Lgbt Humor Quotes

Collection of famous quotes and sayings about Lgbt Humor.

Quotes About Lgbt Humor

Enjoy collection of 45 Lgbt Humor quotes. Download and share images of famous quotes about Lgbt Humor. Righ click to see and save pictures of Lgbt Humor quotes that you can use as your wallpaper for free.

If cheese was a woman, I'd marry her. I'd come home and eat her every night. ~ Solange Nicole
Lgbt Humor quotes by Solange Nicole
The past haunts the present in more ways than we think. It certainly scares the living daylights out of ME"~ Old Wrinkly ~ Cressida Cowell
Lgbt Humor quotes by Cressida Cowell
It probably wasn't smart to judge them based on appearance. I, for instance, was destined to be a world-renowned surgeon, but between my long, brown braid, square-framed glasses, and boyish figure, I looked more like the kind of girl who works in a library and spends Friday nights having deep, meaningful conversations with her cats. ~ Carrie Harris
Lgbt Humor quotes by Carrie Harris
I made a tactical error tonight with Wyatt." She paused "Horizontally."
Sara laughed. "Again? ~ Jill Shalvis
Lgbt Humor quotes by Jill Shalvis
Why do I have to feed the kids? They just ate twelve hours ago! ~ Bill Cosby
Lgbt Humor quotes by Bill Cosby
Tayla cursed under her breath. "I was just explaining to Eidolon that Sin is a Smurfette."
Wraith swung his big body around to study Sin with blue eyes that were very different from Shade's, E's. and Lore's. Sin's, too. "Nah. Smurfette is way hotter."
"What the fuck is a Smurfette?" Eidolon was seriously getting annoyed now.
"There's this cartoon called The Smurfs," Tayla explained, slowly, as though Eidolon were the child here.
"They're these little blue people, and they're all male. But one day a female shows up. She shouldn't exist, but she does."
Eidolon considered that for a second. "How did she get there?"
"An evil wizard named Gargamel made her," Tayla said. "In a lab or something."
"So you're suggesting that an evil wizard made Sin?"
"Of course not, silly. I'm just saying she's a Smurfette. A lone female amongst males."
Eidolon frowned. "Did the Smurfette mate with the males?"
"Dude." Wraith grimaced. "It's a cartoon. ~ Larissa Ione
Lgbt Humor quotes by Larissa Ione
This supreme instance of Troy's goodness fell upon Gabriel's ears like the thirteenth stroke of a crazy clock. ~ Thomas Hardy
Lgbt Humor quotes by Thomas Hardy
One should never make one's debut with a scandal. One should reserve that to give an interest to one's old age. ~ Oscar Wilde
Lgbt Humor quotes by Oscar Wilde
Men drive off bridges and drink too much because of women like you. ~ Janet Evanovich
Lgbt Humor quotes by Janet Evanovich
In the sciences, looking good was usually a negative. It implied you wasted time on outdoor activities instead of building something useful. Even using hair product or makeup implied misguided priorities. Like you thought how things looked mattered, instead of how they worked. We liked to look at attractive people. We expected it of our movie stars and TV characters. But we did not respect it. We knew physical attractiveness was inversely correlated with intelligence, because look at us. ~ Max Barry
Lgbt Humor quotes by Max Barry
Why, Jack-off ... You actually have a sense of humor! You should share that playful side more often. Guys really go for it. ~ Lorelei James
Lgbt Humor quotes by Lorelei James
Mysteries force a man to think, and so injure his health. ~ Edgar Allan Poe
Lgbt Humor quotes by Edgar Allan Poe
Ohmigod! This place is so cool!" This was Tracy, who was sashaying into the warehouse looking around like she just hit the candy garden with chocolate stream at Willy Wonka's. Her eyes caught site of Elvira who was in the kitchen. "Hey girl! What's up?"
"Job satisfaction, beanpole, what's up with you," Elvira replied on a huge smile thus taking the sting out of her nickname for Tracy (I hoped).
