Golfers Quotes

Our championship committee pledged to review entry conditions and to assess how women golfers might compete on equal terms with men for a place in the Open. ~ Peter Dawson

There's more tension in golf than in boxing because golfers bring it on themselves. It's silly really because it's not as if the golf ball is going to jump up and belt you on the whiskers, is it? ~ Henry Cooper

Players who stand flat footed and swing with their arms are golfers, not hitters. ~ Rogers Hornsby

Some golfers, we are told, enjoy the landscape; but properly, the landscape shrivels and compresses into the grim, surrealistically vivid patch of grass directly under the golfer's eyes as he morosely walks toward where he thinks his ball might be. ~ John Updike

Golfers have a tendency to be very masochistic. They like to punish themselves for some reason. A lot of them like tough courses. ~ Jack Nicklaus

If golfers can run around and crow when they make a birdie, I think it would be just as proper to lie down on the green and cry when you make a bogey. ~ J. C. Snead

I do not trust doctors. They are like golfers. Every one has a different answer to your problems. ~ Seve Ballesteros

A friend of mine, a dedicated golfer, shot a hole in one playing by himself. Disaster. ~ William Glasser

Ben Hogan is the most merciless of all the modern golfers. ~ Gene Sarazen

Sometimes a strikeout means that the slugger's girlfriend just ran off with the UPS driver. Sometimes a muffed ground ball means that the shortstop's baby daughter has a pain in her head that won't go away. And handicapping is for amateur golfers, not ballplayers. Pitchers don't ease off on the cleanup hitter because of the lumps just discovered in his wife's breast. Baseball is not life. It is a fiction, a metaphor. And a ballplayer is a man who agrees to uphold that metaphor as though lives were at stake.

Perhaps they are. I cherish a theory I once heard propounded by G.Q. Durham that professional baseball is inherently antiwar. The most overlooked cause of war, his theory runs, is that it's so damned interesting. It takes hard effort, skill, love and a little luck to make times of peace consistently interesting. About all it takes to make war interesting is a life. The appeal of trying to kill others without being killed yourself, according to Gale, is that it brings suspense, terror, honor, disgrace, rage, tragedy, treachery and occasionally even heroism within range of guys who, in times of peace, might lead lives of unmitigated blandness. But baseball, he says, is one activity that is able to generate suspense and excitement on a national scale, just like war. And baseball can only be played in peace. Hence G.Q.'s thesis that pro ball-players - little as some of them may want to hear it - are basically just a bunch of unusually well-coordinated guys working ~ David James Duncan

Golfers are the greatest worriers in the world of sport. ~ Billy Casper

The Epson M-Tracer provides real-time feedback and immediate solutions that help golfers develop a more efficient and powerful swing. This information empowers golfers to improve their swing in an easy and intuitive manner, ultimately resulting in lower scores and more fun. ~ David Leadbetter

In golf, you keep your head down and follow through. In the vice presidency, you keep your head up and follow through. It's a big difference. ~ Dan Quayle

Among golfers the putter is usually known as the payoff club and how right that is! Putting is in fact a game in itself. ~ Bobby Locke

I admire the way golfers handle themselves. But tennis players are a lot younger, as a rule. There aren't many teenagers on the golf tour. ~ Pete Sampras

I'm in the woods so much I can tell you which plants are edible. ~ Lee Trevino

Every golfer has at least 14 enemies: his clubs. ~ Dan Jenkins

On a recent survey, 80 percent of golfers admitted cheating. The other 20 percent lied. ~ Bruce Lansky

The least thing upset him on the links. He missed short putts because of the uproar of the butterflies in the adjoining meadows. ~ P.G. Wodehouse

At first a golfer excuses a dismal performance by claiming bad lies. With experience, he covers up with better ones. ~ Lee P. Brown

I consider myself as a character actor. I like the sports analogy, which I do all the time; I'm an avid sports guy. I'm a golfer, but I grew up as sort of an avid fan and participant in baseball, and I'm like a relief pitcher. My job is to come in and throw strikes. ~ Clint Howard

