Burglars Quotes

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Quotes About Burglars

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There's gonna be a lot of slow singing and flower bringing
If my burglar alarm starts ringing ~ The Notorious B.I.G.
Burglars quotes by The Notorious B.I.G.
Vigilantly guard your mind against erroneous and destructive thought as you would guard your house against burglars and assassins. ~ Grenville Kleiser
Burglars quotes by Grenville Kleiser
As a cop trying to anticipate how burglars might use the city, you have to think three-dimensionally. Volumetrically. You have to think in a fundamentally different spatial way about the city laid out below, including how neighborhoods are actually connected and what the most efficient routes might be between them. After all, this is how criminals think, Burdette explained, and this is how they pioneer new geographic ways to escape from you. ~ Geoff Manaugh
Burglars quotes by Geoff Manaugh
Philosophers, for the most part, are constitutionally timid, and dislike the unexpected. Few of them would be genuinely happy as pirates or burglars. Accordingly they invent systems which make the future calculable, at least in its main outlines. ~ Bertrand Russell
Burglars quotes by Bertrand Russell
I support people having a gun in public full stop, not just in your home. We don't have the right to bear arms because of burglars. We have the right to bear arms to resist the supreme power of a corrupt and abusive government. It's not about duck hunting, it's about the ability of the individual. It's the same reason we have freedom of speech, ~ Vince Vaughn
Burglars quotes by Vince Vaughn
A great measure of a man is how he reacts to a midnight awakening when there's no fire or burglar in sight. ~ Kate Jacobs
Burglars quotes by Kate Jacobs
People usually focus on what burglars take, but it's how they move that's so consistently interesting. Burglars explore. They might not live in a city full of secret passages and trapdoors - but they make it look as if they do. They have their own tools and floor plans, their own ways to get from A to B. They'll curl up inside refrigerators, climb through ceilings, use garbage chutes and fall twenty-one floors straight into the emergency room when they could simply have taken the stairs. They'll slip through porch screens and stow themselves inside clothes dryers till the police come busting in to find them. ~ Geoff Manaugh
Burglars quotes by Geoff Manaugh
Ponies take some catching, I believe, after a long start. And so do burglars, ~ J.R.R. Tolkien
Burglars quotes by J.R.R. Tolkien
When you hear in the tape recordings Nixon's own voice saying, We have to stonewall, We have to lie to the Grand Jury, We have to pay burglars a million dollars, it's all too clear the horror of what went on. ~ Bob Woodward
Burglars quotes by Bob Woodward
I grew up on a suburban street with lace curtains and dull neighbours, so I made up stories to tell my friend, in which they became serial killers and burglars. She told her mother, who then told mine. ~ Nina Bawden
Burglars quotes by Nina Bawden
You have found that you were more secure before you accumulated so much. See what greed has imposed on you: You have filled your house and now you fear burglars. You have hoarded money and lost sleep. See what greed has commanded you: "Do this!" And you did it. ~ Saint Augustine
Burglars quotes by Saint Augustine
Kill the fears before they endorse your failures. When you attempt to stop the terrorist at the time he's at work, you are too late! ~ Israelmore Ayivor
Burglars quotes by Israelmore Ayivor
Since the white cops ventured over only when they needed a Negro to conveniently arrest for some crime, the residents had no protection from pickpockets and thieves and burglars, scofflaws and roughnecks, moonshiners and drunks and rapists. ~ Thomas Mullen
Burglars quotes by Thomas Mullen
Misers get up early in the morning; and burglars, I am informed, get up the night before. ~ G.K. Chesterton
Burglars quotes by G.K. Chesterton
Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer were a very notorious couple of cats.
As knockabout clowns, quick-change comedians,
Tight-rope walkers and acrobats
They had an extensive reputation.
[...]
When the family assembled for Sunday dinner,
With their minds made up that they wouldn't get thinner
On Argentine joint, potatoes and greens,
And the cook would appear from behind the scenes
And say in a voice that was broken with sorrow
"I'm afraid you must wait and have dinner tomorrow!
For the joint has gone from the oven like that!"
Then the family would say: "It's that horrible cat!
It was Mungojerrie – or Rumpleteazer!" -
And most of the time they left it at that.

Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer had a wonderful way of working together.
And some of the time you would say it was luck
And some of the time you would say it was weather.
They would go through the house like a hurricane,
And no sober person could take his oath
Was it Mungojerrie – or Rumpleteazer?
Or could you have sworn that it mightn't be both?

And when you heard a dining room smash
Or up from the pantry there came a loud crash
Or down from the library came a loud ping
From a vase which was commonly said to be Ming
Then the family would say: "Now which was which cat?
It was Mungojerrie! And Rumpleteazer!"
And there's nothing at all to be done about that! ~ T.S. Eliot
Burglars quotes by T.S. Eliot
But I couldn't think it more hateful of them to have taken my fur tippet. Burglars never seem to realize one might feel the cold. How would they like it if I took away their wife's shawl? ~ Nancy Mitford
Burglars quotes by Nancy Mitford
We're cat burglars baby. You gotta use your cat vision." Syn laughed quietly again. Furi ~ A.E. Via
Burglars quotes by A.E. Via
If the many allegations made to this date are true, then the burglars who broke into the headquarters of the Democratic National Committee at the Watergate were, in effect, breaking into the home of every citizen. ~ Sam Ervin
Burglars quotes by Sam Ervin
In another sense, however, burglars are idiots, incapable of using a door when cutting through drywall for twenty minutes will do the trick. But then they'll get stuck in the insulation, or they'll trip and plummet through the roof into the wrong grocery store, or they'll accidentally set fire to the very place they've been trying so hard to enter (it's happened). ~ Geoff Manaugh
Burglars quotes by Geoff Manaugh
...human beings have a distorted view of risk. They don't see the whole picture. Our perceptions are twisted by stories in the media, by films, by our own personalities and experiences. So, despite the unlikely odds, we still worry about being raped or murdered. We hear a sound in the night and think of burglars, not mice... It's kind of a protective pessimism: if we worry about the worst happening, it may miss our door. ~ Ruth Dugdall
Burglars quotes by Ruth Dugdall
Morality is a burglar's tool whose merit lies in never being left behind at the scene of the crime. ~ Karl Kraus
Burglars quotes by Karl Kraus
Whatever, crazy chick who maybe lives here and maybe also breaks into Michael's house when they're all gone. I'm out. Have a nice delusion. -Shayne ~ Rachel Caine
Burglars quotes by Rachel Caine
He drives a Saab. He's the kind of man who points at people he doesn't like the look of, as if they were burglars and his forefinger a policeman's flashlight. He stands at the counter of a shop where owners of Japanese cars come to purchase white cables. Ove eyes the sales assistant for a long time before shaking a medium-sized white box at him. ~ Fredrik Backman
Burglars quotes by Fredrik Backman
The very worst strategy is to try to hide a gun. Children are remarkably adept at finding things that Mom and Dad don't want them to find, and burglars make their living by doing so. No matter how well hidden you think it is, a gun that's not secured is an accident or crime waiting to happen. If they're not on you, lock 'em up. ~ Grant Cunningham
Burglars quotes by Grant Cunningham
Don't throw a baby at anything - even a burglar. ~ Eugene Mirman
Burglars quotes by Eugene Mirman
He thought he would light the fire when he got inside, and make himself some breakfast, just to pass away the time; but he did not seem able to handle anything from a scuttleful of coals to a teaspoon without dropping it or falling over it, and making such a noise that he was in mortal fear that it would wake Mrs. G. up, and that she would think it was burglars and open the window and call "Police!" and then these two detectives would rush in and handcuff him, and march him off to the police-court. He was in a morbidly nervous state by this time, and he pictured the trial, and his trying to explain the circumstances to the jury, and nobody believing him, and his being sentenced to twenty years' penal servitude, and his mother dying of a broken heart. So he gave up trying to get breakfast, and wrapped himself up in his overcoat and sat in the easy-chair till Mrs. G came down at half-past seven. ~ Jerome K. Jerome
Burglars quotes by Jerome K. Jerome
Suppose ... burglars had made entry into this ... [library]. Picture them seated here on this floor, pouring the light of their dark-lanterns over some books they found, and thus absorbing moral truths and getting moral uplift. The whole course of their lives would have been changed. As it was, they kept straight on in their immoral way and were sent to jail. For all I know, they may next be sent to Congress. ~ Mark Twain
