Babysitting Quotes

I worked at restaurants and coffee shops and babysitting and just whatever I could do to make money. ~ Tig Notaro

So in case you were wondering, I had no idea her friend was you," Gael said. "I wouldn't have tried to rope you into babysitting, I promise."

"I believe you," Sammy said. "Don't worry. We're hardly even friends, really, I just met her yesterday - ooh, look," she squealed, interrupting herself. "There's a baby elephant!"

Gael laughed. "I wouldn't have expected you to go ape-shit for baby animals."

Sammy raised an eyebrow. "Name one person with a soul who doesn't go apeshit for baby animals. They're, like, animals who are tiny. Who are you, the devil?"

Gael shook his head. "I like them, too. Obviously. But your voice went about a million levels higher just then."

Sammy crossed her arms. "Maybe you should question your ability to maintain an even tone of voice in the face of" - she smiled one of those weird upside-down smiles that little kids do when they're excited - "BABY ELEPHANTS. ~ Leah Konen

I spent my summers in Connecticut scooping ice cream and babysitting. ~ Grace Gummer

Gabriel: Bethany lacks understanding about the ways of the world. She still has much to learn and that makes her vulnerable."
Beth: "Do you have to make me sound like a full-time babysitting project?"
Xavier: "I happen to be an experienced babysitter. I can show you my resume if you'd like. ~ Alexandra Adornetto

It wouldn't kill you to flirt a little, so I don't remember this assignment as totally sucking. I'm babysitting a guy who thinks he's a leprechaun, and I'm rescuing a has-been horse. The least you could do I grab my ass once in a while. ~ Janet Evanovich

I'm a lot older than my little brothers and sister, so I think I grew up babysitting them. ~ Josh Hartnett

In the real world, babysitting is a groovy way for young people to learn responsibility (and earn a little pocket money).
In the Terrorverse, it's a plot device used to kill teenagers. ~ Seth Grahame-Smith

Rusty, Dad needs to work and I'm going out, so you're babysitting."
"I like that word," Rusty said, settling down for a nap. "Come, babies. Let us sit together. ~ Sarah Rees Brennan

There are so many places, particularly right now. Go and volunteer at a food bank. If you play the piano, go play the piano in an Alzheimer's home. Or read in an Alzheimer's home. Help a military family with babysitting. The opportunities are endless. People often think 'They want me?' or 'I can be of help?' What we try to say here is 'Be who you are.'Feel that, live it and pass it on. ~ Maria Shriver

I had a slight feeling of babysitting as we walked soberly along together using all our old phrases, making all our old jokes, not quite feeling all our old fondness. ~ Ben Dolnick

In a way, for women, marriage was like an extended babysitting gig. The woman was committing herself to coddling and watching over a grown man for the rest of her life. ~ Bart Hopkins

Nobody leaves this place without singing the blues. ~ Albert Collins

Why were men such complicated beasts anyway? Relationships felt like full-time babysitting jobs crossed with high-level code cracking. ~ Sonali Dev

I still have my same babysitting job, I babysit twice a week. ~ Lana Del Rey

As with many teens, my first jobs included babysitting and mopping floors at McDonald's. Since then, I've held jobs a diverse as selling used cars, selling apparel, cosmetics, and real-estate, substitute-teaching six graders, teaching undergraduate creative writing, and working as an editorial assistant for a literary magazine. ~ Therese Fowler

Are you babysitting?" I pulled out my phone. "Is this a bad time? I can call for a pick-up. I'm sure Kitty McLitterbox would love to come back for me." "If you leave me," she snarled, "I will hunt you down, chop you up and feed you to Grandmother's koi." I believed her. "Are all kitsunes this violent, or are you the exception?" She glanced toward the house. "You've met my mother and grandmother." "Good point. ~ Hailey Edwards

The only nightmare I could remember was from when I was a very small child, maybe three or four years old. Cookie Monster from Sesame Street had been babysitting me and kept chasing me around the house calling me 'Cookie'. I was trying to focus on it, but at sixteen years old, it was funny to me now. ~ Jodi Bullock

Dear Deborah,

Words do not come easily for so many men. We are taught to be strong, to provide, to put away our emotions. A father can work his way through his days and never see that his years are going by. If I could go back in time, I would say some things to that young father as he holds, somewhat uncertainly, his daughter for the very first time. These are the things I would say:

When you hear the first whimper in the night, go to the nursery leaving your wife sleeping. Rock in a chair, walk the floor, sing a lullaby so that she will know a man can be gentle.

