Amy Reed Quotes

But I am doing that thing I always do-the obsessing about what I don't have, the ignoring where I am now. ~ Amy Reed

Getting rid of the drugs doesn't get rid of all the other ways you learned to deal with the world. It's not that easy. ~ Amy Reed

That's what dreams are really like, you know? They're not full of melting clocks or floating roses or people made out of rocks. Most of the time, dreams look just like the normal world. It's your feelings that tell you something's off. Not your mind, not your intellect, not something as obvious as that. The only part of you that really knows what's going on is the part of you that's most a mystery. If that's not Surrealism, I don't know what is. ~ Amy Reed

I feel the ghost of his fingers inside me. ~ Amy Reed

This is the first time in I don't know how long that I've come even close to caring what happens next. I guess you could call that hope. ~ Amy Reed

The first week is the hardest. Then little by little the world opens up, and you realize there are all these people around you with their own needs that have nothing to do with you. Then you forget, and everything's about you again. And maybe that cycle continues for the rest of your life. Maybe the world keeps expanding and contracting. Maybe you know you're well when it finally stays the same size. ~ Amy Reed

I was trying to be brave. I was trying to let people in. I was trying. I am who I am today because of my messes. Because I've survived them. Because I've written about them. Because I've learned from them, because I keep searching for new tools to clean them up, because I keep trying to heal. ~ Amy Reed

And now they're telling me I have to get rid of the only thing that loosens its grip. That's the irony, isn't it? [...] The thing that helped has become the thing that imprisons us. We keep feeding it and it keeps wanting more. This is a disease that tries to convince you that you don't have it. This is a disease where the medicine that gives relief is the same thing that kills you. ~ Amy Reed

I'm not the girl they remember. I'm not anyone they know. ~ Amy Reed

Your memories of me are part trees and part ocean and part magic, and I don't know if I will ever be that girl again. She was the best version of me. ~ Amy Reed

You act like you're invincible, but I know deep down you want someone to hold your hand and buy you flowers and look you in the eye and tell you you're his soul mate. You want someone who will love every piece of you, even the pieces you can't love yourself. ~ Amy Reed

I said just let me try one more time and she said, "THAT'S ENOUGH, ISABEL," again, and she could just say it over and over and it would never get through my thick skull because I'm always wanting and wanting because nothing is ever enough you are never enough I am never enough I am never enough I AM NEVER ENOUGH. ~ Amy Reed

Everyone gets the message when they're a kid that girls like pink and boys like blue, but she's taken it to a whole new level, like being a girl is her religion and wearing pink is some kind of commandment. ~ Amy Reed

Even though I'm sleeping again, everything still feels a little rickety, like I'm here but not quite here, like I'm just a stand-in for my real self, like someone could just reach over and pinch me and I'd deflate. I thought I was feeling better, but I don't know anymore. ~ Amy Reed

I'm feeling really hopeful about it, like maybe I actually have a chance to get better. To be happy. It's funny, I just realized that my whole life, the whole time I've been trying to be perfect, I never once considered happiness as part of the equation. I guess it seemed so impossible I couldn't even let myself fantasize about it. But now, I don't know, things feel different somehow. Like impossible things might not be so impossible. ~ Amy Reed

Do you remember? Do you remember the world before the poison? ~ Amy Reed

The thing is, you don't get many choices when you're stuck in a secret. The world gets so small, you learn to be grateful for whatever you can get. ~ Amy Reed

There are voices you can silence. ~ Amy Reed

Sometimes I think you don't really believe the things you say; you just like the sound of yourself having opinions. ~ Amy Reed

This is the downside of being complete. Others want what you have. They covet your doneness. ~ Amy Reed

And my name sounds like flowers in his mouth. ~ Amy Reed

And that's when it hits me, the punch in the stomach, the carving out of my insides. That's when I realize that none of this is a movie. I will not go out with a bang. There is no ending. There are no credits. I will wake up and I will keep waking up and this will always be waiting for me. ~ Amy Reed

What Erin wants to do with pain is fix it, make it go away, and sometimes that's not what other people want. ~ Amy Reed

