Aunt B Quotes

Aunt B walked out onto the helipad wearing loose yoga pants. "I'm just here to stretch. Kate, want to help?"
"Sure."
Thirty seconds later, as I was flying through the air, I decided that this wasn't the best idea. ~ Ilona Andrews

The porch light came on and Aunt B swung the door open. Middle-aged and stout, with graying hair rolled into a bun, she looked like she should be baking cookies, not ruling a brood of social deviants with a penchant for hysterical laughter and kinky sex. ~ Ilona Andrews

One look at Rebecca and Aunt B would have an instant apoplexy.
Raphael's eyebrows furrowed. "My mother's approval isn't necessary."
Aha. "Does she know that? ~ Ilona Andrews

Please tell me there is coffee."
Aunt B grimaced. "They're already crazy. If I let them have coffee, they'd be bouncing off the walls. We have herbal tea,"
...
I needed to find Julie, find her mom, convince a sociopath to donate some blood for the good of mankind, and deal with a tentacled atrocity swaddled in cloth and his rabid mermaids. I needed coffee. ~ Ilona Andrews

What is the connection between you and our handsome host? Aunt B asked.
Blackberries taste much worse when they try to come back up your throat. "Uhhh ... "
"Uhhh is not an answer," Keira informed me.
Andre must not have told her about Hugh, and I had no desire to explain who my dad was. "We never met but we were trained by the same person. Now he works for a very powerful man who will kill me if he finds me."
"Why?" Keira asked.
"It's a family thing."
"That explains the attraction," Aunt B said.
"Attraction?"
"You're that thing he can't have. It's called forbidden fruit."
"I'm not his fruit!"
"He thinks you are. The word you're looking for is "smitten," my dear." Aunt B smiled. "I'm sure the way Megobari looked at you made Curran positively giddy. ~ Ilona Andrews

Will you stop meddling in my love life?" I growled.
"I'm not meddling. I'm offering commentary. ~ Ilona Andrews

Is there a cookie at the end of this lecture? ... I got a cookie after all ... Dear god, the cookie was poisoned. ~ Ilona Andrews

Andrea raised her hand. "This is the hand that slapped Aunt B."
"Maybe you should have it gold-plated."
"Here, you can touch it, since you're my best friend. ~ Ilona Andrews

Do you have spies in Clan Heavy?"
"I have spies everywhere."
I looked at Andrea, who was hoarding bacon on her plate.
"She had tea with Mahon's wife." Andrea said.
Aunt B looked at her. "You and I need to work on your air of mystery. ~ Ilona Andrews

You know," she said, stirring her tea, "the fastest way to get him off your back is to sleep with him. And tell him you love him. Preferably while in bed."
I smirked and the tea almost came out of my nose. "He'd run like he was on fire. ~ Ilona Andrews

Sorry about our . . . altercation in the buggy. I was only playing. I'm Raphael."
"The one who likes the hurting." I moved to shake his hand and he reversed it and kissed my fingers instead, singeing me with a look that was pure smolder.
I took my hand back. "That woke me up."
He smiled a picture-perfect smile. "Been a while?"
For some reason, I felt like answering. "Two years. And if you could tone down that smile, I'd appreciate it. Getting weak in the knees."
Raphael took a step back. His face took on the same concerned look I saw on Doolittle when I assured him I was fine. "Two years? That's entirely too long. If you want, we can take care of that. After two years, it's pure therapy."
"No thank you. Curran already offered to help me with that problem, and since I turned him down, I wouldn't want to cause any friction between you two." The last thing I needed was to set Curran and the hyenas on a collision course.
Raphael backed away with his hands in the air, strategically positioning himself behind Andrea. "No offense."
"None taken."
"Is Curran serious?" Aunt B asked.
She wanted to know if she now had to walk on eggshells around me. For once, I was happy to disappoint. "No, he's just being an asshole. Apparently every time he calls me 'baby,' I look like a red-hot poker is stuck up my butt. Causes him no end of fun."
Aunt B gave me an odd look. "You know," she said, stirring her tea, "the fastest way to get him off y ~ Ilona Andrews

