Mitch Quotes

Mara," his arms gave me a squeeze, "baby, you've got to live in the now. Not in your head. Not controlled by your fears. You can't live for what might happen five months in the future. You got issues you gotta face today. You gotta deal with them now. You got two kids who count on you and their lives aren't gonna go perfect every day because you weigh every decision you make and tread cautiously. Those options are no longer available to you. You're gonna have to live day to day and make decisions on the fly. And I'm tellin' you I'm here to help. You need it and they need it. Are you honestly gonna say no? ~ Kristen Ashley

When I give my time, when I can make someone smile after they were feeling sad, it's as close to healthy as I ever feel.
Do the kinds of things that come from the heart. When you do, you won't be dissatisfied, you won't be envious, you won't be longing for somebody else's things. On the contrary, you'll be overwhelmed with what comes back. ~ Mitch Albom

Free-to-play isn't a business model. Free-to-play is a marketing strategy. It's a way to get people over the hump of trying out your game. It gets rid of the friction that happens when you charge an upfront fee. ~ Mitch Lasky

Pain is a companion, not a master. ~ Mitch Cullin

Whenever you have two characters in a book, whether it's a novel or nonfiction, you run the risk that the reader is going to like one more than the other. They're going to read one chapter and say, 'I can't wait to get back to the other guy.' ~ Mitch Albom

I think," I say, shifting my gaze to the ceiling so I don't have to experience the torment of saying this directly to another human being, "Mitch might … have … thoughts …"

It's right about here that I get tripped up.

"Um," Arthur says after a long time, "well. I think so too. I mean, I always assumed so. Maybe on occasion he doesn't precisely give off that vibe, but just because he's subtle about having thoughts doesn't mean - ~ Hannah Johnson

Everyone joins a band in this life. One way or another, the band breaks up. ~ Mitch Albom

What do you do when the dead return? It is the thing people most fear- yet, in some cases, most desire ~ Mitch Albom

We have a debt the size of our economy, which makes us look a lot like Greece. ~ Mitch McConnell

You only have peace when you make it with yourself. ~ Mitch Albom

The things you spend so much time on
all this work you do
might not seem as important. You might have to make room for some more spiritual things. ~ Mitch Albom

But her absence was like a character in it. ~ Mitch Albom

Never feel that you are alone, as someone is always be your side. ~ Mitch Kynock

You can't be in the tech community ... without realizing there's a big shortage of talent. ~ Mitch Kapor

Mr. Pibb is a poor imitation of Dr. Pepper. Dude didn't even get his degree. ~ Mitch Hedberg

Happiness in a tablet. This is our world. Prozac. Daxil. Xanax. Billions are spent to advertise such drugs. And billions are spent purchasing them. You don't even need a specific trauma, just 'general depression' is enough, or anxiety, as if sadness is as treatable as the common cold. ~ Mitch Albom

I think foosball is a combination of soccer and shish kabobs. ~ Mitch Hedberg

The president's grand experiment in trickle-down government has held back rather than sped economic recovery. He seems to sincerely believe we can build a middle class out of government jobs paid for with borrowed dollars. ~ Mitch Daniels

The old man asked again. "When I'm gone." His eyes blinked from behind his glasses. His neatly trimmed beard was gray, and he stood slightly stooped. Are you dying? I asked. "Not yet," he said, grinning. Then why - "Because I think you would ~ Mitch Albom

If you have to release bad news to the public, it would help if you are not ugly. ~ Mitch Hedberg

Syria and Iran have always had a pretty tight relationship, and it looks to me like they just cooked up a press release to put out to sort of restate the obvious. They're both problem countries; we know that. And this doesn't change anything. ~ Mitch McConnell

Come on 'long prosperous life!' ~ Mitch Hedberg

Look, if you say that science will eventually prove there is no God, on that I must differ. No matter how small they take it back, to a tadpole, to an atom, there is always something they can't explain, something that created it all at the end of the search.

"And no matter how far they try to go the other way – to extend life, play around with the genes, clone this, clone that, live to one hundred and fifty – at some point, life is over. And then what happens? When the life comes to an end?"

I shrugged.

"You see?"

He leaned back. He smiled.