Burglars quotes by Mark Twain
When we get to the door I reach for the doorbell but Carlos steps in front of me, grins and then starts banging on the front door with all of his might. The door shakes and his pounding thunders throughout the house. (...) We must be the world's loudest burglars.
I shout, "Why are you pounding so hard?"
His grin gets even larger. "If anyone's home, they'll definitely answer that knock. If nobody's home what difference does it make? ~ Greg Logsted
Burglars quotes by Greg Logsted
God is a sort of burglar. As a young man you knock him down; as an old man you try to conciliate him, because he may knock you down. ~ Herbert Beerbohm Tree
Burglars quotes by Herbert Beerbohm Tree
Mr. Roddis: [Outraged at the presence of two apparent burglars (actually his in-laws) having tea in his suburban home] - And they've opened a pot of my raspberry jam."
Uncle Fred: [Architect of the above missunderstanding] Ah, then you will be able to catch them red-handed. I should fetch a policman. ~ P.G. Wodehouse
Burglars quotes by P.G. Wodehouse
Congratulations! We're reverse burglars, here to give you fifty gold solari! ~ Scott Lynch
Burglars quotes by Scott Lynch
[it is] a high class kind of subversion, very high class. We're not second story burglars. We go right in the front door. ~ Mike Gorman
Burglars quotes by Mike Gorman
Burglars are getting very clever these days. Last night, my wife woke me up, "Darling! Darling! There's a burglar downstairs!!" So I go down, check every room and don't find anyone. Then I realized I don't have a wife and when I went back upstairs my bed and TV were gone. ~ Steve Evans
Burglars quotes by Steve Evans
We caught seventy-five frogs that night! We left our ice chest in the truck, so I was putting frogs in my socks and the pockets of my pants and shirt.
When we couldn't carry any more frogs, we made our way back to my truck. As soon as we arrived, police cars came from every direction. A homeowner in the neighborhood must have seen my truck and feared we were burglars. As the police questioned us, they must have thought Mike was drunk, because he couldn't stop laughing. They kept asking me what we'd been drinking and smoking and where it was. When a policeman shined a light on my shirt, I figured out what Mike was giggling about. I forgot I'd stuffed a frog into the front pocket of my shirt and buttoned it. Its legs were sticking out of my pocket and it looked like it was wearing a diaper! The police let us go but warned us to never sneak back onto the golf course because it was trespassing. We probably went back three or four times by a different route and never were caught. ~ Jase Robertson
Burglars quotes by Jase Robertson
Grow up and you turn into burglars and get shot, or worse, they make you wear a coat and tie and stash you in the First National Bank behind brass bars! We gotta stand still! Stay the age we are. Grow up? Hah! All you do then is marry someone who screams at you! ~ Ray Bradbury
Burglars quotes by Ray Bradbury
Looking for an honest politician is like looking for an ethical burglar. ~ H.L. Mencken
Burglars quotes by H.L. Mencken
If you ask any ordinary reader which of Dickens's proletarian characters he can remember, the three he is almost certain to mention are Bill Sykes, Sam Weller and Mrs. Gamp. A burglar, a valet and a drunken midwife-not exactly a representative cross-section of the English working class. ~ George Orwell
Burglars quotes by George Orwell
Waterside was poor. Hillside was rich. Waterside stank. Hillside was clean. Waterside had thieves. Hillside had bankers -I'm sorry, burglars. ~ Patrick Rothfuss
Burglars quotes by Patrick Rothfuss
We had gay burglars the other night. They broke in and rearranged the furniture. ~ Robin Williams
Burglars quotes by Robin Williams
Thoughts ramble through my head like nervous burglars in a pitch-black house. ~ Orhan Pamuk
Burglars quotes by Orhan Pamuk
burglars are idiot masters of the built environment, drunk Jedis of architectural space. ~ Geoff Manaugh
Burglars quotes by Geoff Manaugh
Ove is fifty-nine. He drives a Saab. He's the kind of man who points at people he doesn't like the look of, as if they were burglars and his forefinger a policeman's flashlight. ~ Fredrik Backman
Burglars quotes by Fredrik Backman
We don't have the right to bear arms because of burglars; we have the right to bear arms to resist the supreme power of a corrupt and abusive government. ~ Vince Vaughn
Burglars quotes by Vince Vaughn
But he's nice," Barby objected.

