Demotivational Quotes

Life is only logical, and to think it's a gift is depressing. ~ Konrad

Food for thought: Every dead body on Mount Everest was once a highly motivated person. Stay lazy my friends. It may save your life one day. ~ Oliver Markus Malloy

Try & try until you cannot succeed. ~ Self

Just imagine how terrible it might have been if we'd been at all competent. ~ Terry Pratchett

Sex is mathematics. Individuality no longer an issue. What does intelligence signify? Define reason. Desire - meaningless. Intellect is not a cure. Justice is dead. ~ Bret Easton Ellis

Nothing says "you're a loser" more than owning a motivational poster about being a winner. ~ Justin Sewell

When you wish upon a falling star, your dreams can come true. Unless it's really a meteor hurtling to the Earth which will destroy all life. Then you're pretty much hosed no matter what you wish for. Unless it's death by meteorite. ~ Justin Sewell

CONSULTING: If you're not a part of the solution, there's good money to be made in prolonging the problem. ~ Justin Sewell

Life is a bitch. Not even the bitch that fucks everyone but you. She's the bitch with AIDS that doesn't want to fuck anyone but you. ~ Adam Ketcheson

Ede says we should post some demotivational phrases on our Facebook pages. I can't therefore I am. To be is to be condemned. The universe is a mistake. Hope is a kind of delirium. We don't live even once. Dead days outnumber live ones. The use of philosophy is to sadden. Existence has never answered our questions. Death is the least of our problems. ~ Lars Iyer

The United States was a big country where everybody wore funny t-shirts and ate too much. ~ Adam Rex

Although some people think women are inferior to men, I think it's a privilege to be a woman. There are so many fun things afforded to the female gender such as adornment of self, the freedom to communicate with gestures, and the freedom to express one's emotions.
I don't know what I'd do without my red backpack purse, and I am attached to my PDA with the pink monogrammed leather case. I've developed favorites among the many items in my wardrobe, and I like experimenting with accessories like hats, scarves, watches and belts.
I've become fairly proficient at applying make-up, and I now know the importance of a good facial cleanser and moisturizer. ~ Jessica Angelina Birch

everything is normal we have our tv and mcdonalds people wash their cars on their driveways on a sunday afternoon and mow their lawns hang pictures of their blonde blue-eyed children neatly on magnolia walls and in the future everyone will sidestep questions speak with the vapidity of politicians in a limited language devoid of passion and truth and in the future air-raid sirens will sound every time the sun comes out and no one will ever put a bullet in the head of a politician again everything will be bland and painless and whitewashed and the government will finally have won completely ~ U.V. Ray

TEAMWORK: A few harmless flakes working together can unleash an avalanche of destruction. ~ Justin Sewell

Accept that you're just a product, not a gift. ~ Konrad