Greeting Card Quotes

It's a funny thing about the modern world. You hear girls in the toilets of clubs saying, "Yeah, he fucked off and left me. He didn't love me. He just couldn't deal with love. He was too fucked up to know how to love me." Now, how did that happen? What was it about this unlovable century that convinced us we were, despite everything, eminently lovable as a people, as a species? What made us think that anyone who fails to love us is damaged, lacking, malfunctioning in some way? And particularly if they replace us with a god, or a weeping madonna, or the face of Christ in a ciabatta roll
then we call them crazy. Deluded. Regressive. We are so convinced of the goodness of ourselves, and the goodness of our love, we cannot bear to believe that there might be something more worthy of love than us, more worthy of worship. Greeting cards routinely tell us everybody deserves love. No. Everybody deserves clean water. Not everybody deserves love all the time. ~ Zadie Smith

I think.. I just want to look different.'
...
'Is that ridiculous?'

Priyanka came toward me, her expression contemplative.

'No, it's not. The only way to live is by following whatever message your heart is beating out for you.'

'Did you read that on a greeting card?' I asked.

'No, on some kind of medication ad,' she admitted, 'but it doesn't make it any less true.'

I turned back to the mirror and picked up the scissors again. ~ Alexandra Bracken

Don't send funny greeting cards on birthdays or at Christmas. Save them for funerals, when their cheery effect is needed. ~ P. J. O'Rourke

I've made it my business to observe fathers and daughters. And I've seen some incredible, beautiful things. Like the little girl who's not very cute - her teeth are funny, and her hair doesn't grow right, and she's got on thick glasses - but her father holds her hand and walks with her like she's a tiny angel that no one can touch. He gives her the best gift a woman can get in this world: protection. And the little girl learns to trust the man in her life. And all the things that the world expects from women - to be beautiful, to soothe the troubled spirit, heal the sick, care for the dying, send the greeting card, bake the cake - allof those things become the way we pay the father back for protecting us ... ~ Adriana Trigiani

Valentine's Day was created by the greeting card industry to get pussy. ~ Anthony Jeselnik

You see one painting, I see another, the art book puts it at another remove still, the lady buying the greeting card at the museum gift shop sees something else entire, and that's not even to mention the people separated from us by time - four hundred years before us, four hundred years after we're gone - it'll never strike anybody the same way and the great majority of people it'll never strike in any deep way at all but - a really great painting is fluid enough to work its way into the mind and heart through all kinds of different angles, in ways that are unique and very particular. Yours, yours. I was painted for you. ~ Donna Tartt

Between Twitter and Facebook and how close you can be with your fans and how close they can be to you these days is, I think, quite miraculous. It's like getting a greeting card every single day. ~ Holland Roden

You're too much of a bitch to go gently into that good night."
"You should put that on a greeting card. ~ SE Zbasnik

For Dad, the perfect Father's Day would be one in which he didn't even realize that it was Father's Day, because nobody was making him appreciate gifts he didn't want, or read greeting cards filled with lame Father's Day poetry. ~ Dave Barry

No wonder Thanksgiving was my favorite - you can't buy it, wrap it, or put it under a tree, and even the greeting card companies can't seem to make a buck off of it. It's just a meal, with people who you love and who love you back, no matter what. ~ C.I. Dennis

I think love is nothing but a fallacy propagated by the greeting card industry and a billion-dollar bridal enterprise that feeds into the fantasy of every little girl. ~ Addison Moore

Perhaps I had never had a grip on myself to start with, living life on cruise-control while I waited for a home that would never be mine. It would be warm. Loving. Wonderfully chaotic, occasionally tempestuous, but full of good intentions and laughter. It would be all of the great things embodied by your run-of-the-mill greeting card, and it was still the last thing that I thought of each night as I let myself believe for a moment or two that such things were possible. ~ Alice Yi-Li Yeh

My skin may have wrinkles but it's because I'm smiling so much. That might sound like some terrible American greetings card, but I feel it's immoral for me to castigate my body for getting older, when it does everything I ask of it. ~ Olivia Williams