"When you come to the end, that's where God begins. ~ Mitch Albom

Dor remembered Victor's voice.
And while they deepen with age, voices
are, to one destined to listen for eternity,
as distinct as a fingerprint. Dor knew it
was him the moment Victor spoke in the
shop. ~ Mitch Albom

The only thing scarier than leaving a small town is never leaving it at all. ~ Mitch Albom

Pepperidge Farm bread. That's fancy bread. You can tell it's fancy because it's wrapped twice. You open it, and it still isn't open. That's why I don't buy it. I don't need another step between me and toast. ~ Mitch Hedberg

All the quantum physics experiments have occurred chiefly on the atomic scale and we are taught to believe that nature's laws are consistent. ~ Mitch Horowitz

The minimum wage is mostly an entry-level wage for young people. ~ Mitch McConnell

I saw soda pop for $1.20 a six pack. That price messes with your head. You start thinking you're gonna sell soda pop. Suddenly I've got packs of pop with me. "Looking to buy some pop? 50 cents a can. It's not refrigerated because this is a half-assed commitment!" ~ Mitch Hedberg

If advertisers want to decorate their ads to increase their conversions by showing what users think, that's a good thing. ~ Mitch Kapor

The computer environment is radically different today. In the 1980s, it was like the Wild West, with a lot of open territory. Now, the cowboys have moved out and the farmers have moved in. ~ Mitch Kapor

Today, Democrats not only have the White House; they have the Senate too. So we have to be realistic about what we can and cannot achieve, while at the same recognizing that realism should never be confused with capitulation. ~ Mitch McConnell

Forgive yourself. Forgive others. Don't wait, Mitch. Not everyone gets the time I'm getting. Not everyone is as lucky." I ~ Mitch Albom

People are hungry for community. They're hungry for meaning in a society that is oriented around the production and consumption of consumer goods. ~ Mitch Kapor

EVERYONE JOINS A BAND IN THIS LIFE. You are born into your first one. Your mother plays the lead. She shares the stage with your father and siblings. Or perhaps your father is absent, an empty stool under a spotlight. But he is still a founding member, and if he surfaces one day, you will have to make room for him. As life goes on, you will join other bands, some through friendship, some through romance, some through neighborhoods, school, an army. Maybe you will all dress the same, or laugh at your own private vocabulary. Maybe you will flop on couches backstage, or share a boardroom table, or crowd around a galley inside a ship. But in each band you join, you will play a distinct part, and it will affect you as much as you affect it. And, as is usually the fate with bands, most of them will break up - through distance, differences, divorce, or death. ~ Mitch Albom

I thought about how often this was needed in everyday life. How we feel lonely, sometimes to the point of tears, but we don't let those tears come because we are not supposed to cry. ~ Mitch Albom

She had been so consumed with escaping her own misery, she hadn't considered the misery she might inflict. ~ Mitch Albom

I have to feel good about what I'm endorsing because I have to live with it. ~ Mitch Gaylord

She cared. She gave a crap. When I lacked even the self-respect to keep myself alive, she dabbed my cuts and I fell back into being a son; I fell as easily as you fall into your pillow at night. And I didn't want it to end. That's the best way I can explain it. I knew it was impossible. But I didn't want it to end. ~ Mitch Albom

Both VisiCalc and MultiPlan were available when the IBM PC shipped in October 1981. 1-2-3 didn't hit the market until January 1983. ~ Mitch Kapor

I went to the store and bought eight apples; the clerk said, "Do you want these in a bag?" I said, "Oh, no, man, I juggle." ~ Mitch Hedberg

History tends to play games with the truth, but at least it does so with a flourish. ~ Mitch Rowland

We designed both our state employee health plans and the one we created for low-income Hoosiers as Health Savings Accounts, and now in the tens of thousands these citizens are proving that they are fully capable of making smart, consumerist choices about their own health care. ~ Mitch Daniels

That's another thing that doesn't turn me off, sweetheart, knowin' that you come with those kids and you need to know that. You also need to know I want kids of my own, two of them. But I don't care, if this works out between me and you, that the kids we have will have an older brother and sister that don't have my blood, just my heart. ~ Kristen Ashley

And one day spent with someone you love can change everything. I ~ Mitch Albom

A dog came to my door, so I gave him a bone, the dog took the bone into the back yard and buried it. I'm going to go plant a tree there, with bones on it, then the dog will come back and say, "Shoot! It worked! I must distribute these bones equally for I have a green paw!" ~ Mitch Hedberg

He had been the pastor of Tate's church since Tate's boys were in high school
probably over ten years now. Tate thought he was a fair man with a good heart. It helped that his sermons were interesting and not fire and brimstone like the guy they'd had before him. Tate understood too well the repercussions of his sin. He went to church to hear about hope, to be encouraged. That was a thing Mitch seemed naturally born to
encouraging others. ~ Vannetta Chapman