If Cam was yin to Tracy's yang, Elvira was yang to all of our yins. ~ Kristen Ashley
Lgbt Humor quotes by Kristen Ashley
If you ever wanted to take a run at it, I'd say now's your time. There's hardly any competition, unless you count me. Though I am of course very handsome, even dead. ~ Amie Kaufman
Lgbt Humor quotes by Amie Kaufman
There are two philosophies when it comes to getting young children to sleep. There is 'sleep training,' which basically involves putting your kids to bed and listening to them scream all night; or there is 'attachment parenting,' which essentially involves lying down with your kids, cuddling them, and then listening to them scream all night. ~ Jim Gaffigan
Lgbt Humor quotes by Jim Gaffigan
This column was an attempt to convey to British readers something of the flavor of high-school graduation, a ritual largely unknown across the Atlantic and one at odds with the basic organizing principle of English education: The continual assurances by commencement speakers that yours is the most awesome generation ever to walk the earth ring a little odd if you're a survivor of some grim Dotheboys Hall where the prevailing educational philosophy was to lower your self-esteem to undetectable levels by the end of the first week. ~ Mark Steyn
Lgbt Humor quotes by Mark Steyn
Humor is about perspective, and hanging out with people who see life through a similar lens is so important. ~ Mariska Hargitay
Lgbt Humor quotes by Mariska Hargitay
I have to admit," I said when he finished a lengthy discussion on the types of drivers, "I've been golfing and it's about the most boring thing I've ever done. Old men drive around in golf carts pretending they're sporty and getting grouchy if there's any noise. It's like the nursing-home Olympics."
Nick's mouth dropped open. "It takes great athletic ability to know how to aim and drive the ball that far."
"I get more exercise shopping at the mall," I joked. "I don't come home and tell everyone I won at shopping." Although those red shoes I got on sale the other day felt like a win. ~ Cindi Madsen
Lgbt Humor quotes by Cindi Madsen
Talk is cheap. Show me the code. ~ Linus Torvalds
Lgbt Humor quotes by Linus Torvalds
When I left home, my mum said "Don't forget to write", I thought, "That's unlikely" ... It's a basic skill isn't it ... ~ Tim Vine
Lgbt Humor quotes by Tim Vine
If only he had more humor, more life in him; that was what was needed here. Grim places needed lightening, not solemnity, ~ George R R Martin
Lgbt Humor quotes by George R R Martin
But if you don't watch me, I will try and sneak in some humor. I see humor everywhere in life around me. ~ Marion Ross
Lgbt Humor quotes by Marion Ross
The men began to trade tales of atrocities, first stories they had heard, then those they'd witnessed, and finally the things that had happened to themselves. A litany of personal humiliation, outrage, and anger turned sicklelike back to themselves as humor. They laughed then, uproariously, about the speed with which they had run, the pose they had assumed, the ruse they had invented to escape or decrease some threat to their manliness, their humanness. All but Empire State, who stood, broom in hand and drop-lipped, with the expression of a very intelligent ten-year-old. ~ Toni Morrison
Lgbt Humor quotes by Toni Morrison
He was a gentle and sensitive soul, and therefore had a short temper, which is why he went straight after everything with an ax ... ~ Bohumil Hrabal
Lgbt Humor quotes by Bohumil Hrabal
Never before have the tools of value creation been so great and the potential artisans so busy watching the Kardashians. ~ Ryan Lilly
Lgbt Humor quotes by Ryan Lilly
The tune was wailing and mournful, almost flagrantly so, and the total effect was of a heartbroken piccolo being parted forever from its bagpipe lover. ~ Peter S. Beagle
Lgbt Humor quotes by Peter S. Beagle
Beauty, grace, and charm my foot. It's a school for sadists with good tea-serving skills. ~ Libba Bray
Lgbt Humor quotes by Libba Bray
You are so lost to your higher self that you would resent me for my achievements, rather than celebrate them with me, sexually? ~ Ayn Rand
Lgbt Humor quotes by Ayn Rand
It s amazing that the amount of news that happens in the world every day always just exactly fits the newspaper. ~ Jerry Seinfeld
Lgbt Humor quotes by Jerry Seinfeld
Nonsense Bella, it was all a misunderstanding. We just need to talk about it."
