Greased Pig Quotes

I conquered a fear of heights and water by bungee jumping from a crane over a lake. And if thats not crazy enough, I also wrestled a greased pig in a mud pit. ~ Shandi Finnessey

When I woke up in the morning I was in bad shape. My neck was stiff and I couldn't turn it. We weren't pros, so there was no such thing as a physical therapist or masseuse to fix it. The best I could do was just rub in some Bengay and hope for the best. When we got to the Czech Republic a couple of days later, my neck still had zero mobility. In order to look to the side, I had to move my entire body. As if that weren't enough to worry about, we were competing against Rachael, who was now teamed up with the Russian guy who had beaten me as a junior. His name was Evgeni Smagin, and he wore his dark hair greased back. The guy just looked slick from head to toe.
I turned to Aneta. "This is so not good," I told her. "They are like the ultimate, ultimate couple. They're going to beat us."
Aneta looked very upset, so I guess something inside me said, "Derek, man up!" My neck was messed up and I was about to get my ass kicked by my archnemesis and my ex. It couldn't get much worse than that. ~ Derek Hough

Dad got me a ... guinea pig?"
"For breakfast," Zack said. "That's why I named her Toast. You aren't going to eat her, are you?"
"No!"
"Woot!" Zack hugged the cage to his chest, carrying it off in the direction of his bedroom. "I hope you don't want to eat Marmalade or Sugar Puff either!"
"Marma
oh, never mid. ~ Helen Keeble

The pig says oink. ~ Rick Riordan

The pig winks and rolls in the bog. He kicks his legs up and his trotters clack together. The sun is low over the neighbourhood. There is the smell of oncoming night, of pollen settling, the sounds of kids fighting bath time. Lester comes down, waving his hands.
Don't drown the pig, Fish. We're saving him for Christmas! We're gonna eat him.
No!
I'll drink to that, says the pig.
Lester stands there. He looks at Fish. He looks at the porker. He peeps over the fence. The pig. The flamin' pig. The pig has just spoken. It's no language that he can understand, but there's no doubt. He feels a little crook, like maybe he should go over to that tree and puke.
I like him, Lestah.
He talks?
Yep.
Oh, my gawd.
Lester looks at his retarded son again and once more at the pig.
The pig talks.
I likes him.
Yeah, I bet.
The pig snuffles, lets off a few syllables: aka sembon itwa. It's tongues, that's what it is. A blasted Pentecostal pig.
And you understand him?
Yep. I likes him.
Always the miracles you don't need. It's not a simple world, Fish. It's not. ~ Tim Winton

The Chinese use every spare bit of an animal: cow lungs, pig ears, chicken feet, duck blood. ~ Jennifer Lee

You're a pig," I whispered back. "You know that, right?"
"So far bein' a pig works for me, babe," he said. "Gotta go now. Check out the college. Hit the clinic and get some pills. Don't call your brother. Cook something fuckin' great for dinner and don't wear any panties. That's all I ask. ~ Joanna Wylde

I'm a demon, not a pig, so I keep the place relatively neat. ~ Lisa Desrochers

A pig resembles a saint in that he is more honored after death than during his lifetime. ~ Irma S. Rombauer

If she wants I can find a hundred men and line them up before her naked, and she can pick the one she likes," the king said. "I would sooner she wed a lord, but if she prefers a hedge knight or a merchant or Pate the Pig Boy, I am past the point of caring, so long as she picks someone. ~ George R.R. Martin

a pig produces about four times as much solid waste as an average person, a typical CAFO [Concentrated Animal Feed Operation] of 5000 pigs is equivalent to a small city of 20 000 people with no sewage treatment plant (51) ~ Polly Walker

I remember an hypothesis argued upon by the young students, when I was at St. Omer's, and maintained with much learning and pleasantry on both sides, 'Whether supposing that the flavour of a big who obtained his death by whipping (per flagellationem extremem) superadded a pleasure upon the palate of a man more intense than any possible suffering we can conceive in the animal, is man justified in using that method of putting an animal to death?' I forget the decision. ~ Charles Lamb

Ok, this farmer is driving down the road in his truck and he comes to a state cop in the middle of the road with the blue flashing and everything, and the farmer asks, What's the problem, Officer?
The cop looks worried and nods on ahead where this pig is sitting right in the middle of the road-big damn pig- and the cop says, Got a problem with this pig in the road. So the farmer says, Hmmm. And the cop says, Hey I got an idea, Why don't we load this pig into your truck and then you take him to the zoo? And the farmer says, Well, I reckon we could do that. So they load they pig into the farmer's truck and off the farmer drives and that's that.
So the next day the cop is out there on the road again because that is his usual speed trap, and who do you think drives by? The farmer--and sitting right next to him in the cab is the pig. And the pig's wearing a baseball hat! The farmer and the pig just go cruising by.
So the cop shakes off the unreality of the whole situation, fires up the blue flashing light and sirens and gets scratch in 3 gears tearing out after the farmer, and caught up pretty soon and pulls the farmer over and walks up to the truck. The farmer looks real casual and says, Yessir.
The cop says, Hey, I thought I told you to take that pig to the zoo! And the farmer says, I did! We had a good time, too, so today I thought we'd go to the ball game.
HA! HA! HA! ~ Robert Wintner

