Humor Reading Poem Quotes

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I was reading the dictionary. I thought it was a poem about everything. ~ Steven Wright
Humor Reading Poem quotes by Steven Wright
Literature offers us a different way of seeing things. The reading of literature opens our eyes, offering us new perspectives on things that we can evaluate and adopt. My own eyes are not enough for me, I will see through those of others. . . . In reading great literature, I become a thousand men and yet remain myself. Like the night sky in the Greek poem, I see with a myriad eyes, but it is still I who see.[94] ~ Alister E. McGrath
Humor Reading Poem quotes by Alister E. McGrath
I wanted to write something that made no linear sense. None. Zero. Something that was 87% pure nonsense, 12% pure alcohol, and 3% orange juice, for a chaser. That formula is accurate, give or take 2% for the milk. In my experience, comedy is 2/3rds tragedy, and one third 33.3 percent. And tragedy started at birth, so humor involving babies is probably the funniest. But even though I didn't write anything about babies, you might laugh so hard that you'll regret not wearing a diaper while reading. ~ Jarod Kintz
Humor Reading Poem quotes by Jarod Kintz
She 'didn't care much for reading', she said. Books were just a commodity that had to be produced, like jam or bootlaces. ~ George Orwell
Humor Reading Poem quotes by George Orwell
The more you read, the better you get at it; the better you get at it, the more you like it;
and the more you like it, the more you do it.
And the more you read, the more you know;
and the more you know, the smarter you grow. ~ Jim Trelease
Humor Reading Poem quotes by Jim Trelease
He had been inspired to start a career in the porn industry after reading the incredible tale of a Japanese man who avenged the death of his sister by going down on her best friend for seven days and seven nights. ~ Mark Jackman
Humor Reading Poem quotes by Mark Jackman
Maybe my dissertation really had been as brilliant as he claimed, the truth was I remember almost nothing about it; the intellectual leaps I made when I was young were a distant memory to me, and now I was surrounded by a kind of aura, when really my only goal in life was to do a little reading and get in bed at four in the afternoon with a carton of cigarettes and a bottle; and yet, at the same time, I had to admit, I was going to die if I kept that up – I was going to die fast, unhappy and alone. And did I really want to die fast, unhappy and alone? In the end, only kind of. ~ Michel Houellebecq
Humor Reading Poem quotes by Michel Houellebecq
It is the first experience you ever had of reading a decent poem: 'Oh, somebody else is lonely, too! ~ Mary Ruefle
Humor Reading Poem quotes by Mary Ruefle
You'd think people had better things to gossip about," said Ginny as she sat on the common room floor, leaning against Harry's legs and reading the Daily Prophet. "Three Dementor attacks in a week, and all Romilda Vane does is ask me if it's true you've got a Hippogriff tattooed across your chest."
Ron and Hermione both roared with laughter. Harry ignored them.
What did you tell her?"
I told her it's a Hungarian Horntail," said Ginny, turning a page of the newspaper idly. "Much more macho."
Thanks," said Harry, grinning. "And what did you tell her Ron's got?"
A Pygmy Puff, but I didn't say where. ~ J.K. Rowling
Humor Reading Poem quotes by J.K. Rowling
You'll be seeing him tomorrow night, anyway."

"I am?" Hyacinth asked, at precisely the moment Mr. St. Clair said, "She will?"

"You're accompanying me to the Pleinsworth poetry reading," Lady D told her grandson. "Or have you forgotten?"

Hyacinth sat back, enjoying the sight of Gareth St. Clair's mouth opening and closing in obvious distress. He looked a bit like a fish, she decided. A fish with the features of a Greek god, but still, a fish.

"I really…" he said. "That is to say, I can't - "

"You can, and you will be there," Lady D said. "You promised."

He regarded her with a stern expression. "I cannot imagine - "

"Well, if you didn't promise, you should have done, and if you love me…"

Hyacinth coughed to cover her laugh, then tried not to smirk when Mr. St. Clair shot a dirty look in her direction.

"When I die," he said, "surely my epitaph will read, 'He loved his grandmother when no one else would.'"

"And what's wrong with that?" Lady Danbury asked. ~ Julia Quinn
Humor Reading Poem quotes by Julia Quinn
You should spend more time reading the Good Book and less reading all those novels. What are you going to tell the Lord on Judgement Day when He asks you why you didn't read your bible? Hmm?
I will tell Him that His press agents could have done with a writing lesson or two, I said. To myself. ~ Jennifer Donnelly
Humor Reading Poem quotes by Jennifer Donnelly
The memories are in the words. And from that the strange thought comes that my memories are trapped in all the copies of this poem, and so everyone who's reading it, no matter what copy, has my memories without knowing it. ~ Cath Crowley
Humor Reading Poem quotes by Cath Crowley
And in the night, when the dog barks at shadows, tell him
not to be afraid of what he cannot see
or the things he does not yet understand.
There is mystery everywhere.
Beneath rocks, there is damp earth
and an army of ants
planning a revolution.

