Beer Quote Quotes

Every unpleasant worldly experience in life exposes our sensitive nervous systems to painful phenomena. Despite all the beer commercial advertisement slogans urging us to live with gusto, life is unavoidably painful. Life is a battering ram that inflicts trauma upon human beings. People blunt the traumatic force of enduring a lifetime of pain, fearfulness, and unremitted anguish and boredom with religion, sex, booze, drugs, fantasy, and other indulgent acts and forms acts of escapism. ~ Kilroy J. Oldster

Don't quote me on this, but if they ever manage to ban beer advertising in baseball you can kiss the national pastime goodbye. ~ Roger Maris

You know the law, Dresden."
"He who kills the cheer springs for beer," chanted the rest of the table. ~ Jim Butcher

Now, I know what you're thinking: Isn't this the guy who said, "Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy"? Well, not exactly. This quote has been somewhat paraphrased and hijacked by many of our nation's craft breweries, and rightly so. It may be revisionist writing, but I for one am okay with it. What Franklin did write was, "Behold the rain which descends from heaven upon our vineyards, there it enters the roots of the vines, to be changed into wine, a constant proof that God loves us, and loves to see us happy." Beer, wine . . . come on. Six of one, etcetera. He also coined the euphemism for drunkenness "Halfway to Concord," which tickles me to no end. That, my friends, is fun with words. ~ Nick Offerman

We were the untamed young bucks, testosterone and beer fueling our charge, fear alone left in the wake. Everybody thought we were a little dangerous, and that was cool. ~ A.D. Aliwat

Saturday morning. Hung-over as fuck. The beer fear squirms through my belly with alien tendrils and I know with absolute certainty that I have done something unforgivable.

Something apocalyptic.

Again. ~ Michael Taljaard

If you can make it down to the pub, the pub will make it up to you. ~ Benny Bellamacina

What can I say? Love is blind," said Rory, sitting down next to Yamane. "Yamane here is the acknowledged world master of queer fu."
"Oh, no, you did not just say that." Yamane shot him a sour look and drank the last of Rory's beer. ~ Z.A. Maxfield

Beer's intellectual. What a shame so many idiots drink it. ~ Ray Bradbury

A woman is like beer. They look good, they smell good, and you'd step over your own mother just to get one! ~ Homer

Paintings are like a beer, only beer tastes good and it's hard to stop drinking beer. ~ Billy Carter

Homer no function beer well without. ~ Homer

I would not have thought of eating a meal without drinking a beer. ~ Ernest Hemingway,

To put it mildly, Beer Geeks are particular about the beer they drink. They don't waste time, money, and liver capacity on bad beer, and they put a formidable amount of thought into the beer they consume. But consume they do, and impressively well. ~ Patrick Dawson

Beer is a wholesome liquor ... it abounds with nourishment ~ Benjamin Rush

This beer is good for you. This is draft beer. Stick with the beer. Let's go and beat this guy up and come back and drink some more beer. ~ Ernest Hemingway,

A beer doesn't have to be difficult to acquire, but damned if that doesn't make everything taste better. ~ Patrick Dawson

They chose "beer as soda pop." Craft brewers are "beer as wine. ~ Michael Jackson

Gentlemen, consider: of course the ancient Egyptians made beer cans; where else would they have kept their beer? ~ Neil Gaiman

He that drinks beer, thinks beer. ~ Washington Irving

Life is like a beer. When the bubbles blew over, that was when the beer started. The beer is only half as good without the foam. ~ Vann Chow

Beer, of course, is actually a depressant, but poor people will never stop hoping otherwise. ~ Kurt Vonnegut

Keep your libraries, your penal institutions, your insaneasylums ... give me beer.You think man needs rule, he needs beer. The world does not need morals, it needs beer ... The souls of men have been fed with indigestibles, but the soul could make use of beer. ~ Henry Miller

The reality is that beer still outsells wine and spirits combined, and makes up 60 of all alcoholic beverage occasions. It's important to keep beer fun, relevant and in step with the changing preferences of adults who enjoy beer. ~ Pat McGauley

When I heated my home with oil, I used an average of 800 gallons a year. I have found that I can keep comfortably warm for an entire winter with slightly over half that quantity of beer. ~ Dave Barry

Beer ... a high and mighty liquor. ~ Julius Caesar

Beer. It always seems like such a good idea at the time, doesn't it? What's worse is beer seems like an even better idea after you've had some beer. ~ Steven Hall