As children grow, they gravitate to their fates. ~ Mitch Albom

>>How old were you when you had your first kiss?
>>Twenty. It's pathetic. Guys don't want to kiss fat girls.
>>Not true. There are all those guys on jerry springer, and there's president Clinton...
>>Make that: no one I ever wanted to kiss wanted to kiss a fat girl.
>>I'll bet you never gave anyone a chance. Mitch says you practically beat him away with a stick.
>>I was trying to spare him. ~ Rainbow Rowell

Fate succumbs many a species: one alone jeopardises itself. - W. H. AUDEN, ~ Mitch Albom

Linden Lab's technological breakthroughs have made 'Second Life' a truly revolutionary experience. ~ Mitch Kapor

I want to be a race car passenger: just a guy who bugs the driver. Say man, can I turn on the radio? You should slow down. Why do we gotta keep going in circles? Can I put my feet out the window? Man, you really like Tide.. ~ Mitch Hedberg

Companies with aspirations to be larger publishers - Kabam, Kixeye, even Zynga - are moving aggressively off the Facebook platform to mobile and the open Web. Publishers aren't convinced that the costs of being on Facebook are worth it. ~ Mitch Lasky

This is life. Things get taken away. You will learn to start over many times
or you will be useless. ~ Mitch Albom

There was always a quest for more minutes, more hours, faster progress to accomplish more in each day. The simple joy of living between summers was gone. ~ Mitch Albom

It took us in this country 11 years to get from the Declaration of Independence to the Constitution. ~ Mitch McConnell

The reason kids like rock 'n roll is their parents don't. ~ Mitch Miller

For every 100 women who earn a bachelors degree, 75 men do so. For every 100 American women who earn a Masters degree, 66 American men do so. For every 100 females, ages 20 to 24, who commit suicide, 624 males do so. For every 100 women, ages 18 to 21, in correctional facilities, 1430 men are so confined. ~ Mitch Pearlstein

She kissed Mitch on the forehead. Hello, pretty kitty. ~ Shelly Laurenston

I think about the time Mitch asked me why I was such a happy little guy. I was five years old. Pearl had been gone a few weeks. I thought really hard for an answer even though I think he'd gone about his business without expecting one.
Then I said, "I think it's because my mother loves me so much."
He gave me this look of utter pity, like I was the bravest kid in the world. He missed the point completely, you know? ~ Catherine Ryan Hyde

At that moment i felt lonelier than i'd ever felt before, and that loneliness seemed to squat in my lungs and crush all but my most minimal breathing. There was nothing left to say. Not about this. Not about anything. ~ Mitch Albom

I think some of our members may have thought the default issue was a hostage you might take a chance at shooting. Most of us didn't think that. What we did learn is this - it's a hostage that's worth ransoming. And it focuses the Congress on something that must be done. ~ Mitch McConnell

And thus, unknowingly, did Dor begin to serve his sentence - to hear every plea from every soul who desired more of the thing he had first identified, the thing that moved man further from the simple light of existence and deeper into the darkness of his own obsessions. Time. It seemed to be running too fast for everyone but him. ~ Mitch Albom

Do not stop your lives. Otherwise, this disease will have ruined three of us instead of one. ~ Mitch Albom

I am not one of the "slower" talents, like Reason or Mathematics. I am Music. If I bless you singing, you can do so from your first attempt. ~ Mitch Albom

Not exactly what the world was looking for, a musical on 'Don Quixote.' It was required reading in high school. ~ Mitch Leigh

Among the weeds choking out growth and good government are the hundreds of boards, commissions, and advisory committees that have sprouted over the years. They devour time, money, and energy far beyond any real contribution they make. ~ Mitch Daniels

Accept what you are able to do and what you are not able to do. Accept the past as past, without denying it or discarding it. Learn to forgive yourself and to forgive others. Don't assume that it's too late to get involved. ~ Mitch Albom

True utility happens in the moment of need. Not the brand's moment of need, but the consumer's moment of need. If you can meet that need when the customer needs it met, you are on to something big. ~ Mitch Joel

E-mail is a victim of its own success. ~ Mitch Kapor

To a fault, Ann has always been a very sensitive, trusting woman. It's as if she was born to feel and experience the world more acutely than the rest of us. It is both her greatest strength and weakness; if recognized by someone with devious intentions, this delicate quality can be easily exploited... ~ Mitch Cullen

A severed foot is the ultimate stocking stuffer. ~ Mitch Hedberg

I would not want to be a mobile home repo man. Those would be hard to sneak away - "Knock knock - Hi, would you go cut your grass and look that way for a half an hour?" ~ Mitch Hedberg

