Dark Humor Quotes

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Quotes About Dark Humor

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In 5-billion years the Sun will expand & engulf our orbit as the charred ember that was once Earth vaporizes. Have a nice day. ~ Neil DeGrasse Tyson
Dark Humor quotes by Neil DeGrasse Tyson
тот что нас не убивает нас не интересует. 'That which cannot kill us does not interest us.' Exhaling poison, he explains, 'Nice sentiment shared by thieves and Bratva. ~ Tanya Thompson
Dark Humor quotes by Tanya Thompson
It's so hard being goth. You have to have a bad time everywhere. ~ Clint Catalyst
Dark Humor quotes by Clint Catalyst
Although this scouting gig sounded like a financial hit, it made Nonie extremely nervous. She feared someone slip--that someone being Buggy--and others would find out Nonie's secret. And if the wrong person caught wind that she could see and speak to the dead, word would spread through Clay Point like ants at a picnic. ~ Deborah Leblanc
Dark Humor quotes by Deborah Leblanc
Give the wilding an axe, why not?" He pointed out Mormont's weapon, a short-hafted battle-axe with gold scrollwork inlaid on the black steel blade. "He'll give it back, I vow. Buried in the Old Bear's skull, like as not. why not give him all our axes, and our swords as well? I mislike the way the clank and rattle as we ride. We'd travel faster without them, straight to hell's door. Does it rain in hell, I wonder? Perhaps Craster would like a nice hat instead."
Jon smiled. "He wants an axe. And wine as well."
"See, the Old Bear's clever. If we get the wildling well and truly drunk, perhaps he'll only cut off an ear when he tries to slay us with that axe. I have two ears but only one head. ~ George R R Martin
Dark Humor quotes by George R R Martin
There is a moment of sheer panic when I realize that Paul's apartment overlooks the park ... and is obviously more expensive than mine. ~ Patrick Bateman
Dark Humor quotes by Patrick Bateman
I wonder if I could eat a child if I had the chance.'
'I doubt if I could cook one,' said Constance. ~ Shirley Jackson
Dark Humor quotes by Shirley Jackson
In the days that followed, the Baudelaire orphans had pits in their stomachs. In Sunny's case it was understandable, because when Klaus had divided the peach, she had gotten the part with the pit. ~ Lemony Snicket
Dark Humor quotes by Lemony Snicket
You are fifty different kinds of twisted."
"Only fifty? Val, you wound me. ~ Nenia Campbell
Dark Humor quotes by Nenia Campbell
All life is in vain, for Death makes a nonsense of pain. ~ Gasmaskman
Dark Humor quotes by Gasmaskman
I get diarrhea more often than the average Muslim. ~ Magnus Wilton
Dark Humor quotes by Magnus Wilton
Ordinarily, anyone who made such a remark to my face would go to the top of my short list for strychnine. ~ Alan Bradley
Dark Humor quotes by Alan Bradley
The four hearse-horses, especially, reared and pranced, and showed their highest action, as if they knew a man was dead, and triumphed in it. "The break us, drive us, ride us; ill-treat, abuse, and maim us for their pleasure - But they die; Hurrah, they die! ~ Charles Dickens
Dark Humor quotes by Charles Dickens
That's wonderful news" Clairmont said. "Can you get this lady some tea when you have a chance? She's threatened to kill for it."
"Won't be necessary, dearie," Mary told me with a smile. "We serve tea without bloodshed. ~ Deborah Harkness
Dark Humor quotes by Deborah Harkness
The rest of us can find happiness in misery. ~ Fall Out Boy
Dark Humor quotes by Fall Out Boy
Beyond all of that, I could see the wall I had seen from inside the train, the wall that runs along the train line. I assumed that there, behind it, was the west, and I was right. I could have been wrong, but I was right.' If she had any future it was over there, and she needed to get to it.
I sit in the chair exploring the meaning of dumbstruck, rolling the word around in my mind. I laugh with Miriam as she laughs at herself, and at the boldness of being sixteen. At sixteen you are invulnerable. I laugh with her about rummaging around for a ladder in other people's sheds, and I laugh harder when she finds one. We laugh at the improbability of it, of someone barely more than a child poking around in Beatrix Potter's garden by the Wall, watching out for Mr McGregor and his blunderbuss, and looking for a step-ladder to scale one of the most fortified barriers on earth. We both like the girl she was, and I like the woman she has become.
She says suddenly, 'I still have the scars on my hands from climbing the barbed wire, but you can't see them so well now.' She holds out her hands. The soft parts of her palms are crazed with definite white scares, each about a centimeter long.
