Funny Paratrooper Quotes

In Italy the Coach is a paratrooper who jumps out of the plane but doesn't know if the parachute will open or not. ~ Claudio Ranieri

Once I heard a young paratrooper instructor explain, "The jump really isn't so bad. It's the waiting to jump that gets a fellow. ~ David J. Schwartz

I have jumped out of airplanes but I was not technically a paratrooper. I was an infantryman and a night fighter, anti-terrorist. ~ Mark Helprin

Some lucky people can be funny without half trying because they actually look funny, because acting funny is in their bones - fun as funny, not funny as crude slapstick. ~ F. Sionil Jose

The problem is that we live in an uptight country. Why don't we just laugh at ourselves? We are funny. Gays are funny. Straights are funny. Women are funny. Men are funny. We are all funny, and we all do funny things. Let's laugh about it. ~ Bob Newhart

If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends? ~ Steven Wright

Mama does everything for the baby, who responds by saying Dada first. ~ Mignon McLaughlin

I always was a funny guy, the class clown. I had a very funny dad and an extremely funny grandmother. ~ Charlie Day

Slap-stick comedy is really funny, unless you're the one getting slapped with the stick. ~ Carroll Bryant

It's really easy to be funny. You get a lot of funny people in a room, the show is funny. ~ Jill Soloway

You know, Lincoln was funny. I don't think F.D.R. was very funny. But Lincoln was funny. Lincoln was really funny. But I think you should get elected first, and then show that you're funny. ~ Al Franken

I find Anders very funny and funny lasts forever." Samantha ~ Angela Nicoara

Life before toilet paper was not worth living. ~ Sherrilyn Kenyon

being funny is actually all about thinking "what if ?" in a creative way. ~ Shashankbisht

I'm not funny. People assume that because my books are funny, I'll be funny in real life. It's the inevitable disappointment of meeting me. ~ Jonathan Safran Foer

Ish #109 If MapQuest says make a right, go straight. You'll get there quicker. ~ Regina Griffin

We can't against human stupidity. Because they are too many and too dangerous. ~ Nobita Nobi

The hardest years in life are those between ten and seventy. ~ Helen Hayes

I like funny things, but I don't find myself particularly funny. ~ Chris Messina

Ish #21 Stop saying the only meat you eat is chicken. It's still meat! ~ Regina Griffin

I never know when I am being funny, and the other way too. I don't think you can think about that. I don't think you can try to be funny. Some people are just funny. ~ Christopher Walken

The only time a woman really succeeds in changing a man is when he's a baby. ~ Natalie Wood

Boy, those French! They have a different word for everything. ~ Steve Martin

I've never set out to write a funny movie or be a funny comedian as a woman. I am a woman. I don't really have a choice in the matter. My goal is just to be funny. ~ Maya Rudolph

Funny is only something that others know about you - you can't be funny by yourself. ~ Chris Rock

As I get older, I just prefer to knit. ~ Tracey Ullman

When you don't have a laugh track, you can make the clothes funny. We can make a sign funny. We can make the way somebody walks funny. The makeup can be funny. ~ Mitchell Hurwitz

I have funny bones. If there's ever any kind of tension, I'll always be the one to try and be funny to loosen things up. ~ Matt LeBlanc

Making modern games funny would be easy as pie if it was anybody's goal to actually make a funny game. ~ Doug TenNapel

I grew up with an extremely funny dad, and my mom is super funny. ~ Paula Pell

You know ... there is a name for people who are always wrong about everything all the time ... husband!!! ~ Bill Maher

But I think once the word gets out that the movie is funny - funny is transcendent - it will traverse all demographic barriers if people embrace it as a funny movie. ~ Thomas Haden Church

The funny thing is, Dennis Miller got me back into comedy. ~ Tommy Chong

There are no funny lawyers - only funny people who made a career mistake. ~ Robert J. White

I do jokes about what's funny, and both sides are funny. ~ Mark Russell

If you keep yourself alive and current, funny is funny. ~ Alan King

Comedy, your funny bone, is formed in childhood. ~ Paul O'Grady

I always believe that funny is serious and serious is funny. You don't really need a distinction between them. ~ Trevor Noah

I come from a long line of miserable people. ~ Arlene Schindler

Comedy should never be over-analysed. It's either funny or it isn't. There's a subtle difference between those who say funny things and those who say things funny. ~ Ken Dodd

Between lovers a little confession is a dangerous thing. ~ Helen Rowland

Forty million Americans smoked marijuana; the only ones who didn't like it were Judge Ginsberg, Clarence Thomas and Bill Clinton. ~ Jay Leno

I think you figure out how to be funny by necessity. It's not a natural thing, being funny in the face of tragedy is kind of demented. ~ Julie Brown

You think you're funny." "Oh, I know I'm funny. Unappreciated, but funny. ~ Jim Butcher

When something is truly funny, it's funny all the time. ~ Cloris Leachman

I wasn't particularly funny in high school, but I grew up with three older brothers who were quite funny. ~ Ryan Stiles

Some actors try to play parts and do things they can't do. Being funny is one of them. Being funny's hard. ~ Tom Sizemore

I'm always more motivated by the pain of a funny character than by what makes him funny. ~ Jason Alexander

You're funny.
Funny peculiar or funny ha-ha?
A bit of both, I think. ~ E.L. James

My parents were funny. My brothers were funny. We just laughed and had a good time. Growing up, it breeds that. It breeds your funny. It breeds your creativity. ~ Kym Whitley

There's only one true superpower amongst human beings, and that is being funny. People treat you differently if you can make them laugh. ~ Jeff Garlin

Marriage is the only war in which you sleep with the enemy. ~ Francois De La Rochefoucauld

I'm not a comedian. I don't make things funny if they're not funny. I don't invent funny stuff. ~ Morgan Freeman