Her stunned amazement quickly gave way to anger. "I don't think I misunderstood that twenty- something coed riding you like a pony!" She nearly shouted.
"Bella, I am sorry about that, she caught me in a moment of weakness and she wouldn't take no for an answer. What was I supposed to do? I am a guy after all. ~ Melissa Hale
Lgbt Humor quotes by Melissa Hale
This was the move that was supposed to sweep me away. She seemed a little out of practice. I guess life with Charley Royce hadn't exactly been the third reel of The English Patient. It had to be bad if Mickey Dolan was your back-up. Not to put Mickey down but he didn't strike me as the lover-boy type. Especially when he took out his teeth. The last time Mickey thought about pleasing anybody but himself was just before he discovered how to sniff glue. ~ Dan Ahearn
Lgbt Humor quotes by Dan Ahearn
The sarcasm made a slight whistling noise as it flew over Loafers' head. ~ Eoin Colfer
Lgbt Humor quotes by Eoin Colfer
Tequila--a sure cure for monogamy. ~ Lois Greiman
Lgbt Humor quotes by Lois Greiman
Nature has a lot to offer.But she finds her self in a cruel world.That is why there is misunderstanding and you have your share.So am not suprised. ~ Emmanel Oppong
Lgbt Humor quotes by Emmanel Oppong
Did you ever see anybody so disgusting: said lightning to thunder, "never," growled thunder, "let's give him the works. ~ William Steig
Lgbt Humor quotes by William Steig
The real fact is that I could no longer stand their eternal cold mutton. ~ Cecil Rhodes
Lgbt Humor quotes by Cecil Rhodes
Don't forget Mother's Day. Or as they call it in Beverly Hills, Dad's third wife Day. ~ Jay Leno
Lgbt Humor quotes by Jay Leno
I could not be a zombie. They had no thoughts. Their brains were gruel. They said little beyond "Brrr!" unable, even, to articulate completely what they sought.
"Brains,"I said distinctly. "And I feel no burning urge to partake of any." Forsooth, the idea sent a wave of nausea through me. Therefore I was not a zombie. ~ Lori Handeland
Lgbt Humor quotes by Lori Handeland
Once we've got you properly done up," her aunt said, "and he hears of your newfound wealth, he's sure to look your way again."
"I don't want him looking my way again. He was a pompous twit back then, and he's a pompous twit now."
"Respectable, God-fearing men sometimes are, dear. ~ Sabrina Jeffries
Lgbt Humor quotes by Sabrina Jeffries
Eyeing me playfully, he tossed a rock back and forth between his hands. Was that an accident, or do you have a wet t-shirt competition you need me to get you ready for? ~ Devon Ashley
Lgbt Humor quotes by Devon Ashley
You have no idea how crazy I am, I should be wearing yellow Caution tape, I'm that bonkers. ~ Robin Benway
Lgbt Humor quotes by Robin Benway
Among our articles of lazy hardware, I recommend the faucet that stops dripping when no one is listening to it. ~ Marcel Duchamp
Lgbt Humor quotes by Marcel Duchamp
I thought you were makin' small talk about the weather."
"When have I ever made small talk with you?"
"When we first met."
"No, I made small talk with Bessie, your shotgun, until you removed her double barrels from my kisser."
Violet and a typical conversation with Harvey ~ Ann Charles
Lgbt Humor quotes by Ann Charles
So, okay. He was basically an amalgamation of every redheaded man to ever turn my crank (and how!). And he lived in a popular gay resort town, which meant the chances were above average that he might actually be interested. Watching him trot lightly down those stairs to the beach, I realized what my objective this summer would be.
Agent Carlisle, your mission, should you choose to accept it, will be to find out which of these residences belongs to Mr. Strawberry-Blond Hunka Burnin' Love and convince him to do you on every horizontal surface - and against a few of the vertical ones. ~ Amelia C. Gormley
Lgbt Humor quotes by Amelia C. Gormley
We learn from history that we learn nothing from history. ~ George Bernard Shaw
Lgbt Humor quotes by George Bernard Shaw
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