When Mother is away for the evening, come home from work, do the babysitting. Learn to cook a hotdog or a pot of spaghetti, so that your daughter will know a man can serve another's needs.

When she performs in school plays or dances in recitals, arrive early, sit in the front seat, devote your full attention. Clap the loudest, so that she will know a man can have eyes only for her.

When she asks for a tree house, don't just build it, but build it with her. Sit high among the branches and talk about clouds, and caterpillars, and leaves. Ask her about her dreams and wait for her answers, so that she will know a man can listen.

When you pass by her door as she dresses for a date, tell her she is beautiful. Take her on a date yourself. Open doors, buy flowers, look her in the eye, so that she will know a man can respect her.

When she moves away ~ Lisa Wingate

She nodded, lower lip trembling for an instant before she got it under control. "I'm such a baby. I was fine as long as I was cleaning up, but as soon as I stopped, I got so angry. Almost as if I was picking up everyone else's anger, too."
He matched her smaller strides as they walked, choosing to focus on the lighter aspect of her comment - they'd discuss the other later. "You might be a baby, but you're mine. And I like babysitting. ~ Nalini Singh

I babysat kids in a ShopRite, which is a grocery store. They had a babysitting center so that parents could bring their children while they shopped. It was awful. I also was not very good at keeping the kids calm. ~ Kate Micucci

Do you have any idea how many times I've read If You Give a Mouse a Cookie to this kid? That is one fucked-up story. How is that a book for babies?"
Jase laughs.
"I thought it was about babysitting."
"Hell no, it's addiction. That friggin' mouse is never satisfied. You give him one thing, he wants something else, and then he asks for more and on and on and on. Fucked up. ~ Huntley Fitzpatrick

My sister was always very motherly, babysitting and stuff. ~ Zooey Deschanel

I hang around kids so people will assume when I act like one it's because I'm babysitting. ~ Richelle E. Goodrich

Those bands, you plan your life around them. You plan vacations around concert dates. You save babysitting money for records. You live for those days when Creem magazine arrives in your dusty mailbox and you frantically flip through it for any information on your favorites. The bands, the musicians that you love, they love you back. And when they quit, when they fall apart, when they die - they ruin that future you thought they'd always be a part of. ~ Karina Halle

In fact, in the last job I had before coming to the White House - I remember this clearly - I was on maternity leave with Sasha, still trying to figure out what to do with my life, and I got a call for an interview for this position, a senior position at the hospitals. And I thought, okay, here we go. So I had to scramble to look for babysitting, and couldn't find one. ~ Michelle Obama

The irony of the babysitting situation is that you need someone to watch your kids while you go out to earn the money to pay someone to take care of your kids. Your ultimate goal by earning the money is to be able to spend quality time with your kids, which is what you are paying your babysitter to do. ~ Jim Gaffigan

And never say that Chudi is "babysitting" - people who babysit are people for whom the baby is not a primary responsibility. ~ Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie

When you're babysitting a kid, all you're seeing is a version of them, a small dosage. ~ J. B. Smoove

My job is not babysitting people; my job is focusing on making the best band I possibly can. ~ Jerry Only

Few people know this, but I am a trained assassin, skilled in jujitsu and krav maga. I can also, with a few folds, turn an ordinary piece of notebook paper into a lethal weapon. Or I can turn it into a butterfly, which is a great trick when I'm babysitting."
I fought a smile. "A trained assassin who babysits."
"Only the Greene twins and only because their family gets every premium channel on the planet. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

Still, despite all this, traveling is the great true love of my life. I have always felt, ever since I was sixteen years old and first went to Russia with my saved-up babysitting money, that to travel is worth any cost or sacrifice. I am loyal and constant in my love for travel, as I have not always been loyal and constant in my other loves. I feel about travel the way a happy new mother feels about her impossible, colicky, restless, newborn baby
I just don't care what it puts me through. Because I adore it. Because it's mine. Because it looks exactly like me. It can barf all over me if it wants to
I just don't care. ~ Elizabeth Gilbert