You never heard me tell you that I want everything, not just the perfect pieces, not just the sparkling, charming snapshots of you. You never let me tell you that I want every piece of you, even the broken ones, even the dark places where scary things hide. ~ Amy Reed

What are you supposed to do when you forget what normal feels like? ~ Amy Reed

Maybe there's a galaxy with a planet that's just a little more tilted, with a sun that shines just a little bit darker, and that's where I'm supposed to be, where it somehow makes sense to feel this broken. ~ Amy Reed

But just because she's not helpless doesn't mean she doesn't need help. ~ Amy Reed

Every since I got sick, all I've done is think about how everyone else is feeling. ~ Amy Reed

There is nothing lonelier than fear. ~ Amy Reed

Smoke follows beauty. ~ Amy Reed

Everybody has fucked-up families, even normal kids, even the ones who aren't in here. There's no magic math equation that makes us addicts, nothing that separates us from everyone else. ~ Amy Reed

Smoke is not chasing me and making my eyes sweat. My eyes are not burning. I am not crying. I am not standing behind my mother and she is not facing the wall and she is not saying, 'Smoke follows beauty.' Smoke follows beauty. Smoke follows beauty. Smoke follows beauty. ~ Amy Reed

This is the kind of thing that makes sense to them; this is a language they know. They know what to do with`disease'. They know how to attach a doctor's medical descriptions to hope. ~ Amy Reed

Maybe that's all love is-one person saying it because they think they're supposed to and the other person feeling to guilty to say anything else ~ Amy Reed

This thing that's always been inside and hidden deep is getting bigger and stronger and threatening to show itself, and I want to stop it but I also don't, and I don't know if I'm ready, but I think maybe I want what's inside turned outside, maybe I want everything out in the open, all my secrets laid out for everyone to see. I wonder what that would look like. I wonder what kind of mess it would make. I wonder if you can ever really be ready for the part of you that you've been hiding your whole life to finally come out. ~ Amy Reed

Everyone at school has their little group. Even the people nobody likes seem to tolerate each other enough to sit together at lunch. But I just sort of wander around by myself most of the time. It's almost be better if I thought no one liked me, if I had some weird tick or social inadequacy that cold easily explain my alienation but it's not that easy. People talk to me at school and invite me to parties, but something's missing on the smaller scale. I don't belong to anybody. I don't have anyone who is mine. ~ Amy Reed

It feels like the ground is breathing and the air has hands, like everything is moving except me, like I am the only thing solid, like it is the rest of the world that is dizzy. ~ Amy Reed

How can she stand up there so tall as she's telling us how her mother beat her and her father molested her when she was a little girl? How is it possible for her to look so proud? How is she not being consumed by shame? She should be disintegrating before our eyes. She should be struck by lightning, and God's big, angry, booming voice should be shaking the room with "How dare you? I told you never to tell." But that's not her God, she says. Her God is loving and kind and wants what's best for her. Her God loves peace and serenity and forgiveness. Her God doesn't make her keep secrets. I thought I knew God all my life, but maybe it was some other guy the whole time. I want this God. I want Val's God. I want a God who doesn't make me jump through hoops and hate myself to earn his love. ~ Amy Reed

Teen angst is so boring, isn't it? I try so hard not to be a cliche, but it's like written in my DNA to hate my parents and be totally unsatisfied with everything. I wonder if there's anyone our age who actually likes their life. ~ Amy Reed

I want to crush my cigarette on his eyelid. I would rather he keep fucking me for the rest of the night than lie here staring at me tracing my ribs with his fingertips, acting like what happened meant something. ~ Amy Reed

You can always cram the wrong piece into the puzzle hole if you push hard enough and limit your definition of 'fitting. ~ Amy Reed

And I know -I just know- you can remind me what it feels like to have someone look at me and love me with wanting me to be something else. ~ Amy Reed

I don't know what any of this means. All I know is I feel crazy, like I want to cry and laugh and scream at the same time. ~ Amy Reed