We tournament golfers are much overrated. We get paid to much. ~ Tom Watson

St. Andrews is the Home of Golf and the greatest course in the world. Any time you can win at St. Andrews would be special. It's every golfer's dream to win out here. ~ Peter Uihlein

The world's No. 1 tennis player spends 90 percent of his time winning, while the world's No. 1 golfer spends 90 percent of his time losing. Golfers are great losers. ~ David Feherty

Like most professional golfers, I have a tendency to remember my poor shots a shade more vividly than the good ones. ~ Ben Hogan

You can, legally, possibly hit and kill a fellow golfer with a ball, and there will not be a lot of trouble because the other golfers will refuse to stop and be witnesses because they will want to keep playing. ~ Dave Barry

Everybody can see that my swing is homegrown. That means everybody has a chance to do it. ~ Bubba Watson

A good player who is a great putter is a match for any golfer. A great hitter who cannot putt is a match for no one. ~ Ben Sayers

I am the toughest golfer mentally. ~ Tiger Woods

The idea that a game is anything more than a game ... You know, there are people who are basically unbalanced who are going to misuse a game and have bad results. If a golfer who insists on playing during a lightning storm gets hit by a stroke of lightning and is killed nobody says, 'There's golfers dying by the droves being hit by lightning!' You can overdo what you really like, and if you're unbalanced you go overboard. ~ Gary Gygax

Yeah, after each of my downhill putts. ~ Homero Blancas

Who listens to golfers? They're boring. If I want to wear camouflage on the golf course during a tournament, I will. And I have. ~ Bubba Watson

Duffers who consistently shank their balls are urged to buy and study Shanks - No Thanks by R.K. Hoffman, or in extreme cases, M.S. Howard's excellent Tennis for Beginners. ~ Henry Beard

Few golfers are born with the natural talent for hitting the ball, but every player is blessed with the God-given ability to throw a club. ~ Henry Beard

In golf as in life, it's the follow through that makes the difference. ~ Ben Wicks

This is what I love to do. And if pressure is something that comes with playing good golf, that's something a professional golfer has to handle. ~ Inbee Park

Divas do it, golfers do it, pilots do it, violists do it, sprinters do it, soldiers do it, surgeons do it, astronauts do it ... only business people think it isn't necessary to train. ~ Tom Peters

The devoted golfer is an anguished soul who has learned a lot about putting just as an avalanche victim has learned a lot about snow. ~ Dan Jenkins

To win a major championship - I think, at the end of the day, that's what a golfer's career is based upon. ~ Adam Derek Scott

Water creates a neurosis in golfers. The very thought of this harmless fluid robs them of their normal powers of rational thought, turns their legs to jelly, and produces a palsy of the upper limbs. ~ Peter Dobereiner

I build confidence when I practice a variety of shots - hitting it high or low, working the ball. A lot of golfers go to the range and just hit full shots. That doesn't build on-course confidence, because you won't always hit full shots out there. My confidence is built on knowing I can effectively work the ball in any circumstance. ~ JoAnne Carner

The Masters is one of golf's greatest traditions and Augusta is one of the best courses in the world. They are synonymous. It's an event that every golfer, and golf fan, looks forward to. ~ Mike Weir

In America, if you want to make it as a golfer, you go to college on a scholarship. In Australia, you go to the airport with a plane ticket. The competition just isn't there. ~ Stuart Appleby

I think golfers get over-concerned about results. Enjoy the process: enjoy the opportunity to play. ~ Wendy Ward

Sandy: Carl I want you to kill all the gophers on the golf course.
Carl Spackler: Correct me if I'm wrong Sandy, but if I kill all the golfers they'll lock me up and throw away the key.
Sandy: Not golfers, you great fool. Gophers. The little brown, furry rodents.
Carl Spackler: We can do that. We don't even need a reason. ~ Carl Spackler

While I am flattered about the speculation of being enticed out of retirement, I'm happy with life as a bad golfer! ~ Chipper Jones