The first time I heard him speak, I was sunk; his voice made my stomach do a skydive to my toes without a parachute. His voice reminded me of jazz and the bedroom and a strip tease: melodic, deep, soothing, slightly sandpapery, but with an irreverent, careless quality. I daydreamed about him reading me a book, the newspaper, a greeting card, an eviction notice - anything. ~ Penny Reid

Back in the 1980s when everyone looked a bit off, my friend Tim and his brothers had some publicity shots taken of their band. Eventually they sold the rights to a stock photo agency. Years later, one of the images turned up on a greeting card. The inside said, Greetings from the Dork Club. ~ Mary Roach

What was the value, really, of an alibi between lovers, friends, or family members? Idea for greeting card: 'Will You Be My Alibi? ~ Jincy Willett

Each time you toss out a 'singing' greeting card, you are disposing of more computing power than existed in the entire world before 1950. ~ Paul Saffo

I have all of the Apple products. Everything I've ever written, I've written on a Mac. My first computer, my roommates and I chipped in, and we got that first Macintosh - 128K. It had as much memory as a greeting card that plays music. ~ Aaron Sorkin

The love of Christ is not a pretend love. It is not a greeting-card love. It is not the kind of love that is praised in popular music and movies. ~ Dieter F. Uchtdorf

Conversion was turning out to be quite far from the greeting-card moment promised by televangelists, when Jesus steps into your life, personally saves you, and becomes your lucky charm forever. Instead, it was socially and politically awkward, as well as profoundly confusing. I wasn't struck with any sudden conviction that I now understood the "truth." If anything, I was just crabbier, lonelier, and more destabilized. ~ Sara Miles

Some days I do appreciate things more, eggs, flowers, but then I decide I'm only having an attack of sentimentality, my brain going pastel Technicolor, like a beautiful-sunset greeting cards they used to make so many of in California. High-gloss hearts.
The danger is grayout. ~ Margaret Atwood

There are all kinds of ways and reasons that mothers can and should be praised. But for cultivating a sense of invisibility, martyrdom and tirelessly working unnoticed and unsung? Those are not reasons. Praising women for standing in the shadows? Wrong. Where is the greeting card that praises the kinds of mothers I know? Or better yet, the kind of mother I was raised by? I need a card that says: "Happy Mother's Day to the mom who taught me to be strong, to be powerful, to be independent, to be competitive, to be fiercely myself and fight for what I want." Or "Happy Birthday to a mother who taught me to argue when necessary, to raise my voice for my beliefs, to not back down when I know I am right." Or "Mom, thanks for teaching me to kick ass and take names at work. Get well soon." Or simply "Thank you, Mom, for teaching me how to make money and feel good about doing it. Merry Christmas. ~ Shonda Rhimes

I take my time walking up the stairs and onto the street. I want life to move slowly because I want to anticipate you with all my heart, greet you with all my heart, fuck you with all my heart and miss you with all my heart. I have to laugh because I sound like a greeting card but I deserve this, you, joy. ~ Caroline Kepnes

We can talk about courage and love and compassion until we sound like a greeting card store, but unless we're willing to have an honest conversation about what gets in the way of putting these into practice in our daily lives, we will never change. Never, ever. ~ Brene Brown

I include myself in the posters because I feel like it forms a more intimate relationship between the artist and the person passing by. And it's important to include some vulnerability and use fears and rejections and various aspects from my own life so people look at my work as more than greeting card fodder. ~ Morley

There is an assumption, put forth by everyone from greeting card companies to Bruce Springsteen, that nobody likes to be alone, least of all women. But many women, long valued in context to their relations to other people, find solitude- both the act of being alone and the attitude of being independent- a surprisingly sweet relief. ~ Rebecca Traister

Frey winced. "Hello, Sumarbrander. I didn't mean to ignore you."
"Yeah, yeah. Well, Magnus here is going to get Bragi to write an epic poem about me!"
"Frey raised an eyebrow. "You are?"
"Uh -"
"That's right!" Jack huffed. "Frey never got Bragi to write an epic poem about me! The only thing he ever gave me was a stupid Hallmark Sword's Day card."
Added to my mental notes: there was such a thing as Sword's Day. I silently cursed the greeting-card industry. ~ Rick Riordan