Your boyfriend smells bad, says Sarah as she sniffs the armpit of the giant sweatshirt.
All boys smell bad I say and she nods her head like we have just figured out something very important. ~ Amy Reed

Maybe this is all love is and all it will ever be
boys fucking girls and pretending it's love, girls getting fucked and pretending they like it, saying "I love you, too," and wanting to throw up. ~ Amy Reed

I don't feel great, but I also don't feel terrible, either, and I guess that's how normal people feel most of the time. They live in the space between black and white, and their ups and downs are various shades of gray, not the extreme highs and lows I've always thought of as normal. I think that's one of the major differences between us and them, between addicts and Normies. Somewhere along the line we got stuck on this roller coaster that only knows how to go to the highest up and the lowest low. We get high so we can feel invincible and perfect, but the feeling never lasts. Gravity always wins, and we fall fast, to a place lower and darker than many people will probably ever know. And the crazy thing is that this is just normal for us. We cycle through these extremes all the time, and it's become as natural as breathing. Exhausting, but natural. ~ Amy Reed

Silence does not mean yes. No can be thought and felt but never said. It can be screamed silently on the inside. It can be in the wordless stone of a clenched fist, fingernails digging into palm. Her lips sealed. Her eyes closed. His body just taking, never asking, never taught to question silence ~ Amy Reed

What if I can't ever be who you want me to be? What if I keep letting you down? ~ Amy Reed

No one knows what to do with me now that I'm alive. There's no protocol for how to treat someone who comes back from the dead. There are so many books about grief and loss, about saying good-bye to the people you love. But there is no book about taking back that good-bye. ~ Amy Reed

But Erin has empathy, lots of it, so much it hurts sometimes, so much that other people's pain turns into her own pain and makes her completely incapable of doing anything useful for anyone. That's why it's easier to avoid it than to engage. It's easier to try to ignore it than try to comfort whoever's hurting, because usually that backfires and makes things worse. ~ Amy Reed

Humans are capable of a lot more than they know. ~ Amy Reed

He backs out the door batting those eyelashes I thought were so sexy when I first met him. Now I want to pluck them out one by one. ~ Amy Reed

She says nothing to Pastor Skinner about how Jesus fought for what he believed in, how he stood up against corrupt people in power, how he showed women kindness and respect at a time in history when they received little of either. But that is not the Jesus who Pastor Skinner is talking about. In fact, the pastor isn't talking much about Jesus at all. ~ Amy Reed

I'd love to wrap myself inside your sadness and pretend it is mine ~ Amy Reed

Before there was Cocaine or vodka or sex or any of that, there was fantasy. There was escape. That was my first addiction. I remember being a little kid and imagining everything different, myself different. How did I get the idea in my head at age eight that everything was better somewhere else? Why would a child have a hole inside that can't get full no matter what she does? The real world could never make me happy, so I retreated to the world inside my head. And as I grew, as the real world proved itself more and more painful, the fantasy world expanded. ~ Amy Reed

I figure it's better to make a decision and do something rather than just sitting around thinking about it forever. Then at least I'll be moving. ~ Amy Reed

They are ghosts of people I never knew, which the rain will wash away. ~ Amy Reed

What if talking about your feelings doesn't fix anything? What if what you really need is to make the feelings go away? ~ Amy Reed

People grow up listening to all kinds of stories, but that doesn't mean they all want to spend their whole lives studying them. ~ Amy Reed

I don't know if anyone can ever really explain why they believe in someone. But I do. I believe in you. I hope that's worth something. ~ Amy Reed

I'm empty and lonely and lost and I'm starving, and there isn't enough in the whole wide world that could make me feel whole. ~ Amy Reed

And what they're doing could be called kissing but it's more like sword fighting with tongues. ~ Amy Reed

The things is," Rosina says, "people don't want to hear something that'll make their lives more difficult, even if it's the truth. People hate having to change the way they see things. So instead of admitting the world is ugly, they shit on the messenger for telling them about it. ~ Amy Reed

She hates the feeling of the world crushing her. She hates metaphors being the only way to describe it. ~ Amy Reed