The first fence was wire mesh with a roll of barbed wire along the top. ~ Anna Funder
Dark Humor quotes by Anna Funder
When people asked about his schizophrenia, Eric, who didn't exactly flaunt his illness but wasn't ashamed of it, either, offered up the comparison of alcoholism. Not every drunk is a single bourbon away from skid row, just like every schizophrenic is not a tatty-haired, crazy-eyed gunman who delights in murdering alien-people from clock towers. There are functioning alcoholics just as there are functioning schizophrenics, individuals who work, maintain homes, and have hobbies, goals, and relationships like every other slob on the planet. ~ Vivian Barz
Dark Humor quotes by Vivian Barz
Pete?" I say, my voice crackling. "Please don't die."
Pete gives me a dazzling smile and bows. "To die will be an awfully big adventure." He blows me a kiss and pulls the heavy door shut with a metallic clank, leaving me alone in the dark. ~ Wendy Spinale
Dark Humor quotes by Wendy Spinale
The general plot of life is sometimes shaped by the different ways genuine intelligence combines with equally genuine ignorance. ~ Lucy Grealy
Dark Humor quotes by Lucy Grealy
When Roy began to pace, smart people hid. ~ Madeline Pryce A.K.A. FAyth Devlin
Dark Humor quotes by Madeline Pryce A.K.A. FAyth Devlin
I like dark humor. My favorite movie of all time is 'Harold and Maude.' ~ Leslie Mann
Dark Humor quotes by Leslie Mann
He took a long draw then asked, "What'd I do?"
"You knew about the guy threatening my dad?"
He paused, shifted in his chair, so freaking busted, it wasn't funny. "They told you?"
"Why, no, Swopes, they didn't. Instead, they waited until the guy knocked the fuck out of my dad and readied him for spaceflight with duct tape then tried to kill me with a butcher's knife. ~ Darynda Jones
Dark Humor quotes by Darynda Jones
I guess all my afternoon beers and burgers were catching up with me, which made me want to scream THEN WHY NOT MY HAIR!? ~ Jonas Eriksson
Dark Humor quotes by Jonas Eriksson
I tried to find a word for it in my thesaurus, but there isn't one. At least, not one that doesn't belittle the plight of POWs and victims of famine. I guess we can just call it beyond suck. -Lulu Dark ~ Bennett Madison
Dark Humor quotes by Bennett Madison
Drainage tubes ran out of his belly and side, and there was a catheter the size of a pencil coming out his penis. Nothing particularly hurt, so he had to assume he was on pretty nearly all the narcotics there were. ~ James S.A. Corey
Dark Humor quotes by James S.A. Corey
I firmly disagree with anyone who says humans are the most advanced, or the most intelligent species on the planet. In fact, only three animals have ever threatened to kill me: humans, their dogs, and a particularly aggressive species of house spider. ~ Israel Morrow
Dark Humor quotes by Israel Morrow
Try & try until you cannot succeed. ~ Self
Dark Humor quotes by Self
Bah-Bah-black sheep, have you any soul?
No sir, by the way, what the hell are morals? ~ Set It Off
Dark Humor quotes by Set It Off
I'll just do a round around of the house and make sure the rest of the family are fast asleep. We don't want that sharp-nosed aunt of yours catching us when we find the diamonds." "What diamonds?" "Think positive for once ... Which would you rather, diamonds or the remains of a murdered maidservant? It's all a question of attitude. ~ Kerstin Gier
Dark Humor quotes by Kerstin Gier
The contrast between the friendly greeting and the weapons propped against their shoulders is almost humorous. ~ Veronica Roth
Dark Humor quotes by Veronica Roth
Most people don't understand what humor is. They think it's something lighthearted and cheerful. Like 'good humor.' But it isn't. It's looking into the darkness and spitting at it with a joke. Humor is dark. Humor is that we're all going to die. ~ B.G. Harlen
Dark Humor quotes by B.G. Harlen
A flat screen television lowered into view. It showed an animated Islamic documentary that focused mostly on the importance of wearing the proper attire. The final prophet was quoted often, yet absent from the feature.