I wrote home to say how lovely everything was, and I used flourishing words and phrases, as if I were living life in a greeting card - the kind that has a satin ribbon on it, and quilted hearts and roses, and is expected to be so precious to the person receiving it that the manufacturer has placed a leaf of plastic on the front to protect it. ~ Jamaica Kincaid

The llama was wearing a bridle with a rope attached where you might expect to find reins. A greeting card was hanging from his neck:
'Hola Como se llama? Yo me llamo C. Llama.'
During his preschool years, Clay's favorite cartoon had featured a Spanish-speaking boy naturalist who was always saving animals with his girl cousin, and Clay still knew enough of the language to translate:
'Hello. How do you call yourself? I call myself Como C. Llama.'
The llama's name is What is your name? ~ Pseudonymous Bosch

If you live in your sense, slowly, with attention, if you use your eyes and your fingertips and your taste buds, then romance is something you'll never need a greeting card to make you remember. ~ Erica Bauermeister

Love is on every side, Cupid said. And no one's side. Don't ask what Love can do for you.
"Great," Jason said. "Now he's spouting greeting card messages. ~ Rick Riordan

I found religion in the greeting card aisle now i know hallmark was right ~ Ani DiFranco

Even worse is the discovery that one has been living out certain greeting-card sentiments, with ribbons of middle-class virtue tied in a bow around one's heart. ~ Saul Bellow

Many kids come out of college, they have a credit card and a diploma. They don't know how to buy a house or a car or health insurance or life insurance. They do not know basic microeconomics. ~ Jesse Jackson

Individually, human beings are all dolts.> ~ Orson Scott Card

Never mind that the story had turned out to be lies and foolishness - there was always folks stupid enough to say, Where there's smoke there's fire, when the saying should have been, Where there's scandalous lies there's always malicious believers and spreaders-around, regardless of evidence. ~ Orson Scott Card

You just live in the place you're in, you don't worry about where you used to be or where you wish you were, here is where you are and here's where you've got to find a way to survive ~ Orson Scott Card

And the more I thought of what had happened, the wilder and darker it grew. I reviewed the whole extraordinary sequence of events as I rattled on through the silent gas-lit streets. There was the original problem: that at least was pretty clear now. The death of Captain Morstan, the sending of the pearls, the advertisement, the letter, - we had had light upon all those events. They had only led us, however, to a deeper and far more tragic mystery. The Indian treasure, the curious plan found among Morstan's baggage, the strange scene at Major Sholto's death, the rediscovery of the treasure immediately followed by the murder of the discoverer, the very singular accompaniments to the crime, the footsteps, the remarkable weapons, the words upon the card, corresponding with those upon Captain Morstan's chart, - here was indeed a labyrinth in which a man less singularly endowed than my fellow-lodger might well despair of ever finding the clue. ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

Keep this in mind - it only works because what's between you, that's real, that's what matters. Billions of those connections between human beings. That's what you're fighting to keep alive. ~ Orson Scott Card

And frankly, I don't understand - I mean, I'm obviously a card-carrying Democrat - but I can't understand why any woman would want to vote for Mitt Romney, except maybe Mrs. Romney. ~ Madeleine Albright

He did what he thought was right, ~ Orson Scott Card

Every time I see his name (Dean Chance) on a lineup card, I feel like throwing up. ~ Mickey Mantle

Chase picked up the card. "I'm happy to share from my personal experience, if you like."
Temple grinned at his hand. "And I."
It was all too much. "I do not need advice. She enjoyed it immensely."
"I hear they don't all enjoy it right off the bat," Cross said.
"That is true," Chase said, all expertise.
"It's fine if she didn't, old man," Temple offered. "You can try again."
"She enjoyed it." Bourne's voice was low and tight, and he thought he might kill the next person who spoke.
"Well, one thing is for certain," Temple said, casually, and Bourne ignored the pang of disappointment that the enormous man was very likely the
only one at the table he could not kill. ~ Sarah MacLean

I got my first job as a card-carrying actor in New York in 1967. Before that, I was a very desperate wannabe. ~ Morgan Freeman