I think the image of golfers is terrific, and rightly so. ~ Pete Sampras

Golfing with Eisman wasn't like golfing with other Wall Street people. The round usually began with a collective discomfort on the first tee, after Eisman turned up wearing something that violated the Wall Street golfer's notion of propriety. ~ Michael Lewis

There are two things you can do with your head down - play golf and pray. ~ Lee Trevino

The successful golfers - they're like astronauts or pilots. They have that demeanor that they can focus and stay within that one moment and nothing distracts them. That's not me. ~ Ray Romano

The president I came to know best was George Herbert Walker Bush. No. 41 in your program, No. 1 on your list of fast-playing golfers. ~ Dan Jenkins

You know the world is messed up when the tallest man in the NBA is Chinese, the best golfer is black, and the best rapper is white. ~ Chris Rock

Golfers should not fail to realize that it is a game of great traditions, of high ideals of sportsmanship, one in which a strict adherence to the rules is essential. ~ Francis Ouimet

I've never been one to throw clubs, break clubs, or use bad language on the golf course. I've played with golfers who've done that, and I really hate to see it. If I did something like that, my dad would come get the putter and hit me upside the head with it. I knew better. ~ Lucas Black

No golfer's journey is complete without a pilgrimage to St. Andrews, the mecca of the game. This is where it all began, back in the 15th and 16th centuries. ~ Alex Shoumatoff

Ron Sirak, a golf writer and friend, was quoted as saying, "Annika is no longer a female golfer. She's a golfer." That's truly all I ever aspired to be. ~ Annika Sorenstam

I'm not much of a golfer, I don't have any friends and all I like to do is go home and be alone, and not worry about ways not to lose. ~ Bear Bryant

All I've got against golf is it takes you so far from the clubhouse. ~ Eric Linklater

Never give a golfer an ultimatum unless you're prepared to lose. ~ Pauline Phillips

Only one golfer in a thousand grips the club lightly enough. ~ Johnny Miller

It is not mere technical skill that makes a man a golfer, it is the golfing soul. ~ P.G. Wodehouse

Our view is that the very best data miners or statisticians can earn as much as the very best golfers or tennis players. ~ Anthony Goldbloom

When human beings stop progressing at an endeavor, they stop enjoying it and move on to something else. Not golfers. Masochists, all of them. ~ Jay Mohr

I talk to golfers, I talk to my grand kids about their game, and tell them to develop a system, Now, when they're young. And if they develop that system, it will be the crutch they need to be good. To know that system and make it work for you, know what it is and make it work. ~ Arnold Palmer

Some golfers fantasize about playing in a foursome with Arnold Palmer, Jack Nicklaus, and Sam Snead. The way I hit I'd rather play in a foursome with Helen Keller, Ray Charles, and Stevie Wonder. ~ Bruce Lansky

They were real golfers, for real golf is a thing of the spirit, not of mere mechanical excellence of stroke. ~ P.G. Wodehouse

Golf camaraderie, like that of astronauts and Antarctic explorers, is based on a common experience of transcendence; fat or thin, scratch or duffer, we have been somerwhere together where non-golfers never go. ~ John Updike

Think Indonesia and tourism, and the first thing that comes to mind is probably Bali. Think golf holiday, and most people would dream of Scotland or Ireland. But Indonesia harbors one of the best-kept secrets in the world of travel: it is a golfer's paradise. ~ Raymond Bonner

When we watch pro golfers, we expect them to play well, to make the shots we know we can't, and to be entertaining. Their expectation, however, is very different. They expect to succeed! ~ Lorii Myers

It was sort of just a family sport. My mom and dad were pretty keen golfers when I was young and so were my grandparents, and I just sort of tagged along with them. ~ Karrie Webb

Golfers don't fist fight. They cuss a bit. But they wouldn't punch anything or anybody. They might hurt their hands and have to change their grip. ~ Dan Jenkins

Give me a man with big hands and big feet and no brains and I'll make a golfer out of him. ~ Walter Hagen

Mulligan: invented by an Irishman who wanted to hit one more twenty yard grounder. ~ Jim Bishop