I don't get a chance to be funny with the thrillers. I like to be funny, and I think I am really funny. So with 'Middle School: The Worst Years of My Life', it was fun to let loose. ~ James Patterson

Although there are many trial marriages ... there is no such thing as a trial child. ~ Gail Sheehy

I am funny. No one else thinks I am funny. But I am funny. ~ Lorraine Bracco

If you're going to tell people the truth, be funny or they'll kill you. ~ Billy Wilder

I was funny around my family. My family, they're pretty funny, too. ~ Wanda Sykes

The decision as to what's funny and what is not funny shall rest solely with Mr. Freberg. ~ Stan Freberg

Somebody dies and people eat your food. Funny how that works. ~ Sherman Alexie

Chemistry's a funny thing. It can be instantaneous, but it helps when you know someone. ~ David Walton

I am accusing him of stealing my best material, he was a very funny man. ~ Frank Carson

It's not about trying to be funny all the time. It's more of a document that hopefully is funny. ~ David Cross

The hardest part, for real, is probably when you just don't feel like going on stage and being funny. ~ Greg Giraldo

You know what they say about big hitters ... the woods are full of them. ~ Jimmy Demaret

This many pretty girls in the room, all watching you boys like you're a wedding-reception one-night stand waiting to happen - ~ Cristin Harber

I certainly do not drink all the time. I have to sleep you know. ~ W.C. Fields

If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something. ~ Steven Wright

It's funny how a hello is always accompanied with a goodbye. It's funny how good memories can make you cry, it's funny how forever never seems to last, it's funny how much you would lose if you forgot about your past, it's funny how friends can just leave when you're down, it's funny how when you need someone they never are around, it's funny how people change and think they're so much better, it's funny how some many lies are packed into one love letter, it's funny how one night can hold so much regret, it's funny how you can forgive but not forget, it's funny how ironic life turns out to be, but the funniest part of all, is that none of that is funny to me. ~ Auliq Ice

I don't have to be bam, bam, bam, funny when I'm working. I can tell stories, and there's some funny in them. ~ Whoopi Goldberg

I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, natural, wholesome things that money can buy. ~ Steve Martin

There is definitely a pressure for funny people to be funny. People want them to perform all the time. ~ Marsha Thomason

I think the second you think that you're funny is when you stop being funny. ~ Mila Kunis

Funny is funny is funny. ~ Bob Newhart

I moved to New York to do theater, and I got cast in a play that was funny, and then I was the funny guy. I did a movie that was funny, and then I was the funny guy. ~ Steve Zahn

I find my fans are really funny people. Most comedians can't say that about their fans. ~ Mike Birbiglia

When I was in improv workshops or doing stand-up or writing comedy with others, or just doing comedy, I just laughed. Funny was funny; I loved to laugh. I always liked people I found generally funny. ~ Michael Keaton

Comedy is learning to be funny, and you learn to be funny in small rooms with young audiences. ~ Joan Rivers

The trick is always to write in pairs because if at least two people find it funny, you've immediately halved the odds of it not being funny. ~ Steve Coogan

I love funny people, and when I'm with funny people, or people who are amusing in their weirdness, I love it. Because that to me is funny, as opposed to someone who stops and says, 'Hey let me tell you a joke.' ~ Paul Feig

I'm not a naturally funny man. I find that I can only be funny, if I become someone else. ~ Rowan Atkinson

A bachelor's life is no life for a single man. ~ Samuel Goldwyn

Life is a blank canvas, and you need to throw all the paint on it you can. ~ Danny Kaye

There are a lot of funny women in my life. I never understand those movies where there's eight funny guys and two women who don't have any opinion or humour. ~ Melissa McCarthy

I love to do comedy, and I don't think of things as drama or comedy. I think that if it's a funny line, it's a funny line. If it's a funny moment, it's a funny moment. ~ Kathy Baker

Cool is the enemy of funny. You can't be cool and be funny at the same time. Only Eddie Murphy could do that. ~ Tracy Morgan

Funny is funny, and it can come in 8 billion different shades and flavors, so I think it's silly to kind of limit it. ~ Melissa McCarthy

I've got all the money I'll ever need. If I die by 4:00. ~ Henny Youngman

To the U.S. and the world, I'm just known as some funny song and some funny music, some funny video guy. But in Korea I'm doing one of the biggest concerts; it's not a dance music concert. I'm playing with the band, so I change my every song to a rock song. ~ Psy

Dead people are just great. Meet me when you are. ~ Fakeer Ishavardas

He who laughs last, thinks slowest. ~ Larry The Cable Guy

My wife has a slight impediment in her speech. Every now and then she stops to breathe. ~ Jimmy Durante

If something is shocking without being funny it's hard to justify. ~ Seth MacFarlane

Funny is the world I live in. You're funny, I'm interested. You're not funny, I'm not interested. ~ Jerry Seinfeld

People often ask me how I make things funny. I don't make things funny. ~ Richard Russo

I've just seen really, really funny guys, and if I didn't know them, I wouldn't know they were funny from the television. I don't know what it does, it just sucks it away. ~ Norm MacDonald

How am I going to explain to my kids one day that I can't buy them a happy meal because the toy will make them fat? ~ Carroll Bryant

I don't really find things funny unless they're deeply tragic at the same time. I think if you're funny just for the sake of being funny, it's just frivolous nonsense. To me, all the best comic plays have been written about really serious and rather bleak things. ~ Lee Hall

Thing is, I'm a funny actor, but I'm not good at being funny. I'm going to ramble for a second: I'm an actor who can make things funny in the moment, like in stakes or in circumstances or out of character. ~ Matthew Lillard

The funny thing about stop signs is that they're also start signs. ~ Maureen Johnson