Esteban stood at the front of the room, staring at the page. Then he lifted his head and looked at us. We cheered again, even louder this time. I don't know if any of us really understood his dad's poem. But for a long time after he'd finished reading, I thought about that army of ants, how they were coming together.
Like us. ~ Jacqueline Woodson
Humor Reading Poem quotes by Jacqueline Woodson
Chapter One. The Bride." He held up the book then. "I'm reading it to you for relax." He practically shoved the book in my face. "By S. Morgenstern. Great Florinese writer. The Princess Bride. He too came to America. S. Morgenstern. Dead now in New York. The English is his own. He spoke eight tongues." Here my father put down the book and held up all his fingers. "Eight. Once in Florin City ... ~ William Goldman
Humor Reading Poem quotes by William Goldman
Watch, how the sun
slowly rises
from behind my ear

new lines, new countries
spring up in my palms

my rough hair
become swaying silk

and all the leaves
in my body
become lusher than fruits. ~ Sanober Khan
Humor Reading Poem quotes by Sanober Khan
That's the problem with this never-ending centipede of lemmings, Beck. You know they're all pussies, each and every one of 'em. They buy these books to get scared because their lives are too easy. How pathetic is that? ~ Caroline Kepnes
Humor Reading Poem quotes by Caroline Kepnes
Tyrena did not laugh again but her smile slashed upward in a twist of green lips. "Martin, Martin, Martin," she said, "the population of literate people has been declining steadily since Gutenberg's day. By the twentieth century, less than two percent of the people in the so-called industrialized democracies read even one book a year. And that was before the smart machines, dataspheres, and user-friendly environments. ~ Dan Simmons
Humor Reading Poem quotes by Dan Simmons
The success of the poem is determined not by how much the poet felt in writing it, but by how much the reader feels in reading it. ~ John Ciardi
Humor Reading Poem quotes by John Ciardi
Geeks are not the world's rowdiest people. We're quiet and introspective, and usually more comfortable communing with our keyboards or a good book than each other. Our idea of how to paint the
Emerald City red involves light liquor, heavy munchies, and marathon sessions of video games of the 'giant robots shooting each other and everything else in sight' variety. We debate competing lines of software or gaming consoles with passion, and dissect every movie, television show, and novel in the science fiction, fantasy, and horror genres.