There are two dedications. The first is Jessica's. To my precious children, Madalina, Ashur, Isabelle, and Grace, No mother could love her children more than I love you. Each of you is truly a gift from God that I cherish more than anything else in this world. And to Amy Sarah, my Beloved Princess. I only held you once, but you live on forever in my heart. Even you have a story." Kayne paused and bussed her temple before continuing. "The second dedication is from Darcy's kids. I may call you Mom, Grandma, Aunt, or some other name, the title doesn't matter to my heart. It only knows that it loves you. Happy Mother's Day. ~ Julieanne Reeves

Please have a seat, Henrietta. Winifred, thank you; that will be all. Ensure we're not disturbed."
The older woman bobbed a slight curtsey, giving Etta's back a parting pinch, hard enough to make her jump forward a step. Etta waited until the woman had vanished through the door in a swirl of dark skirts before turning to Henry and spitting out, "She doesn't travel through passages, does she? She sacrifices a puppy and flies through the centuries on her broom."


He gave a sharp cough into his hand.
"I assure you, your great-aunt is quite loving," Henry said, only to stop and reconsider. "That is, she's quite loving in her own way…every other Sunday. In May. Won't you sit?"
Great-aunt. No way in hell. ~ Alexandra Bracken

Justine, you may remember, was a great favourite of yours; and I recollect you once remarked that if you were in an ill humour, one glance from Justine could dissipate it, for the same reason that Ariosto gives concerning the beauty of Angelica - she looked so frank-hearted and happy. My aunt conceived a great attachment for her, by which she was induced to give her an education superior to that which she had at first intended. This benefit was fully repaid; Justine was the most grateful little creature in the world: I do not mean that she made any professions I never heard one pass her lips, but you could see by her eyes that she almost adored her protectress. Although her disposition was gay and in many respects inconsiderate, yet she paid the greatest attention to every gesture of my aunt. She thought her the model of all excellence and endeavoured to imitate her phraseology and manners, so that even now she often reminds me of her. ~ Mary Shelley

When a homemaking aunt scolds a niece for following her evangelistic passion instead of domestic pursuits, her reply is interesting. First, she clarifies that God's individual call on her doesn't condemn those in more conventional roles. Then, she says she can no more ignore the cry of the lost than her aunt can the cry of her child. ~ George Eliot

Ben: "Gorog's no assassin! She's my best friend." Mara: "She's an insect, Ben." Ben: "So? Your best friend's a lizard." Mara: "Don't be ridiculous. Aunt Leia is my best friend." Ben: "Doesn't count. She's family. Saba is a lizard." Mara: "Okay, maybe my best friend's a lizard. ~ Troy Denning

My aunt always says that if you put your mind to it, you can do absolutely anything," Jake said. "Is that true?" "No," I said. "It's nonsense. ~ Lemony Snicket

Awkward, like when a mad aunt starts up about Jesus at the dinner table. As Septimus showed him to the door, the sergeant replaced his hat and said quietly, "A cruel piece of mischief-making, looks like. I reckon it's about time to bury the hatchet against Fritz. All a filthy business, but there's no need for pranks like this. I'd keep it under your hat, the note. Don't want to encourage copycats." He shook hands with Septimus and made his way up the long, gum-lined drive. Back in his study, Septimus put a hand on Hannah's shoulder. "Come on, girlie, chin up. Mustn't let this get the better of you." "But ~ M.L. Stedman

Suddenly, from the depths of that chair emerged the biggest, meanest-looking dog Jesse had ever seen. One side of his face had suffered some disfiguring injury.
The jaw hung slack and the eye on that side was missing.
Jesse froze in her tracks, terrified that she might be mauled by this monstrosity of a pet. She glanced
around, looking for a stick or a rock or anything to defend herself. There was nothing close but she was afraid to move. Surely if the animal were dangerous, Floyd and Alice Fay would have said something. Jesse waited tensely for a moment before realizing the dog wasn't so much growling or barking as he was howling; loudly, purposefully howling.
"She don't bite," a voice called out. "She's my hillbilly alarm system, letting me know that they's strangers about. ~ Pamela Morsi