I feel like I'm a snow globe and someone shook me up and now every little piece of me is falling back randomly and nothing is ending up where it used to be. ~ Amy Reed

Margot smiles. "Your comments are always thoughtful and smart. You seem really steady and calm, and not swayed by people's disagreements and emotions and everything."
"But I'm too quiet," Grace says.
"You don't have to be loud to be a leader," Margot says. "People respect you. That's what's important. ~ Amy Reed

Maybe sometimes you have to leave before you're ready to let go; sometimes you have to leave before someone is ready to let go of you. That's the rub of it-if you wait until you're ready to do everything, you'll never get anything done. ~ Amy Reed

I feel myself floating without the weight of him on my body. ~ Amy Reed

Fucked-up, Insecure, Neurotic, and Emotional. (FINE) ~ Amy Reed

How is feeling like a failure supposed to help me? The way I see it, they should invent some pill that just makes you forget whatever you want, some pill that makes you numb and functional. ~ Amy Reed

BEAUTIFUL is stark, disquieting and, quite simply, riveting. Amy Reed is an author to keep on your radar. ~ Ellen Hopkins

Phones are only good for ordering pizza and telling someone you're running late ~ Amy Reed

Me, I'm my own brand of perfect, I guess. The kind that has to work a little harder than everyone else. ~ Amy Reed

Is this what nice is? Letting people think things that aren't true just to avoid hurting their feelings? Being nice is dishonest. ~ Amy Reed

I wonder if anybody else feels this way, if anyone in here is as scared as I am. Are they as sad and angry and confused and ashamed? Is that even possible? Is it even possible for one building to hold all that pain? ~ Amy Reed

People don't just let you change identities, not unless there's something in it for them. ~ Amy Reed

I just wrapped 'Eclipse' yesterday and the last scene we shot is probably my favorite thus far. I finally got to tell my story, in a very gentle yet elaborate way. ~ Nikki Reed

THE AMPUTATED HEART
BEATS HARDER ~ Amy King

Taking us by and large, we're a queer lot
We women who write poetry. And when you think
How few of us there've been, it's queerer still.
I wonder what it is that makes us do it,
Singles us out to scribble down, man-wise,
The fragments of ourselves. Why are we
Already mother-creatures, double-bearing,
With matrices in body and in brain?
I rather think that there is just the reason
We are so sparse a kind of human being;
The strength of forty thousand Atlases
Is needed for our every-day concerns.
There's Sapho, now I wonder what was Sapho.
I know a single slender thing about her:
That, loving, she was like a burning birch-tree
All tall and glittering fire, and that she wrote
Like the same fire caught up to Heaven and held there,
A frozen blaze before it broke and fell.
Ah, me! I wish I could have talked to Sapho,
Surprised her reticences by flinging mine
Into the wind. This tossing off of garments
Which cloud the soul is none too easy doing
With us to-day. But still I think with Sapho
One might accomplish it, were she in the mood
to bare her loveliness of words and tell
The reasons, as she possibly conceived them
of why they are so lovely. Just to know
How she came at them, just watch
The crisp sea sunshine playing on her hair,
And listen, thinking all the while 'twas she
Who spoke and that we two were sisters
Of a strange, i ~ Amy Lowell

He talks about how the word "no" should be the "end of the discussion, not the beginning of a negotiation. ~ Amy Poehler

Closing the door to toxicity is the most effective way to make space for new opportunity. ~ Amy Chan

I remember," she said. "Lawrence Malley. He was an expert in security systems."
"Aka Lightfinger Larry." Dan grinned. "He was also wanted in five states."
"Great," Amy groaned. "I sent you to a tutorial with a crook."
"It got us in here, didn't it?"
"I guess I'm grateful to him, then," Amy said doubtfully.
"Don't be," Dan said. "The first lock I opened was on your diary. Don't worry, I read two pages and fell asleep. ~ Jude Watson

These days I realize that faith and fate have similar effects on the believer. They suggest that a higher power knows the next move and that we are at the mercy of that force. They differ, among other things, in how you try to cull beneficence and what you do to avoid disaster. ~ Amy Tan