Over the years I've studied the habits of golfers. I know what to look for. Watch their eyes. Fear shows up when there is an enlargement of the pupils. Big pupils lead to big scores. ~ Sam Snead

There's a reason why golfers walk forward to their next shot. It's to move on. ~ J.R. Rim

If there is any larceny in a man, golf will bring it out. ~ Paul Gallico

No other game combines the wonder of nature with the discipline of sport in such carefully planned ways. A great golf course both frees and challenges a golfer's mind. ~ Tom Watson

Statisticians estimate that crime among good golfers is lower than in any class of the community except possibly bishops. ~ P.G. Wodehouse

There are a number of golfers who are playing great golf in their 40s. ~ Retief Goosen

Our problem with President Obama isn't that he's a bad person. By all accounts, he too is a good husband, and a good father - and thanks to lots of practice, a pretty good golfer. ~ Marco Rubio

Now, I was well aware that certain sports required certain modes of dress for protection, but I failed to see how wearing a sleeveless blouse on the course qualified as a safety hazard. God forbid the sight of my bare shoulders should send male golfers into a tizzy, knocking balls everywhere. ~ Kelley Armstrong

The biggest liar in the world is the golfer who claims he plays the game for exercise. ~ Tommy Bolt

If you pick up a golfer and hold it close to your ear, like a conch shell, and listen, you will hear an alibi. ~ Fred Beck

I hadn't thought that women were particularly dangerous golfers. Could that be the reason that the Augusta National Golf club refuses to take down its 'No Women Allowed' sign? ~ Madeleine M. Kunin

If golfers know they look good, they will play better. I think that is valid for men and women. ~ Letitia Baldrige

Dare to be a sucky skateboarder or a lousy video editor or a completely crappy golfer. If we do only the stuff we're good at, we never learn anything new. ~ Justin Bieber

Race horses are like golfers, you're never sure how they're going to come out of the stalls. It's just - hopefully the horses come out of the race all right, just fit and ready to go again in the near future, but 3rd was good. It's paid for its hay. ~ Lee Westwood

I may be the only golfer never to have broken a single putter, if you don't count the one I twisted into a loop and threw into a bush. ~ Thomas Boswell

I'm a golfer - not an athlete. ~ Lee Westwood

Golf isn't like other sports where you can take a player out if he's having a bad day. You have to play the whole game. ~ Phil Blackmar

Have you ever actually listened to golfers talking to each other? "Looked good starting out ... " "Better direction than last time ... " "Who's away? ... " It sounds like visitors' day at a home for the criminally insane. ~ Peter Andrews

No one who ever had lessons would have a swing like mine. ~ Lee Trevino

Once when I was golfing in Georgia, I hooked the ball into the swamp. I went in after it and found an alligator wearing a shirt with a picture of a little golfer on it. ~ Buddy Hackett

Golfers who play a lot of courses often encounter short ledges or retaining walls, and I always had fun hopping down from them. I could jump off something six feet high and land like a cat, no problem. Well, today I can't jump off anything higher than two feet without it just killing me. ~ Tom Watson

You can't call it a sport. You don't run, jump, you don't shoot, you don't pass. All you have to do is buy some clothes that don't match. ~ Steve Sax

I never mixed with golfers when I was playing, mainly because I didn't want to talk golf all night. ~ Nick Faldo

This is the great thing about Northern Ireland. I walk down the street and people stop me and say things like, 'I know you. You're that wee golfer, aren't you?' I say, 'Yeah, that's me.' They say, 'Keep it up, wee man.' It's very funny and that's why I want to stay here as long as possible. ~ Rory McIlroy

Golfers don't scream. Golfers just adjust the pleats in their pants and go from there. That's about as antagonistic as we get. ~ Gary McCord

You're never going to be a Yankee for a day, or you're never going to be a Laker, but with Pro-Ams, they allow you to feel like you're a professional golfer and play under their conditions. ~ George Lopez

One thing about golf is you don't know why you play bad and why you play good. ~ George Archer