Tom Bishop smiled without humor. "Most pleasant and interesting man I ever knew was a burglar. ~ John Blaine
Burglars quotes by John Blaine
Never Forget, even for an instant, that the one and only reason anybody has for taking your gun away is to make you weaker than he is, so he can do something to you that you wouldn't allow him to do if you were equipped to prevent it. This goes for burglars, muggers, and rapists, and even more so for policemen, bureaucrats, and politicians. ~ L. Neil Smith
Burglars quotes by L. Neil Smith
But she was already in. Gareth couldn't help but stand back in admiration. Hyacinth Bridgerton was clearly a natural born athlete.
Either that or a cat burglar. ~ Julia Quinn
Burglars quotes by Julia Quinn
By contrast, my wife at fifty-two yeas old seems to me just as attractive as the day I first met her. If I were to say this out loud, she would say, 'Douglas, that's just a line. No one prefers wrinkles, no one prefers grey.' To which I'd reply, 'But none of this is a surprise. I've been expecting to watch you grow older ever since we met. Why should it trouble me? It's the face itself that I love, not that face at twenty-eight or thirty-four or fourty-three. It's that face.'
Perhaps she would have liked to hear this but I had never got around to saying it out loud. I had always presumed there would be time and now, sitting on the edge of the bed at four a.m., no longer listening out for burglars, it seemed that it might be too late. ~ David Nicholls
Burglars quotes by David Nicholls
Leaving out the gamblers, the burglars, and the plumbers, perhaps we do put our trust in God after a fashion. But, after all, it is an overstatement.
If the cholera or black plague should come to these shores, perhaps the bulk of the nation would pray to be delivered from it, but the rest would put their trust in The Health Board ... ~ Mark Twain
Burglars quotes by Mark Twain
Interesting how some words that hold basically the same meaning can have different connotations. Take 'outlaw' and 'criminal' for instance.
'Outlaw' has an almost romantic, nostalgic meaning – you tend to think of Jesse James or Robin Hood when you think of outlaws. Billy the Kid has been described as both a 'notorious outlaw' and a 'beloved folk hero.'
'Criminal' however has a completely different connotation. We think of muggers, burglars, armed robbers etc.
Nobody really wants to have a 'criminal' in their family tree, but the idea of having 'outlaw blood' is exciting and glamorous ~ Karl Wiggins
Burglars quotes by Karl Wiggins
Actors and burglars work better at night. ~ Cedric Hardwicke
Burglars quotes by Cedric Hardwicke
They were a wonderful set of burglars, the people who were running San Francisco when I first came to town in 1923, wonderful because, if they were stealing, they were doing it with class and style. ~ Sally Stanford
Burglars quotes by Sally Stanford
In one sense, burglars seem to understand architecture better than the rest of us. They misuse it, pass through it, and ignore any limitations a building tries to impose. Burglars don't need doors; they'll punch holes through walls or slice down through ceilings instead. Burglars unpeel a building from the inside out to hide inside the drywall (or underneath the floorboards, or up in the trusses of an unlit crawl space). They are masters of architectural origami, demonstrating skills the rest of us only wish we had, dark wizards of cities and buildings, unlimited by laws that hold the rest of us in. ~ Geoff Manaugh
Burglars quotes by Geoff Manaugh
It was, from the burglar's perspective, easy money. At this rate, from one shop alone, he could pull in $60,000 a year. If the only thing standing between him and the middle class was a few pieces of Sheetrock, why not? What's the point of work when you can just pop through a wall at 3:00 a.m. to collect your pay? ~ Geoff Manaugh
Burglars quotes by Geoff Manaugh
The worst part of it is you don't know if he's barking at an owl, the moon or a burglar!"
"That's one of the drawbacks of a limited vocabulary! ~ Charles M. Schulz
Burglars quotes by Charles M. Schulz
Registering guns is like sending a list of your household valuables to a burglars' guild. Why invite - guarantee - a visit.? ~ Kenneth W. Royce
Burglars quotes by Kenneth W. Royce
You're like rottweilers - they protect you from burglars, but nothing protects you from them. ~ Dia Reeves
Burglars quotes by Dia Reeves
Now that I thought of it, perhaps whacking the burglar wasn't quite ... necessary.
It occurred to me that he said "Hi." I thought he did, anyway. He said hi. Do burglars usually
greet their victims? Hi. I'd like to rob your house. Does that work for you? ~ Kristan Higgins
Burglars quotes by Kristan Higgins
Moments never stay, whether or not you ask them, they do not care, no moment cares, and the ones you wish could stretch out like a hammock for you to lie in, well, those moments leave the quickest and take everything good with them, little burglars, those moments, those hours, those days you loved the most. ~ Catherine Lacey
Burglars quotes by Catherine Lacey
It is the first time the burglar has been appointed as caretaker. ~ Gough Whitlam
Burglars quotes by Gough Whitlam
We say that the most dangerous
criminal now is the entirely lawless modern philosopher. Compared
to him, burglars and bigamists are essentially moral men; my heart
goes out to them. They accept the essential ideal of man; they
merely seek it wrongly. Thieves respect property. They merely wish
the property to become their property that they may more perfectly
respect it. But philosophers dislike property as property; they
wish to destroy the very idea of personal possession. Bigamists
respect marriage, or they would not go through the highly
ceremonial and even ritualistic formality of bigamy. But
philosophers despise marriage as marriage. Murderers respect human
life; they merely wish to attain a greater fulness of human life in
themselves by the sacrifice of what seems to them to be lesser
lives. But philosophers hate life itself, their own as much as
other people's. ~ G.K. Chesterton
Burglars quotes by G.K. Chesterton
It is Never Too Late to Mend."

