Jen Schwalbach Quotes

Like its author, this book is dedicated to Jen Schwalbach - the gorgeous mother of my child, the seductive temptress who keeps me faithful, and the friend I've always had the most fun with. My best friend, even.
Also quite like the author, this book is additionally dedicated to Jen Schwalbach asshole.
Everything above also applies here, obviously, except the "mother of my child" part: referencing my kid and my wife's brown eye in the same sentiment might come off as crude or something.
(And I have a heart: Please don't go telling my kid you read in her old man's book that she's some kinda Butt-Baby. She's gonna have a hard enough time being Silent Bob's daughter - the daughter of the "Too Fat to Fly" guy.
Also: Pleas don't tell my daughter I dedicated tge vook to her mother's sphincter. That'd be weird) ~ Kevin Smith

A huge smile spread across Jen's face."Ahh that was a good one." She turned back to the crowed and yelled again."Rewind. We're going to party like it's 2009, New Year's Eve. If you're curious as to how awesome a party that was, please see me, Jacque or Sally. Sally's version will be much more accurate, and also free of any important inappropriate details." Before she could say anything else, a large hand wrapped around the microphone and pulled it from Jen's grasp. Decebel handed it to Jacque as he growled at his mate and pulled her away.All the while Jen was telling him exactly how much she didn't appreciate him getting all up in her kool aide. She finished by telling him that, once again, she was going to shove her foot where an 'Exit Only' sign should be.

Jen to the audience and Decebel in Beyond The Veil ~ Quinn Loftis

Annual U.S. spending on cosmetics: $8 billion Basic education for all global children: $6 billion Annual U.S. and European spending on perfume: $12 billion Clean water for all global citizens $9 billion ~ Jen Hatmaker

Once you know what you want, narrow the options, make your choices, and go for it. But until you do, embrace not knowing. ~ Jen Doll

When you lose your temper, she has always said, you lose credibility. ~ Jen Larsen

This is really a tough choice," Peri grumbled. "I can either live in estrogen city or testosterone valley." She looked from the men to the women and then stepped towards the females. "But at least in estrogen city there will be chocolate and Jen to keep me entertained." Jen grinned. "We aim to please Peri fairy. ~ Quinn Loftis

You are the gatekeeper to your life and your home. You get to decide who or what comes in and what needs to stay out. If it doesn't contribute to the peaceful home you are now trying to have, then it should stay out. ~ Jen Grice

Setting the flowers, roots and all, aside, Millie crossed her arms over her chest. Don't insult my intelligence, Everett. You wouldn't be bringing me flowers or children if something of a disastrous nature hadn't occurred. ~ Jen Turano

If I have a choice, I'd rather believe in our own fairytales than in their fabrications. ~ Jen Minkman

Forgiveness is all about taking care of you, not the person you need to forgive. It's about putting your desire to feel good before your desire to be right. It's about taking responsibility for your own happiness instead of pretending it's in somebody else's hands. It's about owning your power by giving all your anger, resentment, and hurt the heave-ho. ~ Jen Sincero

Decebel looked over at Fane. "A face tu fiecare a lua ce ei say?(Do you ever get what they say?)"
Fane smiled at his Beta. "Nu mai incerce sa, (No longer try)."
"Good call." Decebel nodded.
Jen looked over at Decebel, her eyes narrowing. "No talking in foreign tongue when around the Americans."
Decebel leaned towards her, the gleam in his eyes causing Jen to tremble. "But Jennifer, I thought you spoke Romanian." He looked around at Sally and Jacque. "Weren't you two under the impression that she spoke Romanian?"
Jacque and Sally nodded despite the daggers Jen was staring their way.
"That was thoroughly impressed upon us, wouldn't you say, Sally?" Jacque turned to look at her.
"Wait. Uh yeah, I distinctly remember a bar...vodka...and I'm almost positive Jen speaking in Romanian to the hot bartender."
Sally was grinning from ear to ear as Jen's face grew red.
"I hope you two aren't attached to your undergarments because I just got the sudden urge to have a bonfire," Jen growled out.
"Note to self: hide underwear."
"Or you could just solve that problem by not wearing any." Jacque heard Fane's voice through their bond. Her jaw dropped open and her face turned bright red as she turned to look at her mate.
Jen looked at Sally. "Looks like Fane had a suggestion about the princess' undergarments. If I had my guess, I'd say he told her I couldn't burn them if she didn't own any."
If Jacque could've turned any redder she ~ Quinn Loftis