You who speak languages, you are such liars. ~ Orson Scott Card

As far as I can see, in this world, you're a fool for not using whatever gifts
you're given. It's not as though you lied or cheated or stole to get Howard Marlowe as your father. That's
who he is; that's who you are. You got dealt a bad card when you were bitten - so use one of the better
cards you have in your hand to make up for it. ~ Claudia Gray

Lord, please restore to us the comfort of merit and demerit. Show us that there is at least something we can do. Tell us that at the end of the day there will at least be one redeeming card of our very own. Lord, if it is not too much to ask, send us to bed with a few shreds of self-respect upon which we can congratulate ourselves. But whatever you do, do not preach grace. Give us something to do, anything; but spare us the indignity of this indiscriminate acceptance. ~ Robert Farrar Capon

Lucas seemed to have realized our prediciment at the same moment I had. "I haven't got my credit card with me. Kinda left in a hurry. We just spent the only cash I had in my pocket." Too-bright signs from the few open stores made mee squint. "We'd have been better off with a slingshot and Oreos. ~ Claudia Gray

It was funny. The adults taking all this so seriously, and the children playing
along, playing along, believing it too until suddenly the adults went too far, tried too hard, and the children
could see through their game. ~ Orson Scott Card

We're an ecological disaster."
"Exactly," said the expendable. ~ Orson Scott Card

Charming. Really. But you can give up all your attempts to get into my undies now because it's not going to happen. I see you for what you are, a card carrying member of those determined to prove that it's possible for men of the supernatural species to get STD's. I'm just not sure who's President of the club, yet, you or Kent. Not to mention that I've discovered I'm basically allergic to you, and frankly, I don't feel like taking an allergy pill just so I can see this big dick you claim to carry. It's nice to meet you, though. Really." ~ Jenna ~ Jessie Lane

When Chveya was seven years old she had understood perfectly how the world worked. Now she was eight, and there were some questions. ~ Orson Scott Card

I've always been given respect because I'm kind of mannish, and I'm not a great beauty. I've never played the coquette card because I'm no good at it. ~ Martha Wainwright

How short life is for fools. ~ Orson Scott Card

What is the disease which manifests itself in an inability to leave a party
any party at all
until it is all over and the lightsare being put out? ... I suppose that part of this mania for staying is due to a fear that, if I go, something good will happen and I'll miss it. Somebody might do card tricks, or shoot somebody else. ~ Robert Benchley

My mind when the sounding bowls are in play. I also draw Angel Cards17 several times a day to help me stay focused on what I believe is important in life. The original Angel Cards come in sets of assorted sizes with each card having a single word written on them. Every morning when I first get up, I ritualistically invite an angel into my life and draw a card. I then focus my attention on that particular angel throughout my day. If I am feeling stressed or have an important phone call to make, I will often draw another angel to help me shift my mind. I am ~ Jill Bolte Taylor

I wish you all the joy that you can wish. ~ William Shakespeare

Abby must have been the one who found the safe house, because Townsend didn't like it.
"The building across the street is under construction," he snarled as soon as we'd carried our bags inside.
"The elevator has key card access, and I've hacked into the surveillance cameras from every system on the block," Abby argued. "We have a three-hundred-sixty-degree visual."
"Excellent." Townsend dropped his bag. "Now the circle can see us from every angle."
"Don't mind Agent Townsend, girls," Abby told us. "He's a glass-half-empty kind of spy."
"Also known as the good kind," he countered.
Abby huffed. ~ Ally Carter

Hey, we've got this guy, Dan! He's ours!" Dan Tomsic stared at her with the disdain he reserved for shitbirds, defense attorneys, and card-carrying members of the ACLU. He said, "It's easier to cut off your own goddamned leg than convict a rich man in this state, detective. Haven't you been around long enough to know that? ~ Robert Crais

Nobody had a credit card when I was a kid. No one had credit card debt. But these big companies and banks wanted to know how to get more money out of people - get them charging things. ~ Michael Moore

I'm Kan, the Louis Vouitton don / Bought my mom purse, now she Louis Vuitton mom / I didn't play the hand I was dealt I changed my cards / I prayed to the skies and I changed my stars / I went to the malls and I balled too hard / Oh My God is that a Black card / I turned around and replied why yes, but I prefer the term African American Express ~ Kanye West