According to old frineds who grew up with Stanley Ann Dunham, she became a serious student of Communist and Marxist theories back in high school. One profile even named a few of her radical teachers and administrators at Mercer High, which Dunham attended, whose classrooms formed part of what was called "anarchy alley." What sounds strange is that this avante-garde, supposedly idealistic communist-thinking student of the left met a major oil company executive during the radical 1960s, and not only found him not to be a repulsively evil money-grubbing capitalist pig, but was so taken in by his Big Oil company/military charm that she married him.
Okay, so maybe that's not coincidence. Maybe that's just the power of love. ~ Mondo Frazier

We mark the days by chores that need to be done, the way farm families have always done. Al feeds the hens and horses and pigs, splits wood in the fall, slaughters a pig when the weather turns cold, cuts ice in the winter. I collect eggs from the laying hens and Al drives me into town to sell them. He times the planting so that by the Fourth of July we'll have new peas and by September there's a whole field of corn. Gulls lunge for a feast, ravaging the crop, so Al kills a few and hangs them from poles as warning. During haying season in midsummer, I see him from the dining room window in his visored cap, scything the hay by hand with six hired men walking abreast, forking the newly mown hay onto the hayrack. They haul the hay to the barn, where a block-and-tackle hoist lifts it into the mow. ~ Christina Baker Kline

The rich fool is like a pig that is choked by its own fat. ~ Confucius

(The pig) hath a fair sepulchre in the grateful stomach of the judicious epicure - and for such a tomb might be content to die. ~ Charles Lamb

but applying logic to love is like buttering a pig before you slaughter it. ~ Penny Reid

You're a pig."
Travis shrugged. "I've been called worse. ~ Jamie McGuire

And they brought an Owl, and a useful Cart, And a pound of Rice, and a CranberryTart, And a hive of silvery Bees. And they brought a Pig, and some green Jack-daws, And a lovely Monkey with lollipop paws, and forty Bottles of Ring-Bo-Ree, And no end of Stilton Cheese. ~ Edward Lear

The word criminal is more an emotional than legal term. Go to any U.S. post office and view the faces on the wanted posters. Like Dick Tracy caricatures, they stare out of the black-and-white photographs often taken in late-night booking rooms - unshaved, pig snouted, rodent eyed, hare lipped, reassuring us that human evil is always recognizable and that consequently we will never be its victim. But ~ James Lee Burke

Started out, Funny, sexy, zaftig Margaret Cho ... What is zaftig? Isn't that German for big fat pig? I guess I was lucky- zaftig is kind of a nice word. It could have been, Funny, sexy, OBESE Margaret Cho. ~ Margaret Cho

This is the story of V and me.
Look. Each person has the possibilities of being simultaneously several beings, having several lives. The good family man doesn't have a sense of responsibility. Simultaneously, he's my angel. Simultaneously, his family's a pack of incontinent dogs. In front of men such as him who believe they're respectable, I love to talk about who they really are, the people they don't want to know and socially and politically chastise. Look. I have loved and worshiped a pig.
This society hates and locks up its madness because they hate and lock up themselves. I know the system of schizophrenia. Nevertheless I loved a pig and couldn't stop. ~ Kathy Acker

Woman in heels stands a statistical likelihood of ending her evening with her shoes in her handbag, barefoot and demanding a piggyback to the taxi stand in order to "keep her tights clean." Men are invariably the pig whose back is called for. ~ Caitlin Moran

If you rush to take a drug, do so with the full knowledge that you are being a Guinea Pig. The longer a drug is on the market, the more will be known about the side effects. ~ Robert S. Mendelsohn

Hadrian dismounted and began unloading Dancer. "How long were we on the road?" He paused to look up at the moon.
"What? Five, six hours? Not a damn word. Getting chilly out, don't you think, Hadrian? The moon looks like a fingernail, ain't that right, Hadrian? The tree looks like a goddamn bear, don't it, Hadrian? Nothing. By the way, in case you haven't noticed, I was attacked by a goshawk and a pig-riding dwarf that shot eggs at me with a sling. I was knocked from my horse and wrestled with the dwarf, the hawk, and the pig for what had to be half an hour. The dwarf kept smashing eggs in my face, and the ruddy pig pinned me down, licking them off. I only got away because the dwarf ran out of eggs. Then the hawk turned into a moth that became distracted by the light of the moon."
Royce shifted to his side, hood up.
"Yeah, well ... thank Maribor and Novron I didn't need your help THAT time. ~ Michael J. Sullivan