With as many of us as there are in this town, people inevitably find ways to cater to us when we get in the mood to spend our hard-earned dollars. Downtown Seattle boasts grandiose geek magnets, like the Experience Music Project and the Experience Science Fiction museum, but it has much humbler and far more obscure attractions too, like the place we all went to for our ship party that evening: a hole-in-the-wall bar called the Electric Penguin on Capitol Hill. ~ Angela Korra'ti
Humor Reading Poem quotes by Angela Korra'ti
You can say no if you dun' wanna do it," he finally says, "but I was thinkin' maybe you could teach me to read."
"Shit, Jimmy, I just gave away my reading slate to Bill."
"I know it," he says, "but I didn't wanna read none of that stuff anyhow."
"Then what did you want to read?"
"I wanna read those poems you said you might write."
I can't help but smile so wide my cheeks hurt.
"Okay, Jimmy. I'm going to write you a poem for your birthday, and then I'm going to teach you how to read it. ~ Ryan Winfield
Humor Reading Poem quotes by Ryan Winfield
If you feel like you're drowning, don't forget that it is just a feeling; it will pass with love and care. If you're actually drowning, then how are you reading this? ~ Dani N M.
Humor Reading Poem quotes by Dani N M.
A writer flirts with schizophrenia, nurtures synesthesia, and embraces obsessive-compulsive disorder. Your art feeds on you, your soul, and, yes, to a degree, your sanity. Writing novels worth reading will bugger up your mind, jeopardize your relationships, and distend your life. You have been warned. ~ David Mitchell
Humor Reading Poem quotes by David Mitchell
You want to lash out at the parts of your self that seem to hold you back. At moments like that, it's important to be able to sit down and speak gently within yourself, as if saying a prayer or reading a poem. Whichever part of you is unhappy, reassure it: accept your many selves, and allow them to speak both to you and to each other. ~ William Sieghart
Humor Reading Poem quotes by William Sieghart
They're book addicts. ~ Lemony Snicket
Humor Reading Poem quotes by Lemony Snicket
I just know from experience that reading a funny poem aloud, especially at the beginning of a public reading, can have a certain effect. Somehow narrowing the spectrum of possible emotional reactions. So while I like it when people laugh at my poems, and I definitely enjoy being funny in them, I don't really think that's the most important thing that's going on, at least not to me. ~ Matthew Zapruder
Humor Reading Poem quotes by Matthew Zapruder
The beauty in being so restless,
Racing minds breed wandering souls ~ Natalie Nascenzi
Humor Reading Poem quotes by Natalie Nascenzi
Reading a poem in translation," wrote Bialek, "is like kissing a woman through a veil"; and reading Greek poems, with a mixture of katharevousa and the demotic, is like kissing two women. Translation is a kind of transubstantiation; one poem becomes another. You choose your philosophy of translation just as you choose how to live: the free adaptation that sacrifices detail to meaning, the strict crib that sacrifices meaning to exactitude. The poet moves from life to language, the translator moves from language to life; both like the immigrant, try to identify the invisible, what's between the lines, the mysterious implications. ~ Anne Michaels
Humor Reading Poem quotes by Anne Michaels
I find that my reading, particularly nonfiction, can inspire a poem as well as anything else. ~ Billy Collins
Humor Reading Poem quotes by Billy Collins
Cookbooks, it should be stressed, do not belong in the kitchen at all. We keep them there for the sake of appearances; occasionally, we smear their pages together with vibrant green glazes or crimson compotes, in order to delude ourselves, and any passing browsers, that we are practicing cooks; but in all honesty, a cookbook is something you read in the living room, or in the bathroom, or in bed. ~ Anthony Lane
Humor Reading Poem quotes by Anthony Lane
[T]he pain was unspeakable, worse than reading the collected works of Edith Wharton. ~ Kevin Hearne
Humor Reading Poem quotes by Kevin Hearne
Scientific understanding is often beautiful, a profoundly aesthetic experience which gives pleasure not unlike the reading of a great poem. ~ Paul Nurse
Humor Reading Poem quotes by Paul Nurse
The spirits of the brain are directly connected to the testicles. This is why men who weary their imagination in books are less suitable for procreative functions ... ~ Louis De La Forge
Humor Reading Poem quotes by Louis De La Forge
To me; reading a book is like watching a movie. Once I start, I can't stop until it's over. ~ Anonymous
Humor Reading Poem quotes by Anonymous
The whole experience reminded me of my own 'old lady' phase that I went through in high school while I was reading Somerset Maugham ... The embroidered sweaters, the costume jewelry ... I remember genuinely WANTING to be old then, to act as if the business of my life was already all but over, and that I was preternaturally wise because of it ...
God, the stupid things you'll do to try and meet boys ... ~ Chris Ware
Humor Reading Poem quotes by Chris Ware
There is a celebrated aphorism insisting that the best way to live is to 'work like you don't need the money, dance like nobody is watching, and love like you've never been hurt.' ... After years of hearing and reading these lines I have decided to tell the truth: the original version is wrong. There is a grave error in the wording of this adage. The correct version should go as follows:
Love like you don't need the money,
Work like nobody is watching,
Dance like you've never been hurt.
See? Doesn't that make more sense? ~ Gina Barreca
Humor Reading Poem quotes by Gina Barreca
If you are reading this then you have wasted another day of your life day dreaming, rather than planning the life God intended you to live. ~ Shannon L. Alder
Humor Reading Poem quotes by Shannon L. Alder
The Real-World was a sprawling mess of a book in need of a good editor. ~ Jasper Fforde
Humor Reading Poem quotes by Jasper Fforde
The dull people decided years and years ago, as everyone knows, that novel-writing was the lowest species of literary exertion, and that novel reading was a dangerous luxury and an utter waste of time. ~ Wilkie Collins
