the best wishing star was the first one to appear, but girlhood wishes had gotten her into a lot of trouble. Better to pray God would do as He pleased than make any wishes. ~ Melissa Jagears