Aunt Esther: You think you supposed to know everything. Life is a mystery. Don't you know life is a mystery? I see you still trying to figure it out. It ain't all for you to know. It's all an adventure. That's all life is. But you got to trust that adventure. ~ August Wilson

Never," said my aunt, "be mean in anything; never be false; never be cruel. Avoid those three vices, Trot, and I can always be hopeful of you. ~ Charles Dickens

Thirty minutes later we were in Aunt Gene's carriage, Pam compulsively adjusting her bonnet, me meditating upon all of the ways it might be possible to kill myself with the in-cab stylus. ~ Lia Habel

Maybe your aunt is funny in quiet moments with her friends because like many women her age, she was taught to not draw attention to herself. And maybe she also noticed how men of her generation weren't attracted to the women who spoke out of turn and uttered their own opinions out loud. And certainly these types of men weren't attracted to women who were funnier than them. Women have always been funny. They just weren't interested in sharing their jokes with you. Truth in point, my mom is hilarious. She has also been single since 1974. ~ W. Kamau Bell

What poor and unfortunate creature had to die for you to wear that?" [pause] My Aunt Trudy, I replied. Walked away ladies and gentlemen, walked away! ~ Hedwig And The Angry Inch

In addition, each barrel of oil we save through conservation further decreases our dangerous reliance on unstable Middle East oil. ~ Paul Gillmor

My dad had an aunt at the turn of the century who died from diabetes, but she was the closest affected relative in my family. ~ Bobby Clarke

Easy for you to say," Polly said. "You've lived here all your life and stayed under the radar. No one points at you."
"Sometimes small children point at my butt," Aunt Rhea said. "But that's just on account of all the fried chicken. ~ Kathy Hepinstall

Lucille always loved a strong breeze. She said it was nature's way of blowing away our sorrows.'
Just then another gust of wind whipped around us. Aunt Tootie smiled. I smiled too. ~ Beth Hoffman

They helped each other with their corsets. Aunt Docia pulled as hard as she could on Aunt Ruby's corset strings, and then Aunt Docia hung on to the foot of the bed while Aunt Ruby pulled on hers.
"Pull, Ruby, pull!" Aunt Docia said, breathless. "Pull harder." So Aunt Ruby braced her feet and pulled harder. Aunt Docia kept measuring her waist with her hands, and at last she gasped, "I guess that's the best you can do."
She said, "Caroline says Charles could span her waist with his hands, when they were married."
Caroline was Laura's Ma, and when she heard this Laura felt proud. ~ Laura Ingalls Wilder

I know that whatever you decide, you'll be happy, Summer, and that is the only thing I could ever wish. Whatever happens in the rest of this summer, whatever happens the rest of your life, it's important that you are happy, and stay that way. – Aunt Sookie ~ Kailin Gow

The Steppenwolf, however, first threw up his sharp, closely cropped head and sniffed around nervously before he either made any answer or announced his name. "Oh, it smells good here," he said, and at that he smiled and my aunt smiled too. ~ Hermann Hesse

I will thank you not to be impertinent," said Aunt Josephine, using a word which here means "pointing out that I'm wrong, which annoys me". ~ Lemony Snicket

Matilda told such dreadful lies, It made one gasp and stretch one's eyes Her aunt, who, from her earliest youth, Had kept a strict regard for truth, Attempted to believe Matilda The effort very nearly killed her. ~ Hilaire Belloc

Fabulous Aunt Fancy had died on her sixtieth birthday while parachuting from an airplane. ~ Nancy Thayer

When it comes to the form the narrative will take, whether first person, third person, or Aunt Grace's cat, I usually find that the story tells me which voice it prefers, and that often changes as I go along. And in the end it really doesn't matter as long as the author can rig those voices all in harness to pull the same load. ~ Thomas Steinbeck

This was not Aunt Dahlia, my good and kindly aunt, but my Aunt Agatha, the one who chews broken bottles and kills rats with her teeth. ~ P.G. Wodehouse