I'd been so tired of 'strong female characters' for so long by then. I was so tired of the way female strength was made to look cold and humorless; the way it was characterized as deviant and 'unnatural' and always lonely and exceptional. I was tired of the grim undertone of tragedy that lurked under its surface. 'Strong female characters' were never funny, and they never had any fun, either. More often than not, they were celibate, friendless, and clinically depressed. Their monomaniacal devotion to crime fighting made them lean, cranky, and impatient. Naturally, they had axes to grind: they were avenging brides, poker-faced assassins, gloomy ninjas with commitment issues. Who were these characters? What were they trying to tell us? Why didn't they ever say goodbye before hanging up the phone? And why were they always being reborn or remade as killing machines after losing everything they held dear?

...I don't want to see another symbolic woman start all over again. I want to see the symbolic world change to acknowledge her existence. I don't want to see a young girl get a makeover or go shopping with her boyfriend's credit card. I want to watch her blow up the Death Star - metaphorically, of course. ~ Carina Chocano

Our [western] culture embraces sex addiction. If I drink too much or rack up credit-card debt or lose the rent in Vegas, that's bad. But if I have many lovers, that's good. ~ Susan Cheever

When you walk into a store and you want to buy something, you give them cash and they sell it to you. But very often, you walk into our "store" and you want something - a credit card, maybe, or a loan - and very often the answer is "No," even if you're a large corporation. ~ Jamie Dimon

Forced to define 'irrational subconscious,' I would say that it is a small padded room inside all of us, where the only furnishing is a small card table, and the only thing on the card table is a revolver loaded with flexible bullets. ~ Stephen King

Consumers who are thinking of opening one of these no-limit credit cards may want to think how deeply their scores will be affected. ~ Craig Watts

The only people who ever prize purity of ignorance are those who profit from a monopoly on knowledge. ~ Orson Scott Card

Are "people in the world", I wonder, creatures that spend their whole lives greeting each other in stiff, formal patterns, being cautious about each other, then growing tired of each other? I hate meeting people. ~ Osamu Dazai

John J. Hendee of Blackman, Michigan, argued that he was entitled to a job simply because he was "governed by the principles" outlined on an enclosed card. Labeled, "God's Commands," the manifesto called on its bearers to worship God, tell the truth, abstain from "intoxicating drinks," and avoid marrying "blood relation[s]." The list of commandments ended with the warning: "Waste not your strength in any unnatural manner" - in other words, do not masturbate. ~ Harold Holzer

Certain folks start playing Sindh Card despite having ravaged the life of the common Sindhi. ~ Imran Khan

PLACE YOUR HAND ON THE SCANNER AT THE HEAD OF YOUR BUNK AND SPEAK YOUR NAME TWICE. ~ Orson Scott Card

A credit card is a convenient device that saves you the trouble of counting your change. ~ Evan Esar

You can always make a film somehow. You can beg, borrow, steal the equipment, use credit cards, use your friends' goodwill, wheedle your way into this or that situation. The real problem is, how do you get people to see it once it is made? ~ Walter Murch

This is of course why violence is so often the preferred weapon of the stupid. One might even call it the trump card of the stupid, since (and this is surely one of the tragedies of human existence) it is the one form of stupidity to which it is most difficult to come up with an intelligent response. ~ David Graeber

Please select a card. No I don't have to see the card ... I've already seen this trick ... ~ Michael Ammar

Whether brainstormed or borrowed, record each exciting idea onto an index card. You're welcome to fill the index card up completely, or you can simply write the main hook for each idea, before moving onto the next. ~ Emlyn Chand

Classification may very well not be useless, but it is never analysis, no matter how baroquely detailed and comprehensive-seeming its categories. At best, it begs questions. At worst it is presumptuous and totalitarian, replacing understanding with filing. We have all heard papers where categories are the driving force, according to which the way we understand literature (or whatever) is to work out what title fits where, as if literary theory was a giant card-catalog. Even when the last book has been slotted neatly into the last of the holes that were cut to be filled with books, what we have are books in neat piles. Which is not nothing, but neither is it that much. ~ China Mieville