"If this Mohammed guy is so great, why wouldn't they put him in the cartoon?" Kira wondered. ~ Magnus Wilton
Dark Humor quotes by Magnus Wilton
They condemn our town. Separate it from their own, where the same secrets pulse. ~ T.E. Carter
Dark Humor quotes by T.E. Carter
Maybe tranquility is the dirt under my nails. I know it's there but I never feel like digging it out. ~ Casey Renee Kiser
Dark Humor quotes by Casey Renee Kiser
Heart condition? That's rich. I guess you can call a heart not beating a condition.-PJ ~ Nessie Strange
Dark Humor quotes by Nessie Strange
Rap un zeal' Demon within. I might as well put up a giant 'Come and Get Eaten' sign for the good those warning runes do. ~ Sabrina Zbasnik
Dark Humor quotes by Sabrina Zbasnik
There is sometimes a fine line between a cop and a criminal. What drives their personality may be the same, and they have simply chosen different roles and professions to call their own."

Dr. ML Rapier PhD, Clinical Psychologist. ~ M.L Rapier
Dark Humor quotes by M.L Rapier
(Eve)"Hold on. You have to give them a gift for moving?"
"Uh-huh. Plus they're shacking, so it should be a couple thing." She (Mavis) ate another canape, fed on to Leonardo.
"Why does there have to be a gift for every damn thing?" Eve complained.
"Retail conspiracy." Roarke patter her knee.
"I bet it is," Eve said darkly. "I just bet it is. ~ J.D. Robb
Dark Humor quotes by J.D. Robb
I love dark humor. I love things that are so grounded in life, but just happen to be just a little bit twisted because my sense of humor is a little bit twisted. I love jokes that shouldn't be funny, but are. Those types of things just really make me laugh. ~ Rockmond Dunbar
Dark Humor quotes by Rockmond Dunbar
You sick bastard," she said.
"Yes, I guess you could call me that." Terry replied. ~ Jonas Eriksson
Dark Humor quotes by Jonas Eriksson
I quite like dark humor. ~ Marina And The Diamonds
Dark Humor quotes by Marina And The Diamonds
DECAPITATION.
I simply love the word. Head over heels. ~ Ishbelle Bee
Dark Humor quotes by Ishbelle Bee
Nothing shows you the straight line from here to death like a list. ~ Chuck Palahniuk
Dark Humor quotes by Chuck Palahniuk
All I did was offer to kill your dog, and the next thing I know I'm being judged. ~ Tom Upton
Dark Humor quotes by Tom Upton
After the first week I knew every line, freckle and scar on his body. Some might call it obsessive. I called it having an attention to detail. I can't help it if I'm overly observant. ~ Madeline Pryce A.K.A. FAyth Devlin
Dark Humor quotes by Madeline Pryce A.K.A. FAyth Devlin
It all jibed, and the books would close on Jasper as death by misadventure. Unofficially, Eve labeled it death by stupidity, but there wasn't a place on the sheet for that particular observation. - Lt. Eve Dallas on a drunk fall off the roof ~ J.D. Robb
Dark Humor quotes by J.D. Robb
Think about the people who come here," Nick says. "Writers and artists, scientists and captains of industry. Think of all they give to the world. Now think of yourself, Jules. What are you? What do you offer? Nothing. ~ Riley Sager
Dark Humor quotes by Riley Sager
-You give her a three, he said ...
-That three was entirely fitting, I said. It was complete garbage. Not the kind of thing I expect the
students to hand in ... In addition to the Second World War, I also deal with a large part of the history that came afterwards,' I interrupted again. Korea, Vietnam, Kuwait, the Middle East and Israel, the Six-Day
War, the Yom Kippur War, the Palestinians. I deal with all of that during my classes. So then you
can't expect to turn in a paper about the state of Israel in which people mostly pick oranges and dance
in sandals around a campfire. Cheerful, happy people everywhere, and all that horseshit about the
desert where flowers blossom again. I mean, people are shot and killed there every day, buses are
blown up. What's this all about?
-She came in here crying, Paul.
-I'd cry too if I turned in garbage like that. ~ Herman Koch
Dark Humor quotes by Herman Koch
I was very strict on that point. No devouring classmates." Jeremy rolled his eyes. "Other parents warn their kids not to talk to strangers. I had to warn mine not to eat them. ~ Kelley Armstrong
Dark Humor quotes by Kelley Armstrong
Francis Ford Coppola - A man climbs a mountain and they call him a hero. I climb mountains that aren't even there. ~ Madeline Moore
Dark Humor quotes by Madeline Moore
You have to figure that there is something seriously wrong with somebody who wants to enter a profession that deals with whether people are screwing enough. Dealing with spirits, spooks, and demons almost seemed normal. ~ Tom Upton
Dark Humor quotes by Tom Upton
When God created fools he put the biggest of them into uniform and gave them helmets to prevent any thoughts entering their heads. ~ M. R. C. Kasasian
Dark Humor quotes by M. R. C. Kasasian
Something bad was about to happen. My wife was being clever again. ~ Gillian Flynn
Dark Humor quotes by Gillian Flynn
Bomb', Reyes said, not bothering to look up.