Since it can never be too late
To change your life, or else renew it,
Let the unpleasant process wait
Until you are compelled to do it.
The State provides (and gratis too)
Establishments for such as you.

Remember this, and pluck up heart,
That, be you publican or parson,
Your ev'ry art must have a start,
From petty larceny to arson;
And even in the burglar's trade,
The cracksman is not born, but made.

So, if in your career of crime,
You fail to carry out some "coup",
Then try again a second time,
And yet again, until you do;
And don't despair, or fear the worst,
Because you get found out at first.

Perhaps the battle will not go,
On all occasions, to the strongest;
You may be fairly certain tho'
That He Laughs Last who laughs the Longest.
So keep a good reserve of laughter,
Which may be found of use hereafter.

Believe me that, howe'er well meant,
A Good Resolve is always brief;
Don't let your precious hours be spent
In turning over a new leaf.
Such leaves, like Nature's, soon decay,
And then are only in the way.

The Road to - -well, a certain spot,
(A Road of very fair dimensions),
Has, so the proverb tells us, got
A parquet-floor of Good Intentions.
Take care, in your desire to please,
You do not add a brick to these.

Harry Graham
Burglars quotes by Harry Graham
I was afraid of burglars and Indian thugs and snakes and fires and Jack the Ripper, when I should have been afraid of thirty years in a bank and a take-over bid and a premature retirement and the Deuil du Roy Albert. ~ Graham Greene
Burglars quotes by Graham Greene
There have been only five burglars in the history of robbery who have specialized in rope. All five of these burglars were caught and sent to prison, which is why scarcely any people lock up their rope for safekeeping. ~ Lemony Snicket
Burglars quotes by Lemony Snicket
Claiming that the destructive practice of mountaintop removal mining, blowing the tops off mountains to get at the coal beneath, performs the "necessary" function of creating flat land for development To tear treasure out of the bowels of the land was their desire, with no more moral purpose at the back of it than there is in burglars breaking into a safe. ~ Joseph Conrad
Burglars quotes by Joseph Conrad
Mexican homes as a rule are closed off to the world by high blank walls of yellowish masonry, topped with broken glass to discourage escaladores, or climbing burglars. The gardens and fountains and other delights are hidden, as in an Arab city. ~ Charles Portis
Burglars quotes by Charles Portis
Congress should definitely consider decriminalizing possession of marijuana ... We should concentrate on prosecuting the rapists and burglars who are a menace to society. ~ Dan Quayle
Burglars quotes by Dan Quayle
Astronomers, like burglars and jazz musicians, operate best at night. ~ Miles Kington
Burglars quotes by Miles Kington
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