I think this would be a good time for a beer. ~ Franklin D. Roosevelt

They who drink beer will think beer. ~ Washington Irving

Usually, I'm on the bus by now, having a beer and waiting for everyone else. This is cutting into my beer time. ~ Craig Berube

There is nothing wrong with sobriety in moderation. ~ John Ciardi

I never was a crazy liquor drinker, and I don't like beer that much - though I keep the brews at home because my homies love beer. ~ Danny Brown

If I saved all the money I spent on beer, I'd spend it on beer. ~ Granger Smith

You were born to win. ~ Troy Clark

If circumstances dictate that your disposable income has to come from eating ramen alongside your vintage Cantillon gueuze, so be it. ~ Patrick Dawson

Failure starts a future success, if you become better. ~ Troy Clark

Boughs have their fruit and blossom
At all times of the year;
Rivers are running over
With red beer and brown beer. ~ William Butler Yeats

Drinking really cold beer is like slapping yourself in the face with an ice pick. ~ Michael Jackson

Beer makes you feel the way you ought to feel without beer. ~ Henry Lawson

Our fans would never waste good beer by pouring it on us, ~ Jeff Gordon

Leinenkugels makes better beer now that Miller bought them. It will license insecure people to like craft beers. ~ Michael Jackson

There is no strong beer, just weak men ~ Dan Castellaneta

Pride is a great energizer for me. --Titus Ray, Chapter 1. ~ Luana Ehrlich

Every big dream begins with a little nap. ~ Yohann Dafeu

My goal is to hit the gym every day I'm on vacation. Usually I just end up sleeping and drinking beer. ~ Gary Allan

During the first millennium BCE, even the beer-loving Mesopotamians turned their backs on beer, which was dethroned as the most cultured and civilized of drinks, and the age of wine began. ~ Tom Standage

Beer has terroir not for the soil in which the hops or grain are grown, but for the people in the area for whom the beer is brewed, who shape by their cultural expectations how that beer will be. ~ Tim Beaumont

But no matter how good the beer, how many honors or awards, how innovative Goose Island would ever be again, someone deep in the crowd would always boo. ~ Josh Noel

Beer is sacred business, a mood-altering food substance that may have preserved the human species. To drink beer is to be human. ~ Alan D. Eames

Cold beer is bottled God. ~ Dylan Thomas

You can't be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline - it helps if you have some kind of football team, or some nuclear weapons, but in the very least you need a beer. ~ Frank Zappa

It couldn't be the beer. Donnie McRory was certain of that. If you sent American beer out to be analyzed, the lab would probably phone up and say, 'Your horse has diabetes. ~ Sharyn McCrumb

You sit back in the darkness, nursing your beer, breathing in that ineffable aroma of the old-time saloon: dark wood, spilled beer, good cigars, and ancient whiskey - the sacred incense of the drinking man. ~ Bruce Aidells

All you need is a pool table, beer, an electric jukebox and good conversation. The day a girl beats me in a game of Beirut [a kind of beer pong] is a good sign! ~ Chace Crawford

If you want success, then be your own success story. ~ Steven Cuoco

Beer makes all jokes funny. Beer makes ugly and fat women attractive, which is something ugly women can't do for themselves, because they're too busy getting fat. Beer is also refreshing and a good listener. ~ Dick Masterson

Man is a greater thing than you have thought him, ~ Edith Hahn Beer

When you serve a beer-cock an ear. ~ John Shirley

The city people call us shit farmers," Otto sneered, "but now ~ Edith Hahn Beer

He changed more times than a baby in a beer-drinking contest. ~ Scott Adams

I want a beer. I want a giant, ice-cold bottle of beer and shower sex. ~ Nora Roberts

John Milton almost single-handedly created the identity of the writer as political activist. ~ Anna Beer

We're just going to go straight beer. No sense in diluting it. ~ Robert Gibbs

Do you remember your first sip of beer? Terrible! How could anyone like that stuff? But beer, you reflect, is an acquired taste; one gradually trains oneself - or just comes - to enjoy that flavor. What flavor? The flavor of that first sip? No one could like that flavor! Beer tastes different to the experienced beer drinker. Then beer isn't an acquired tast; one doesn't learn to like that first taste; one gradually comes to experience a different, and likable, taste. Had the first sip tasted that way, you would have liked beer wholeheartedly from the beginning! ~ Douglas Hofstadter