'One of ours?' Maddox insisted ...
'Hardly. I know better than to blow myself up,' Reyes sighed. ~ Gena Showalter
Dark Humor quotes by Gena Showalter
I'm as lucky as a bed of oysters on cioppino night. ~ Nenia Campbell
Dark Humor quotes by Nenia Campbell
He had to say that the thing he found most attractive about her was that she had tried to kill herself. Now that was interesting
sexy, almost, in a morbid kind of way. ~ Nick Hornby
Dark Humor quotes by Nick Hornby
I glanced up at the trees too.
Dead. Every one of them gray and white, needles rusted, leaves shriveled at the tips of branches. All the life sucked out of them. Not just the trees. All the plants, ferns, grasses and brush were shriveled, brown, barren.
As if a month of winter had set down right here in my driveway and gone on a killing spree.
...
"Love what you've done with the landscape," Cody said. "You could open your own business, you know."
...
"The hell you talking about, Miller?" I asked Cody.
"Yard care. You're poison and weed whacker all in one. You can call it Death to All Shrubbery. ~ Devon Monk
Dark Humor quotes by Devon Monk
Oh, precious losing streak,
you're too cute for your own good.
I try to laugh about it
but my face is made of wood. ~ Casey Renee Kiser
Dark Humor quotes by Casey Renee Kiser
There are fears that Britain could be facing a double-dip recession, or worse still, a double-dip with misery sprinkles and fuck-where's-my-job-sauce. ~ Frankie Boyle
Dark Humor quotes by Frankie Boyle
I want to make sure I remember what real ugly is. I might want to tell my grandchildren someday. ~ Stephen King
Dark Humor quotes by Stephen King
Shin: a device for finding furniture in the dark. ~ Steven Wright
Dark Humor quotes by Steven Wright
My parents watch too many soap operas, that's their trouble. In fact, they were probably hoping I was pregnant. By my wicked married lover whom they could then murder and bury under the patio. ~ Sophie Kinsella
Dark Humor quotes by Sophie Kinsella
Ah, 6655321, think on the divine suffering. Meditate on that, my boy.' And all the time he had this rich manny von of Scotch on him, and then he went off to his little cantora to peet some more. So I read all about the scourging and the crowning with thorns and then the cross veshch and all that cal, and I viddied better that there was something in it. While the stereo played bits of lovely Bach I closed my glazzies and viddied myself helping in and even taking charge of the tolchocking and the nailing in, being dressed in a like toga that was the heighth of Roman fashion. So being in Staja 84F was not all that wasted, and the Governor himself was very pleased to hear that I had taken to like Religion, and that was where I had my hopes. ~ Anthony Burgess
Dark Humor quotes by Anthony Burgess
Some things just scrape my spine! ~ Brick Marlin
Dark Humor quotes by Brick Marlin
It is important to correct bad behavior one toe at a time. ~ Gasmaskman
Dark Humor quotes by Gasmaskman
Justin vomited in his mouth a little as he gazed upon a sea of black outfits and sidelocks. They looked like they were ready for a heavy metal concert, a funeral, or the hell that is a Brit Milah. Fuck, they looked ridiculous. ~ Magnus Wilton
Dark Humor quotes by Magnus Wilton
Daddy is jive talking
and showering the stripper
Mommy is sleepwalking
while changing baby's diaper ~ Casey Renee Kiser
Dark Humor quotes by Casey Renee Kiser
If you want to convince a criminal to see things your way, start by seeing things theirs. ~ Aubrea Summer
Dark Humor quotes by Aubrea Summer
Where d'you get the knife?" He wished he had one.