No, he wasn't a pig. He was a lonely, hurt man who didn't know how to cope in a world that had turned its back on him. [Astrid] ~ Sherrilyn Kenyon

I meow now?" hissed J.Lo when she was gone. "What comes next? Do I juggle fire?"
"Look, I'm sorry, but it's good this happened. Mrs. Hoegaarden will probably tell people you meow, and we'll spread the word, too, and soon if anybody hears Pig they'll just think it's you."
"Yes!" droned J.Lo, throwing his hand up. "A foolproof plan! Thank Mother Ocean that you do not use your genius for evil. ~ Adam Rex

With every fragment of rock that fall from me, I can hear the voice of Marianne Engle. I love you. Aishiteru. Ego amo te. Ti amo. Eg elska pig. Ich liebe dich. It is moving across time, coming to me in every language of the world, and it sounds like pure love. ~ Andrew Davidson

The fear of forgetting anything precious can trigger in us the wish to raise a structure, like a paperweight to hold down our memories. We might even follow the example of the Countess of Mount Edgcumbe, who in the late eighteenth century had a thirty-foot-high Neoclassical obelisk erected on a hill on the outskirts of Plymouth, in memory of an unusually sensitive pig called Cupid, whom she did not hesitate to call a true friend. ~ Alain De Botton

Emo means different things to different people. Actually, that's a massive understatement. Emo seems solely to mean different things to different people - Like pig latin or books by Thomas Pynchon, confusion is one of its hallmark traits. ~ Andy Greenwald

To the heavens on the wings of a pig. ~ John Steinbeck

Do you remember, during the war, when Porky worked in a defense plant? He and Bugs Bunny. That was a good one too. ~ Thomas Pynchon

Let your little inspires someone greatly and greatly be the reasons for the smiles of someone in little things. Dare to help someone. Dare to be the reasons for somebody's little smile! Remember, it doesn't necessarily take too much to make much impact! Remember, it is our little food remains that make the ants get food in season and out of season! Remember, somewhere, it is much of the waste and less of the precious meals meant for our tables that makes the pig grows fatter! Dare to make a noble impact with your noble substance, no matter how big or small it is! Dare to cause a change that will forever be remembered, be it small or big! Dare to be the real reason for the relief of somebody. Their hearts await your impact! Their joy awaits your ignition! Take a step! Make real impact! ~ Ernest Agyemang Yeboah

Every morning, therefore, uncle Charles repaired to his outhouse but not before he had greased and brushed scrupulously his back hair and brushed and put on his tall hat. ~ James Joyce

To fatten a pig, a farmer will feed him well. The pig must think his life a paradise, never knowing he gorges himself so that he will be fatter for the knife later on. ~ David Anthony Durham

I am a rapist and a sadistic pig,' if you get that tattoo removed I will carve it into your forehead, do you understand? ~ Stieg Larsson

I want to let myself go, to glide over the charming greased surface, to be bewitched and intoxicated. And I'm no longer afraid of waking up. Let this world take me, Let this Paris squeeze me to death, so long as it first caresses me and carries me in its arms. ~ Juhani Aho

Grandchildren can be annoying - how many times can you go: "And the cow goes moo and the pig goes oink"? It's like talking to a supermodel. ~ Joan Rivers

He sighed, wondering how his life had been turned upside down by this woman in less than forty-eight hours. Correction: by this woman, a pig, and a rabbit. ~ Julia Quinn

They're always saying I'm a capitalistic pig. I suppose I am. But ... it's good for my drumming. ~ Keith Moon

I don't make you sick," he says, tightly controlled fury dripping from every word. "I make you come. I make you beg for it."
"Yes, you had to make me beg for it." I pour all my pent-up loathing and contempt into my hateful glower. "I didn't do it on my own. I never would have. Just kill me and get it over with, you scum-licking pig, because I am Tamara Bennett, and I will end your disgusting life or die trying. I am not Toy, I was never Toy, and I never will be. You fucking failed at breaking me, like you fail at life, you piece of shit."
Instead of answering, he turns and storms out of the room.
As soon as he's out the door, I hear him shouting. No, roaring. An animal sound of pure fury. I hear glass breaking and a door slam repeatedly.
I've made the iceman lose control.
I smile to myself.
I shut my eyes and remember that I'm Tamara again. It feels so good to be Tamara ~ Ginger Talbot

If I say you're a goatherd's son, you say, 'Yes, Lord Ralon.'"
Alanna gasped with fury. "I'd as soon kiss a pig! Is that what you've been doing-kissing pigs? Or being kissed? ~ Tamora Pierce