Breathed the air of freedom. My disguise became history. ~ Edith Hahn Beer

I'd give my goddamned soul for just a glass of beer. ~ Jack Nicholson

Children by the Nazi forces, for slave labor ~ Edith Hahn Beer

Beer is proof that God loves us. ~ Benjamin Franklin

When an idea is idiotic to begin with, its applications never make any sense. ~ Edith Hahn Beer

My dad's all I've ever had. When I was 3 and 4, my mom used to take me to bars. I understand why now - babysitters cost beer, beer and-a-half an hour. ~ Christopher Titus

Where does one not find that bland degeneration which beer produces in the spirit! ~ Friedrich Nietzsche

Well that's the nicest thing a beer induced hallucination has ever said to me. ~ Rocko

See, vodka, that's drinking. Beer - well, beer is just getting the inside of your mouth wet. ~ Tad Williams

Why is American beer served cold? So you can tell it from urine. ~ Dave Moulton

Life is beautiful, and it begins tomorrow. ~ Edith Hahn Beer

I do like beer, but lately I've started drinking non-alcoholic beer and I like the taste of it and I don't get the alcohol, so that's a good alternative also. ~ Mike Ditka

I didn't think I could go onstage and play unless I had a beer to loosen up. Well, if it was only one beer to loosen up, I'd probably still be drinking today. ~ Joe Perry

You can now buy a pack of beer containing 99 cans. A 99-can pack of beer. Who says America has lost its competitive edge? ~ David Letterman

Beer drinkers have been duped by mass marketing into the belief that it makes sense to drink only one brand of beer. In truth, brand loyalty in beer makes no more sense than 'vegetable loyalty' in food. Can you imagine it? No thanks, I'll pass on the mashed potatoes, carrots, bread and roast beef. Me, I'm strictly a broccoli man.' ~ Stephen Beaumont

Alex Robichek had survived their Italian exile; that Uncle Richard and Aunt Roszi were safe in Sacramento. ~ Edith Hahn Beer

How much beer is in German intelligence? ~ Friedrich Nietzsche

Here with my beer I sit, while golden moments flit: alas! They pass unheeded by: and as they fly, I, being dry, sit idly sipping here, my beer. ~ George Arnold

Kant ate but once a day, and drank no beer. Of this liquor, (I mean the strong black beer,) he was, indeed, the most determined enemy. If ever a man died prematurely, Kant would say - 'He has been drinking beer, I presume. ~ Thomas De Quincey

For the second straight year, craft beer is the fastest growing segment of the U.S. alcoholic beverage industry. In 2005, craft beer experienced a 9 percent increase in volume, nearly triple that of the growth experienced in the wine and spirits industry. ~ Sherwood Boehlert

In my opinion, most of the great men of the past were only there for the beer - the wealth, prestige and grandeur that went with the power. ~ A.J.P. Taylor

Listen up, you couch potatoes: each recycled beer can saves enough electricity to run a television for three hours. ~ Denis Hayes

The inclusion of lemon or lime juice in grog, made compulsory in 1795, therefore reduced the incidence of scurvy dramatically. And since beer contains no vitamin C, switching from beer to grog made British crews far healthier overall. ~ Tom Standage

In the summer we graduated we flipped out completely, drinking beer, cruising in our cars and beating up each other. It was a crazy summer. That's when I started to be interested in girls. ~ Ed O'Neill

I don't consider weed to be any worse than having a beer. ~ James Franco

If God had intended us to drink beer, He would have given us stomachs. ~ David Daye

Bud Light ... the perfect beer for marketers about to lose their job. ~ Jeff Barrett

Everybody's old enough for a beer, ain't that right, Mule? ~ Jack Nicholson

See, there's a fat guy doing okay. Bring me another beer. ~ Mickey Lolich

In heaven there is no beer. That's why we drink ours here. ~ Frank Yankovic

If you don't know what else to do, drink beer. ~ Wally Byam

Beer may cause you to digress - and lead a happier life. ~ Michael Jackson

There's a long tradition of teen comedies where the kids are getting drunk on beer and whatever else, so smoking a joint to me is no worse than having a beer. So, if someone has a problem with it, I'll just tell them to relax. ~ James Franco

The egg creams of Avenue A in New York and the root beer float ... are among the high points of American gastronomic inventiveness. ~ Mark Kurlansky

The trouble with jogging is that the ice falls out of your glass. ~ Martin Mull

I will veto every single beer, um, bill with earmarks. ~ John McCain