Mitt Romney has never been resigned to what someone else said was possible. He cut his own path. That's why he believes in his heart that America has a future full of opportunity and hope. And that's why when Mitt Romney looks down the road, he sees a country that's ready for a comeback. ~ Mitch McConnell

The way you get meaning into life is to devote yourself to loving others, devote yourself to creating something that gives you purpose and meaning. (43) ~ Mitch Albom

Things that happen before you are born still affect you and people who come before your time affect you as well. ~ Mitch Albom

Cavities are made by sugar. So if you need to dig a hole, then lay down some candy bars! ~ Mitch Hedberg

You'll regret this, and you may regret this a lot sooner than you think. ~ Mitch McConnell

No life is a waste . ~ Mitch Albom

With endless time, nothing is special. With no loss or sacrifice, we can't appreciate what we have ~ Mitch Albom

It's August, which means Congress is on recess and Mitch McConnell has shimmied back into the ocean to seek a mate. ~ Stephen Colbert

When he smiles it's as if you'd just told him the first joke on earth. ~ Mitch Albom

The main languages out of which web applications are built - whether it's Perl or Python or PHP or any of the other languages - those are all open source languages. So the infrastructure of the web is open source ... the web as we know it is completely dependent on open source. ~ Mitch Kapor

Only an open heart will allow you to float equally between people. ~ Mitch Albom

More young people believe they'll see a U.F.O. than that they'll see their own Social Security benefits. ~ Mitch McConnell

That's always disappointed me, to see a guy in the crowd who doesn't look like he's having fun but in general if you just listen to the crowd it sounds like they're having fun. So I don't want to focus on the one guy who's not having fun. And by closing my eyes and just listening, I can't hear that he's not laughing but I can see that he's not laughing. ~ Mitch Hedberg

New York is really the cheapest ad market. When I go on TV, I'm hitting a country. The market is as big as some countries, you know. ~ Mitch Leigh

What is false about hope? ~ Mitch Albom

I ordered a club sandwich, but I'm not even a member. "I like my sandwiches with three pieces of bread." "Well, so do I!" "Then let's form a club." "OK, but we need some more stipulations. Instead of cutting the sandwich once, let's cut it again. Yes, four triangles, arranged in a circle, and in the middle we will dump chips." "How do you feel about frilly toothpicks?" "I'm for 'em!" "Well, this club is formed." ~ Mitch Hedberg

is satisfying, not frightening, not empty. It is an illusion of reality created by ignorance that is so unbearable. The illusion of separateness, the illusion of connectedness to disconnected hardened hearts and closed minds is the source of the suffering that we would all wish to be free of. ~ Mitch Halper

If I was a locksmith, I'd be pimping that out man. I'll trade you a free key duplication for. That joke made me laugh before I could finish it, which is good, because it had no ending. ~ Mitch Hedberg

He listened as if you were the person in the world. ~ Mitch Albom

Open source can propagate to fill all the nooks and crannies that people want it to fill. ~ Mitch Kapor

I'm always on the road, and I drive rental cars. Sometimes I don't know what's going on with the car, and I'll drive for ten miles with the emergency brake on. That doesn't say a lot for me, but it doesn't say a lot for the emergency brake. What kind of emergency is this? I need to not stop now. It's not really an emergency brake, it's an emergency make-the-car-smell-funny lever. ~ Mitch Hedberg

We all know that Social Security is one of this country's greatest success stories in the 20th century. ~ Mitch McConnell

I tell people that the history of Mozilla and Firefox is so one of a kind that it should not be used - ever - as an example of what's possible. ~ Mitch Kapor

At I Am My Brother's Keeper, there were no dues, no drives, no singles nights. Membership grew the old-fashioned way: a desperate need for God. ~ Mitch Albom

What in life can love not penetrate? ~ Mitch Albom

I was on a bus once, it was in the middle of the night, and I had a box of crackers and a can of Easy Cheese. It was dark, and it was a surprise how much cheese I had applied on each cracker. That's why they should have a glow-in-the-dark version of Easy Cheese. It's not like the product has any integrity to begin with. If you buy a room-temperature cheese that you squeeze out of a can, you probably won't get mad because it glows in the dark too. ~ Mitch Hedberg

On the issue of Iraq, it is my hope, and my challenge to my colleagues, that our debate will be based on what is best for the future of our nation and for Iraq, not what's best for a political party or presidential campaign. ~ Mitch McConnell