"He gave it to me." There was a crumpled shape in the shadows by the wall, the matting all around soaked with dark blood. "This way. ~ Joe Abercrombie
Dark Humor quotes by Joe Abercrombie
The victim lay on his face, as most people did after being stuck with ten swords. ~ Maggie Stiefvater
Dark Humor quotes by Maggie Stiefvater
I don't think it's ever easy to be funny. I find it easy to amuse myself with a certain sort of cynical dark humor that tends toward the meaner side, like my character in Happy Gilmore. Those kinds of characters come easily to me. ~ Ben Stiller
Dark Humor quotes by Ben Stiller
The right hand doesn't know what the left is doing is a phrase that refers to times when people ought to know, but don't know, about something that is happening very close to them. For instance, you ought to know about the man who watches you when you sleep. ~ Lemony Snicket
Dark Humor quotes by Lemony Snicket
Sometimes I miss the people my characters were before I ruined their lives. ~ Victoria Schwab
Dark Humor quotes by Victoria Schwab
Despite my ghoulish reputation, I really have the heart of a small boy. I keep it in a jar on my desk. ~ Robert Bloch
Dark Humor quotes by Robert Bloch
In the beginning there was Logos ... and God of course. And it was all extremely boring for Logos because he could never beat God at any game ... ~ Yannis Karatsioris
Dark Humor quotes by Yannis Karatsioris
Because it's a lit fuse, love – you light it yourself, and you stand around the powder keg afterward, grinning from ear to ear. ~ Daniel Polansky
Dark Humor quotes by Daniel Polansky
I have not looked at Carlos since the meeting ... Being around him is like walking around with the flu ... The need to lie down in a darkened room and let my hatred of him run through me is almost insurmountable. ~ Kathleen Maher
Dark Humor quotes by Kathleen Maher
Behind all the dark humor, Bill was talking about the same things I'd read in Joseph Campbell. If you look at things, really look, if you lift the veil, you start to recognize that light is love, is infinite, is unconditional. Bill was saying that once you understand the nature of nature, you can let go of difficulties and sign on for the ride - knowing that it's just a ride. And ~ Maynard James Keenan
Dark Humor quotes by Maynard James Keenan
Jaz is their drummer. He's pretty damn good too. Hell, he's pretty damn good at everything he's ever tried. Creative little shit. ~ Lissa Matthews
Dark Humor quotes by Lissa Matthews
Word from the outside, whether it arrived in a mail sack or a news report, seldom overshadowed the facts of our lives. We talked in facts -- work and weather, the logistics of this fence, that field -- but stories were how we spoke. A good story rose to the surface of a conversation like heavy cream, a thing to be savored and served artfully. Stored in dry wit, wrapped in dark humor, tied together with strings of anecdote, these stories told the chronology of a family, the history of a piece of land, the hardships of a certain year or a span of years, a series of events that led without pause to the present. If the stories were recent, they filtered through the door to my room late at night, voices hushed around the kitchen table as they sorted out this day and held it against others, their laughter sharp and sad and slow to come. Time was the key. Remember the time...and something in the air caught like a whisper. Back when. Back before a summer too fresh and real to talk about, a year's work stripped in a twenty-minute hailstorm; a man's right hand mangled in the belts of a combine, first day of harvest; an only son buried alive in a grain bin, suffocated in a red avalanche of wheat. ~ Judy Blunt
Dark Humor quotes by Judy Blunt
How can we cash out-of-town checks when don't know whether a town's still there? ~ Pat Frank
Dark Humor quotes by Pat Frank
Ariadne made an impression on you, and that's great. But life is not literature. Sooner or later, the spell wears off, the romantic feelings disappear, and you're left watching somebody's body disintegrate. You start with a love story, you end up manacled to an hourglass, watching the sands run out. ~ Paul Murray
Dark Humor quotes by Paul Murray
There was nothing worse, Veppers thought, than a loser who'd made it. It was just part of the way things worked – part of the complexity of life, he supposed – that sometimes somebody who absolutely deserved nothing more than to be one of the down-trodden, the oppressed, the dregs of society, lucked out into a position of wealth, power and admiration.
At least people who were natural winners knew how to carry themselves in their pomp, whether their ascendancy had come through the luck of being born rich and powerful or the luck of being born ambitious and capable. Losers who'd made it always let the side down. Veppers was all for arrogance – he possessed the quality in full measure himself, as he'd often been informed – but it had to be deserved, you had to have worked for it. Or at the very least, an ancestor had to have worked for it.
Arrogance without cause, arrogance without achievement – or that mistook sheer luck for true achievement – was an abomination. Losers made everybody look bad. Worse, they made the whole thing – the great game that was life – appear arbitrary, almost meaningless. Their only use, Veppers had long since decided, was as examples to be held up to those who complained about their lack of status or money or control over their lives: look, if this idiot can achieve something, so can anybody, so can you. So stop whining about being exploited and work harder.