I have always loved a hard-faced girl. I get that Alison Goldfrapp isn't easy, and I like her belligerence. She's deeply sexy and controlled, like a Strict Machine, and it seems to wind the b'jesus out of the women I know. On the outside, I watch and smile and will her on like a twisted silent maiden aunt in the dark corner. ~ Alison Moyet

I am pleased to see that many of the world's leaders have publicly recognized that the crisis in the Middle East was deliberately incited by terrorist organizations. ~ Alcee Hastings

Back at the hut, all my sister, they start to cry. "No crying," my aunt says, very strict. "You cry only in your mind."
But later, when everyone else asleep, I hear my aunt, her tears, they fall like rain. ~ Patricia McCormick

Oh, but Aunt Polly, Aunt Polly, you haven't left me any time at all just to- to live. ~ Eleanor Porter

Quick, nervy and jumpy -yet to the children she was as constant as a staff, a tree that can be counted on not to pull up its root and shift in the night. She was the tree that grew in the centre of their lives and in whose shade they lived. ~ Anita Desai

seemed to her that such a one abdicated all claim to enjoy the fruits of those friendly relations with people of good position which prudent parents cultivate and store up for their children's benefit, for my great-aunt had actually ceased to 'see' the son of a lawyer we had known because he had married a 'Highness' and had thereby stepped down - in her eyes - from the respectable position of a lawyer's son to that of those adventurers, upstart footmen or stable-boys mostly, to whom we read that queens have sometimes shewn their favours. ~ Marcel Proust

Theyre not group animals, theyre completely solitary, so if the babys mother is taken away, theres no system of aunts ... their whole system is destroyed. ~ Joanna Lumley

My dear, dear ladies," Sir Francis effused as he hastened forward, "what a long-awaited delight this is!" Courtesy demanded that he acknowledge the older lady first, and so he turned to her. Picking up Berta's limp hand from her side, he presed his lips to it and said, "Permit me to introduce myself. I am Sir Francis Belhaven."
Lady Berta curtsied, her fear-widened eyes fastened on his face, and continued to press her handkerchief to her lips. To his astonishment, she did not acknowledge him at all; she did not say she was charmed to meet him or inquire after his health. Instead, the woman curtsied again. And once again. "There's hardly a need for all that," he said, covering his puzzlement with forced jovially. "I'm only a knight, you know. Not a duke or even an earl."
Lady Berta curtsied again, and Elizabeth nudged her sharply with her elbow. "How do!" burst out the plump lady.
"My aunt is a trifle-er-shy with strangers," Elizabeth managed weakly.
The sound of Elizabeth Cameron's soft, musical voice made Sir Francis's blood sing. He turned with unhidden eagerness to his future bride and realized that it was a bust of himself that Elizabeth was clutching so protectively, so very affectionately to her bosom. He could scarcely contain his delight. "I knew it would be this way between us-no pretense, no maidenly shyness," he burst out, beaming at her blank, wary expression as he gently took the bust of himself from Elizabeth's arms. "But, my lovely, there's ~ Judith McNaught

I'm sorry, did you just say your boyfriend ditched you to go shoe shopping?" my mom asks her.

Charlotte sighs and crosses her arms in front of her. "He didn't ditch me. I told him he could go because I was tired."

"You don't really mean shoe shopping right? You meant to say shopping for sports equipment or a new surround sound system, right?" Aunt Liz asks.

"He told us his favorite book of all time was Under the Rainbow: The Real Liza Minnelli. I'm pretty sure shoe shopping would be right up his alley," Mom reminds her.

"Has Rocco gotten the memo yet that he's gay?" Aunt Liz questions her.

Tyler starts laughing hysterically and reaches his hand up to fist-bump my aunt.

"Seriously, Mom? Are you judging him? That's really low," Charlotte complains.

"I'm not judging him. Some of the best people I've ever met are gay. I just don't particularly want my daughter dating someone who's gay."