I'd rather see what young people are going through than see things explode. ~ Amy Heckerling

You need me.'
'Jeru needs you more! And it is not safe. You aren't a sword. You aren't a weapon. Remember? What is something happens to Kjell, and I'm a bloody bird? Will you lead the men into battle alone? You will stay here, and you will do as I say!'
He was so adamant. So sure. So cold and hard. Telling me what to do. But I was a Teller. And I would not be told. ~ Amy Harmon

Creativity is connected to passion - that light inside that drives you. ~ Amy Poehler

If epigenetic changes caused by trauma such as the Holocaust, or enslavement, can be passed through generations, as researchers have recently found, perhaps some of us are hard-wired to be afraid because our history has taught us that fear is a kind of armor. ~ Amy Brill

I plan on ... encouraging so many women who are out there, who are still in the thick of it, who have yet to fight this fight, that you can do it, you can get through this one step at a time. ~ Amy Robach

What I should have seen was that his soul was just as black as his features. ~ Amy Noelle

Just a perfect day, problems all left alone. ~ Lou Reed

Wars are the hobbies of half-informed children who have somehow come into possession of the levers of power. ~ Fred Reed

It's kind of like you, Bonnie. You cut off your long hair too. Just like Rapunzel."
"That's right, Katy. That's because a mean old witch locked me up at Tower Records, and I had to wait for my boyfriend to get out of jail and come rescue me."
"What the fu - heck are you talking about?" Finn asked, amending his curse at the last minute for the sake of the little girl who was hanging on every word.
A little snort escaped out of my nose at the incredulous look on his face, and Katy giggled.
"Bonnie Rae," Finn choked out, finally laughing, "can we please change the subject? ~ Amy Harmon

back as a mud-smashing ~ Amy Tan

What she wants is a partner, two people building a normal, mostly boring life. My father can be counted on for the big things - a diamond, a house, a car, maybe flowers on Valentine's Day. But my mother cares more for the details, the day-to-day considerations that will elude my father, not because he doesn't care, but because he ~ Amy Monticello

Shhhh," Johnny soothed, sliding his hands up and down her back, nuzzling her hair. "Car thieves don't cry, baby. You gotta toughen up if you're gonna have a future with good old Clyde here."

"I like it when you do that."

"What?"

"Call me baby," Maggie whispered.

"You liked it when I called you Bonnie too," he replied with a smile in his voice. "Why?"

"You used to call me baby all the time. It makes me believe you can love me again."

Johnny wrapped his arms tightly around her waist and lifted her to him, kissing her tear-streaked cheeks before he touched his lips to hers.

"I'm already there Maggie. I fell in love when you begged me to help you escape the cops. I fell in love when we danced to Nat King Cole singing 'Stardust' on a moonlit beach. Hell, I fell in love when you told me how blondes spell farm."

"E-I-E-I-O," Maggie quipped wetly.

Johnny laughed and held her tightly. ~ Amy Harmon

No!" Amy said. "Dan, you're lucky it was only concussive. You could've wiped out the whole Holt family."
"And that would've been bad because ... ? ~ Rick Riordan

I didn't go to Hebrew school. ~ Amy Heckerling

Even though stories ended, there was always something left to be discovered. ~ Amy Koto

She is everything to me in life. Night after night I go to see her play. One evening she is Rosalind, and the next evening she is Imogen. I have seen her the in the gloom of an Italian tomb, sucking the poison from her lover's lips. I have watched her wandering through the forest of Arden, disguised as a pretty boy in hose and doublet and dainty cap. She has been mad, and has come into the presence of a guilty king, and given him rue to wear, and bitter herbs to taste of. She has been innocent, and the black hands of jealousy have crushed her reed-like throat. I have seen her in every age and in every costume. Ordinary women never appeal to one's imagination. They are limited to their century. No glamour ever transfigures them. One knows their minds as easily as one knows their bonnets. One can always find them. There is no mystery in any of them: ~ Oscar Wilde

Sleeping with another girl does not always mean you are a lesbian, sometimes it just means the central heating needs fixing ~ Amy Mah