Still, at least individual losers were quite obviously statistical freaks. Yo ~ Iain Banks
Dark Humor quotes by Iain Banks
The only thing which really seemed to pay off in life, if you went by Mary Pedersen's example, was sleeping with your superiors. ~ Jonas Eriksson
Dark Humor quotes by Jonas Eriksson
Whenever I read the term 'belief system', somewhere between my eyes and my brain, it becomes 'coping mechanism. ~ Stewart Stafford
Dark Humor quotes by Stewart Stafford
SPOILER ALERT: We all die in the end. ~ Stewart Stafford
Dark Humor quotes by Stewart Stafford
It seems amazing that the Navy SEALs managed to get inside the compound and shoot Osama so efficiently. I can only imagine they were told that the mission was to rescue a bearded British hostage and he must be brought out alive. ~ Frankie Boyle
Dark Humor quotes by Frankie Boyle
I had aimed at Mars and was about to hit Venus; unquestionably the all-time cosmic record for poor shots. ~ Edgar Rice Burroughs
Dark Humor quotes by Edgar Rice Burroughs
Well, fame is a drug and when you take it away from an addict, things can get ugly. ~ Melissa Jo Peltier
Dark Humor quotes by Melissa Jo Peltier
I could croak with no warning, and the only tragedy anyone would experience would be showing up on the last day of my estate sale simply to discover that all remaining items had copious amounts of dog hair on them. ~ Laurie Notaro
Dark Humor quotes by Laurie Notaro
He is a policeman. It is his job to bully people. ~ M. R. C. Kasasian
Dark Humor quotes by M. R. C. Kasasian
I had battled my own demons that day, facing down the thing that imprisoned me since the accident-a scar and the diffidence it created inside of me. But it was just a physical blemish, not something that made me who I am. It took a mentally disturbed murderer who gave me a sneak peak at death to show me that. ~ Pamela Crane
Dark Humor quotes by Pamela Crane
i wasted all of my
outrage on my fucking religion.
it should have been wasted on god-
cut out the middle man. ~ J.A. Carter-Winward
Dark Humor quotes by J.A. Carter-Winward
Shut up," I snapped. "This is not the time. What part of this situation seems like a joke to you?"
Lohka pulled up his knees, giving a feeble, half-manic little laugh. "Oh, maybe just the idea that some soul-devouring being of chaos could be waiting anywhere to finish destroying my life," he said. "That's kind of hilarious, you know. Have you ever had a soul-devouring being of chaos hunting you down so it could finish eating you?"
"No," I said. "I'm sorry, Lohka."
"That's nice," he muttered.
"What about the part where this soul-devouring being of chaos seems to have a taste for me at the moment?" Zhabyr asked. "Can we worry about that, now? Because I kind of already am. ~ J. Leigh Bralick
Dark Humor quotes by J. Leigh Bralick
I love dark humor that crosses the line and makes you say, 'That's so wrong!' And that's 'Family Guy' to me. ~ Elena Satine
Dark Humor quotes by Elena Satine
When you get to Hell look for me; I'll be sitting in the hot-tub waiting."
Cate Harlow
FOR I HAVE SINNED
by Kristen Houghton
A Cate Harlow Private Investigation
due out in August, 2014 ~ Kristen Houghton
Dark Humor quotes by Kristen Houghton
Nonie chewed on her bottom lip for a moment. She'd told Fezzo so much already yet there wasn't a speck of incredulity in his eyes. His expression was serious, and she had his full attention. "I'm not quite sure about what to do with Helen, the ghost that followed me home. ~ Deborah Leblanc
Dark Humor quotes by Deborah Leblanc
He comes.
And he comes
loaded
with noise pollution.
If I ever prayed for anything,
it was for a man
to shut up. ~ Casey Renee Kiser
Dark Humor quotes by Casey Renee Kiser
How do I know you'll keep your word?" asked Coraline.
"I swear it," said the other mother. "I swear it on my own mother's grave."
"Does she have a grave?" asked Coraline.
"Oh yes," said the other mother. "I put her in there myself. And when I found her trying to crawl out, I put her back. ~ Neil Gaiman
Dark Humor quotes by Neil Gaiman
But you know, mon petite, what you got is a gift. And when de good Lord gives you a gift you have to use it. Dat's why he put you here on dis earth. Sometime it's gonna be to help a soul cross over to de other side to meet him. If dat's whey you gott do, den dat's what you gotta do. You can't just keep collecting de dead. You gonna have to find a way to take what you got and work wit dat. ~ Deborah Leblanc
Dark Humor quotes by Deborah Leblanc
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