Humor Reading Poem quotes by Wilkie Collins
The other gift - a book of poems, called, "The Cowardly Morning" - Waner put on Corinne's desk at the office, with a note saying, "This man is Coleridge and Blake and Rilke all in one, and more."
She didn't pick up the book again until she was in bed, late that night.
[...]
The first poem was the title poem. This time Corinne read it through aloud. But still she didn't hear it. She read it through a third time, and heard some of it. She read it through a fourth time, and heard all of it. It was the poem containing the lines:
'Not wasteland, but a great inverted forest
with all foliage underground.'
As though it might be best to look immediately for shelter, Corinne had to put the book down. At any moment the apartment building seemed liable to lose its balance and topple across Fifth Avenue into Central Park. She waited. Gradually the deluge of truth and beauty abated.
- The Inverted Forest (1947) ~ J.D. Salinger
Humor Reading Poem quotes by J.D. Salinger
Wearing glasses for reading meant surrendering to old age without the least bit of a fight. ~ Andrea Camilleri
Humor Reading Poem quotes by Andrea Camilleri
The Librarian considered matters for a while. So ... a dwarf and a troll. He preferred both species to humans. For one thing, neither of them were great readers. The Librarian was, of course, very much in favor of reading in general, but readers in particular got on his nerves. There was something, well, sacrilegious about the way they kept taking books off the shelves and wearing out the words by reading them. He liked people who loved and respected books, and the best way to do that, in the Librarian's opinion, was to leave them on the shelves where Nature intended them to be. ~ Terry Pratchett
Humor Reading Poem quotes by Terry Pratchett
I always find that after reading books written by Jane Austen that I speak much more properly, at least for a while. ~ Becky Watson
Humor Reading Poem quotes by Becky Watson
With lines that show an unyielding dedication to craft, these poems are not afraid of meaning or the meaningful. More and more every day, the thinking American asks how she is to believe in love when there is war all about her, and in each of her deeply felt lyrics, Elyse Fenton confronts this question with the kind of tenderness one lover reserves for another. If every poem is indeed a love poem,Clamor is indeed a debut worth reading and about which we must make noise. ~ Jericho Brown
Humor Reading Poem quotes by Jericho Brown
So I'm over there in England, you know, trying to get news about the [L.A.] riots ... and all these Brit people are trying to sympathize with me ... 'Oh Bill, crime is horrible. Bill, if it's any consolation crime is horrible here, too.' ... Shutup. This is Hobbitown and I am Bilbo Hicks, Okay? This is a land of fairies and elves. You do not have crime like we have crime, but I appreciate you trying to be, you know, Diplomatic. You gotta see English crime. It's hilarious, you don't know if you're reading the front page or the comic section over there. I swear to God. I read an article - front page of the paper - one day, in England: 'Yesterday, some Hooligans knocked over a dustbin in Shafsbry.' Wooooo ... 'The hooligans are loose! The hooligans are loose! What if they become roughians? I would hate to be a dustbin in Shafsbry tonight. ~ Bill Hicks
Humor Reading Poem quotes by Bill Hicks
Rob turned the rustling pages and grinned.
'Ach, she's writ here: "Oh, the dear Feegles ha' turned up again,"' he said. This met with general applause.
'Ach, what a kind girl she is tae write that,' said Billy Bigchin. 'Can I see?'
He read: "Oh dear, the Feegles have turned up again."
'Ah,' he said. ~ Terry Pratchett
Humor Reading Poem quotes by Terry Pratchett
As a writer, I roll around in words the way cats roll around in catnip. ~ Gina Barreca
Humor Reading Poem quotes by Gina Barreca
Saturday was the fifth day of Flush's imprisonment. Almost exhausted, almost hopeless, he lay panting in his dark corner of the teeming floor. Doors slammed and banged. Rough voices cried. Women screamed. Parrots chattered as they had never chattered to widows in Maida Vale, but now evil old women merely cursed at them. Insects crawled in his fur, but he was too weak, too indifferent to shake his coat. All Flush's past life and its many scenes – Reading, the greenhouse, Miss Mitford, Mr Kenyon, the bookcases, the busts, the peasants on the blind – had faded like snowflakes dissolved in a cauldron. If he still held to hope, it was to something nameless and formless; the featureless face of someone he still called 'Miss Barrett'. She still existed; all the rest of the world was gone, but she still existed, though such gulfs lay between them that it was impossible, almost, that she should reach him still. Darkness began to fall again, such darkness as seemed almost able to crush out his last hope – Miss Barrett. ~ Virginia Woolf
Humor Reading Poem quotes by Virginia Woolf
A friend came over to the house
a few days ago and read one of my poems.
He came back today and asked to read the
same poem over again. After he finished
reading it, he said, It makes me want to write poetry. ~ Richard Brautigan
Humor Reading Poem quotes by Richard Brautigan
When they returned to Filigree Street, Mori refused even to go upstairs. Instead he hid under a quilt in the parlour with Thaniel's never-read copy of Anna Karenina. The Russians, he said, knew how to write genuinely boring novels, and he would only stop being afraid when he was bored enough. They were all the more boring because he could remember reading the end in the recent future. ~ Natasha Pulley
Humor Reading Poem quotes by Natasha Pulley
I was writing a poem, and suddenly, I fell asleep on a page.
I was dreaming of you. You were talking to me. I discovered that
you were all words and phrases.

Passion generated poetry, in which you were all the verses.
I was reading my book and found that you are all the pages.
كنت أكتب قصيدة , وفجأة, غفوت عليها.

كنت أحلم بك.
كنت تتحدث إلي بين
حروفي التي خطتها شفتيك
وأفقت على ضمتك لشوق كلماتي
وترجم صدرك تعابير الشغف
إلى عبارات
.
عشقي أنجب شعراً,
وأنت فيه كل الأبيات.

كنت أقرأ كتابي,
فوجدتك كل الصفحات ~ Amany Al-Hallaq
Humor Reading Poem quotes by Amany Al-Hallaq
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