Look at her," he ordered. "She's foaming at the mouth. That's bad, right? Don't they shoot you when you do that?"
"She's blowing bubbles," Grace explained. "At three months, we say it's cute. We frown on it when a child turns six. At thirteen, a stem reprimand is in order. It's only bubble-blowing adults we shoot. ~ Day Leclaire

I actually like 'the Subs Club' as a name."
Kamen nodded. "We're like the Baby-Sitters Club. Except instead of babysitting, we're face-sitting."
"Kamen, gross. ~ J.A. Rock

I did babysit a little bit when I was young. I prefer babysitting for babies. I always loved babies. I was not as great with kids that wanted to be entertained and that wanted to talk. ~ Ari Graynor

I talked to Zrakovi this afternoon," Alex said, giving me an undecipherable look. "He's putting me back on sentinel duty for the next few weeks while you handle a special assignment."
Special assignment had an ominous ring to it.
"What kind of special assignment? And why am I hearing it from you instead of Zrakovi?" Elder Z was my boss, not Alex, however Mr. Bossy liked to think otherwise.
"You're going to be babysitting Jean Lafitte and making sure he doesn't try to take revenge on anyone for what happened last month."
At my horrified, speechless gape, Alex gave me a grim smile and held his glass of port up in salute as my dessert congealed into a lump in my stomach. "Good luck with that, Jolie. ~ Suzanne Johnson

Looks like I'll be the one babysitting you all. (Jericho)
It's okay, sweetie. I make a mean Band-aid. (Delphine) ~ Sherrilyn Kenyon

He tossed her over his shoulder and stalked back to the bedroom.
"What do you think you're doing?"
"I've had enough babysitting duty. It's time for some grownup action. ~ Terry Spear

All of my friends were doing babysitting jobs. I wanted money without the job. ~ Adam Horowitz

I realize that the times I have known some sort of inner peace in my life, those have always been times when I focused on helping others more than myself ... babysitting, cooking dinner for my family, cleaning up the house, talking to a friend on the phone and just listening to them vent about something or other without offering an opinion or judging. Those have been the moments when I get to stop obsessing about myself and really feel a sense of liberation. 'Freedom from the bondage of self ... ~ Nic Sheff

You could have mentioned that this kid never sleeps,"
Tim calls from the living room. We go in to find him slumped in the easy chair next to the pulled-out sofa bed. Andy's sprawled out on the bed, long tan legs in a V, George gathered in her arms. Duff, still in his clothes, lies across the bottom, Harry curled in a ball on the pillow under Andy's outstretched leg. Safety, as much as could be found, must have lain in numbers.Patsy's fingering Tim's nose and pulling on his bottom lip, her eyes wide-blue open.
"Sorry, man," Jase says. "She's usually good to go at bedtime."
"Do you have any idea how many times I've read If You Give a Mouse a Cookie to this kid? That is one fucked-up story. How is that a book for babies?"
Jase laughs.
"I thought it was about babysitting."
"Hell no, it's addiction. That friggin' mouse is never satisfied. You give him one thing, he wants something else, and then he asks for more and on and on and on. Fucked up. Patsy liked it, though. Fifty thousand times."
Tim yawns, and Patsy snuggles more comfortably onto his chest, grabbing a handful of shirt.
"So what's doin'?"
We tell him what we know - nothing - then put the baby in her crib. She glowers, angry and bewildered for a moment, then grabs her five pacifiers, closes her eyes with a look of fierce concentration, and falls very deeply asleep. ~ Huntley Fitzpatrick

I'm not saying all seniors should be running a city or running a business, but I am saying seniors are good for a lot more than simply running a bath, baking cookies or babysitting grandchildren. ~ Hazel McCallion

Get killed when I'm not babysitting, Lieutenant Kelly barked. They ~ James S.A. Corey