Charlotte stomps her foot and growls at Liz, and I have to tell myself not to get too excited. I love seeing her get fired up. Her cheeks turn pink and her eyes sparkle. Now is NOT the time to get a boner.

"He is NOT gay! He's just … he's in touch with his feminine side."

Tyler snorts and Charlotte shoots an angry look in his direction.

"Honey, he doesn't have a feminine side. He has a vagina," Aunt Liz informs her. ~ Tara Sivec

The look she leveled on him was pure aunt. ~ Seanan McGuire

Jack gave her a fierce look. "Your mother gave up the best thing she had in her life. I know you miss her, I know you're confused and have all sorts of questions for her. But you're better than her, Lola, you're better than all of this.

"She wronged you, not the other way around. You didn't do anything wrong. You didn't deserve what happened to you. She's the one that needs to feel bad, not you.

"Sometimes there are no answers. You have to accept that. Maybe you'll never know what you think you need to know, but do you really need to know all the details, really? You know she wasn't there when you needed her, she still isn't here when you need her, but look around, Lola." Jack opened his arms wide. "You got me. You got your aunt. Jared. Sebastian. Rachel. Even Isabelle.

"You need to realize that and move on, as best you can. I had to realize that myself. When you let go of the pain and hurt and unanswered questions, Lola, then you'll be okay. You're safe now." Jack pressed a kiss to her forehead. "You're safe now. Remember that. Believe that. ~ Lindy Zart

In the summer of 1964, my sister and I went to South Ballston, Virginia, to stay with my aunt and her kids. They passed the civil rights bill that summer; my cousins were so happy because now they could swim in the pool. ~ Edward P. Jones

And if my aunt had balls she'd be my uncle. ~ Tiffanie DeBartolo

She hasn't cried once. SHe doesn't understand that Margaret is dead. At that age, they can't fully understand the concept of death. It's a good thing really.
Jane fully understood the concept of death and she felt truly injured that Aunt Bess considered her unmoved. Jane thought it should be perfectly clear to everyone that rearranging the furniture in her dollhouse was her expression of grief. She had been moving the Mother Doll (it was a nuclear family of dolls that consisted of a mother, a father, a boy, and a girl) and all the Mother Doll's possessions into the dollhouse's attic. Jane wondered why tears were considered a superior form of grief to the rearrangement of one's dollhouse.
Feeling terribly misunderstood, Jane began to cry.
Oh listen, said Aunt Bess, she begins to understand. ~ Gabrielle Zevin

We live in a world where we have friends, neighbors, brothers, sisters, aunts, uncles, people we journey with for years who are gay. And we need to love, affirm and all of us together work on the real problems that we have in the world. ~ Rob Bell

I do not think a pilgrimage is a proper pilgrimage if you are also using it as an excuse to visit your favourite aunt, or buy silk cheaply to re-sell," she murmured sombrely. "That's just business dressed up in orange robes. ~ Claire North

- Aunt Artie?
- Why do you keep saying it like that? We loved each other more than anything. I can't imagine we could be different in your world. ~ Sherrilyn Kenyon

Aunt Fostalina says when she first came to America she went to school during the day and worked nights at Eliot's hotels, cleaning hotel rooms together with people from countries like Senegal, Cameroon, Tibet, the Philippines, Ethiopia, and so on. It was like the damn United Nations there, she likes to say. ~ NoViolet Bulawayo

I know that's a vague answer, but you just have to really pedal yourself around town and attempt to not get too discouraged. There is also a different kind of challenge for women, as they graduate into their 30s. It's hard. There isn't as much work. You're suddenly the aunt, or something. So, it's a process. ~ Anna Faris

My aunt put my cousins into a children's modelling agency, then my mum did it with us. Me and my sister got a few TV adverts, which was good pocket money. A director saw photos of me and asked me to do a short film. ~ Sullivan Stapleton

Despite everything my mom and doctor and dad have said to me about blame, I can't stop thinking what I know. And I know that my aunt Helen would still be alive today if she just bought me one present like everybody else. She would be alive if I were born on a day that didn't snow. ~ Stephen Chbosky