Would you please just talk to me? Please?" Sally's voice was beginning to take on a high-pitched whine.
"Oh, good grief. For the love of healthy ears everywhere, quit your belly aching," Jen snapped, the clothes in her hands growing more wrinkled by the second. "Sally, there is nothing to talk about, okay? It is what it is."
Sally threw her hands up in the air as she exhaled loudly. "No, it is not what it is, whatever the hell that means. It's a whole freaking lot more complicated than 'it is what it is'. ~ Quinn Loftis

if you get very clear on what you truly want (rather than what you think you should want), believe that it's available to you regardless of your present circumstances by staying connected to Source Energy and keeping your frequency high, and take decisive action, you will eventually succeed. Have ~ Jen Sincero

Stewardship is like that. I won't answer for the way another Christian mismanaged money. I won't be charged with another person's irresponsible consumption. Nor will I get credit for how another faith community shared or sacrificed luxuries for the marginalized. I'll answer for my choices. ~ Jen Hatmaker

With the mere click of a mouse, I can be put in my place but good via Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Tumblr, Pinterest, or Google+, just to name a few. (But not MySpace, which has been a ghost town since 2008. I hope Tom's okay.) ~ Jen Lancaster

The mountain range ahead of her was remote and imposing. Maybe that was where Grand Pabbie was! In the distance, the rocky face of the North Mountain loomed, large and impressive. Even in the summer, the peak was covered in snow. Few had attempted to climb it, which meant no one would follow her up there. The mountain was a kingdom of isolation, and it looked like she was the queen. She'd keep going in that direction until she found the trolls or her legs gave out. She wasn't even tired. And the cold never bothered her, anyway. ~ Jen Calonita

Before we go in here, I should probably warn you about my sisters."
"Your sisters come with a warning? ~ Jen Turano

Motioned for her to follow. "Uh-hu and so if Katie Peri's E.T. suddenly started playing, you wouldn't have the sudden urge to de-robe?" "Urge, yes," Jen admitted. "I mean, come on, the song has a sick beat. ~ Quinn Loftis

If Jesus made the sanctuary free and available for all, we should too. If the savior of the world decided that demarkations and hierarchies and power players were no longer necessary to the health of his church, then who are we to reinstate a ranking system after Jesus rendered it obsolete? ~ Jen Hatmaker

A few moments later, a group of white birds landed on the steps to watch her. "Hello there!" she said and removed some birdseed from her pocket, laying it on the steps for them to eat. When they were finished, they stayed to watch her work. She didn't mind. It helped to have company, even if they couldn't talk. She found herself talking to them sometimes. True, some might call her mad for conversing with animals, but who was paying attention? ~ Jen Calonita

For a split second, Elsa recalled a new memory of her younger self. She was building a snowman with another girl. They pulled the snowman around the room laughing. It was clear they loved each other. Her hands started to tingle in an unfamiliar way- they were warm- then the sensation was gone and she was left with a sharp headache.
What was that? she wondered. The girl had to be in her imagination. She had never used magic before that week. Had she?
Elsa stood up, her legs shaking. She held on to her bed frame to keep from falling. Heart pounding, fingers aching, she closed her eyes again and tried to remember the love she had just felt coursing through her veins. The emotion was stronger than fear. This feeling had come from building something out of love- a snowman for the two girls to enjoy. ~ Jen Calonita

I don't think reading is a pleasure I'll ever be able to abandon. ~ Jen Turano

What if all my silly little individual purchases do matter? What if I joined a different movement, one that was less enticed by luxuries and more interested in justice? What if I believed every dollar spent is vital, a potential soldier in the war on inequality? ~ Jen Hatmaker

