Funny Twins Quotes

George," said Fred, "I think we've outgrown full-time education."
"Yeah, I've been feeling that way myself," said George lightly. ~ J.K. Rowling

Everyone's fascinated by twins - the bond between them, the way they communicate - "
"He yells 'Hey, stupid!' That's how Charlie communicates with me."
"Very funny. Come on, it's a great idea! And since I know you both so well, I won't feel weird interviewing you. It can be an in-depth, sensitive, soul-searching kind of thing."
"Charlie has no depth." Frowning, Emma considered the matter, then shook her head. "The soul part I'm not so sure about, but you can definitely rule out sensitive. ~ Richie Tankersley Cusick

An Irishman's wife gave birth to twins. Her husband wanted to know who the other man was. ~ Frank Carson

The Gullikson twins here. An interesting pair, both from Wisconsin. ~ Dan Maskell

When I was a boy, I laid in my twin-sized bed and wondered where my brother was. ~ Mitch Hedberg

Was already different because I was a twin. Funny how you can say that: I am a twin. Not I am one of twins, but I actually am A Twin. Like there's two of me all the time, this other one right here beside me whether you can see him or not. Or as if you're saying, I'm a Half. ~ Niall Williams

If it doesn't have siamese twins in a jar, it is not a fair. ~ Homer

And it started out fun. We were chattering enthusiastically, flipping between CNN, MSNBC, and FOX News. But as the evening wore on, and the numbers rolled in, it got quieter, and I found myself becoming intensely depressed. Why was I putting myself through this? The issues I've devoted my life to have become so marginalized by the coverage that they have no possible relevance to me. I can't even blame the media - people simply don't care about alternate-party politics. And why should they? I'm so far in the minority that my activism is a joke, a punchline that stopped being funny years ago. It goes beyond rooting for the underdog. It's not rooting for the Giants: it's more like, say, rooting for the Twins. But during the Super Bowl. ~ Phillip Andrew Bennett Low

With identical twins, you always get a little snidey one. ~ Karl Pilkington

I call my balls the bush twins. ~ Zach Galifianakis

Sire," Oliver said as he helped Petunia to her feet, "I'd like to marry Petunia.
"Of course you would," retorted the King Gregor. "But not right now! we just got those two taken care of." He pointed to the twins who were still trying to play Christian's odd game. "And weddings are expensive! ~ Jessica Day George

I'm writing a book about Siamese Twins that are attached at the nose. It's called: Stop Staring at Me! ~ Zach Galifianakis

Wow, we're identical! ~ J.K. Rowling