Why are you offering me ten thousand dollars a month for babysitting? You didn't pay the nannies that. It's ridiculous. For ten thousand a month, you should not only get child care, you should get your house cleaned, your laundry done, your tires rotated, and if I were you, I'd insist on nightly blow jobs. Did you think I wouldn't notice that you're still trying to keep your thumb on me? ~ Jennifer Crusie

Granana lives on the other side of the island. She's eighty-four, I'm twelve, and Wallow's fourteen, so it's a little ambiguous as to who's babysitting whom. ~ Karen Russell

I feel completely embarrassed and remember the lock on the door and think: He knows, he knows, it shows, shows completely.
"He's out back," Mr. Garret tells me mildly, "unpacking shipments." Then he returns to the papers.
I feel compelled to explain myself. "I just thought I'd come by. Before babysitting. You, know, at your house. Just to say hi. So . . . I'm going to do that now. Jase's in back, then? I'll just say hi."
I'm so suave.
I can hear the ripping sound of the box cutter before I even open the rear door to find Jase with a huge stack of cardboard boxes. His back's to me and suddenly I'm as shy with him as I was with his father.
This is silly.
Brushing through my embarrassment, I walk up, put my hand on his shoulder.
He straightens up with a wide grin. "Am I glad to see you!"
"Oh, really?"
"Really. I thought you were Dad telling me I was messing up again. I've been a disaster all day. Kept knocking things over. Paint cans, our garden display. He finally sent me out here when I knocked over a ladder. I think I'm a little preoccupied."
"Maybe you should have gotten more sleep," I offer.
"No way," he says. Then we just gaze at each other for a long moment.
For some reason, I expect him to look different, the way I expected I would myself in the mirror this morning . . . I thought I would come across richer, fuller, as happy outside as I was inside, but the only thing that showed was my lips puffy from kisses. J ~ Huntley Fitzpatrick

Miguel: We've only gone over 100x! Mika: K - gonna roc!! Billy: Glad ur babysitting, dumbass. U know how 2 shoot, right? Mika: Screw u! Kevin: Cut the crap - stay focused treat us like animals we'll show them animals Mika: Hear that! Miguel: Payback a bitch! ~ Sophie Jordan

Mellon is thirteen," Raisa said. "I hope you have experience babysitting, Micah, because you're going to need it. Assuming the Demonai don't assassinate you first. Married at thirteen, widowed at fourteen. Poor Mellony. ~ Cinda Williams Chima

The U.S. Census Bureau considers mothers the "designated parent," even when both parents are present in the home. When mothers care for their children, it's "parenting," but when fathers care for their children, the government deems it a "child care arrangement." I have even heard a few men say that they are heading home to "babysit" for their children. I have never heard a woman refer to taking care of her own children as "babysitting." A friend of mine ran a team-building exercise during a company retreat where people were asked to fill in their hobbies. Half of the men in the group listed "their children" as hobbies. A hobby? For most mothers, kids are not a hobby. Showering is a hobby. ~ Sheryl Sandberg

K to 12 is partly about babysitting the kids so the parents can do other things. ~ Bill Gates

I got a job as soon as I could - 11 or 12. I started babysitting and then I got a part-time job at a pharmacy in England. I just remember loving the feeling of going out and buying my own clothes! I'd go bargain-hunting and get secondhand vintage stuff. ~ Natasha Bedingfield

I told somebody once, 'You don't want the Herschel that plays football ... babysitting your child. When I am competing, I am a totally different person.' ~ Herschel Walker

What I would hope to do is painting, because I don't think I'm qualified for anything else. My last job would be babysitting, so I don't think Starbucks would even hire me. ~ Kristin Bauer Van Straten

Whatever the explanation, it's perfectly obvious that our educational system has nothing to do with education: it's a babysitting service designed to replicate the worst qualities of the parents. ~ Stephen R. Donaldson

Not all activities are equal in this regard. Those that involve genuine concentration - studying a musical instrument, playing board games, reading, and dancing - are associated with a lower risk for dementia. Dancing, which requires learning new moves, is both physically and mentally challenging and requires much concentration. Less intense activities, such as bowling, babysitting, and golfing, are not associated with a reduced incidence of Alzheimer's. (254) ~ Norman Doidge