It's just as easy to believe we're awesome as it is to believe we're giant sucking things. ~ Jen Sincero

Grand Pabbie was right- love can really thaw any curse," Kristoff said.
"Love can thaw..." Elsa repeated. "Of course!"
All that time she had allowed herself to be wrapped up in fear- fear of being alone, fear of never finding Anna, fear of destroying the kingdom with her powers. That fear had held her prisoner since she had learned she had magic inside her. It was just as Grand Pabbie had said: she needed to learn to control her magic. If only she embraced the beauty in her life and the magic she'd been gifted- gifted, not cursed with!- then she could move mountains. ~ Jen Calonita

Being in a band is just like being married. The children are the songs and the sex is playing live onstage. ~ Jen Sincero

You know what? We need a recession in this country, because that would finally weed out all the subnormal, underdeveloped, stupefied, puerile people in this workforce. ~ Jen Lancaster

we're using our freedoms to break the bonds of community, which have long held us together. ~ Jen Pollock Michel

Ironically, we practically have to be sainted to get through the adoption process, but any fool can spawn and have a baby, tra la la. ~ Jen Hatmaker

Can she smell him? Penn wonders, and thinks she is wild, though she's skinny and plain. A wild and unremarkable thing. ~ Jen Castleberry

When the jars of clay remember they are jars of clay, the treasure within gets all the glory, which seems somehow more fitting. ~ Jen Hatmaker

CUSTOMER: Which was the first Harry Potter book?
BOOKSELLER: The Philosopher's Stone.
CUSTOMER: And the second?
BOOKSELLER: The Chamber of Secrets.
CUSTOMER: I'l take The Chamber of Secrets. I don't want The Philosopher's Stone.
BOOKSELLER: Have you already read that one?
CUSTOMER: No, but with series of books I always find they take a while to really get going. I don't want to waste my time with the useless introductory stuff at the beginning.
BOOKSELLER: The story in Harry Potter actually starts right away. Personally, I do recommend that you start with the first book – and it's very good.
CUSTOMER: Are you working on commission?
BOOKSELLER: No.
CUSTOMER: Right. How many books are there in total?
BOOKSELLER: Seven.
CUSTOMER: Exactly. I'm not going to waste my money on the first book when there are so many others to buy. I'l take the second one.
BOOKSELLER: . . . If you're sure.
(One week later, the customer returns)
BOOKSELLER: Hi, did you want to buy a copy of The Prisoner of Azkaban?
CUSTOMER: What's that?
BOOKSELLER: It's the book after The Chamber of Secrets.
CUSTOMER: Oh, no, definitely not. I found that book far too confusing. I ask you, how on earth are children supposed to understand it if I can't? I mean, who the heck is that Voldemort guy anyway? No. I'm not going to bother with the rest.
BOOKSELLER: . . . ~ Jen Campbell

If you're in the midst of a midlife crisis, you could buy a convertible, have an affair, or upgrade your cup size. But you'll probably be happiest if you save a dog's life. ~ Jen Lancaster

Many believers get together to discuss a great book and mistakenly call it Bible study. That is, in fact, a book club with a spiritual theme. ~ Jen Hatmaker

The fact that you are currently inhaling and exhaling at this very moment means that you are a recipient of mercy. ~ Jen Wilkin

Now it's my turn to be offended. "You said it was a study group."

"And you believed me?"

"Why wouldn't I?" Hell, maybe I shouldn't venture outside the Gas Station. It's too complex out here. "This is college, and study groups do exist. A lot. College is to study groups as libraries are to books. They go together. ~ Jen Frederick

I had reason to be wary of Rowan Gresham.

Crazy doesn't always look crazy.

Sometimes it looks like the most handsome and refined gentleman ever encountered in one's short life. ~ Jen Crane

Is this where you tell me God moves in mysterious ways, or something to that effect?" Gilbert asked?

Reverend Perry's eyes twinkled. "I have no idea what God was thinking with this one, Gilbert. But it's not my place to question. I simply accept the results, and what we're witnessing now, my dear friend, are wonderful results. ~ Jen Turano