Alice Clayton Quotes

Marry me." A statement. Not a question. It came again. "Marry. Me." His eyes burned into
mine. I breathed in, my ears ringing. My pulse sped up, my heart raced, I was trying to remember exactly what breathing meant. I was wet, and I was gasping.
"I want you. I want that, what they had today. I want it all, and I want it with you. I want you, want you to be my wife. I've got a ring, I'll give it to you right now if you'll say yes." With every
word, his hands tightened on my hips, desperate, crazy, longing. "I had this all planned out, so much smoother and romantic and everything you deserve. But my head's been spinning since
yesterday, when I saw my best friend steal a van to go meet his new family. And all I want, all I've ever wanted, is exactly that. Exactly you. And when I walked up those stairs, and heard the
shower go on, and knew you were in here all naked and wet and waiting for me, I knew I couldn't wait another day, another hour, another minute, without asking you to be my wife. So. Marry. Me."
He knelt. Christ on a crutch, he knelt on the shower floor, where he had knelt countless times before . . . ahem . . . took my hand, and repeated those words
again. Finally, with a question mark at the end. "Marry me?"
And in that moment, I realized all the worrying, all the hand wringing and wonder ponder, all the thoughts about who says what's right for a couple, and when is it too soon, and when is it the right time, and if it ain't b ~ Alice Clayton

Grace does not share ice cream. She does, however, talk about herself in the third person. ~ Alice Clayton

I love the shit out of you. So calm down and just tell me what you need. -Simon ~ Alice Clayton

Prepare yourself, I'm taking bread out of the oven.
Don't tease me, woman ... zucchini? Cranberry orange.
Mmmm ... No woman has ever done breakfast bread foreplay the way you do. ~ Alice Clayton

Spare no details-this shit is better than HBO. ~ Alice Clayton

I moaned like a whore in church.
To be fair, I'd never actually heard a whore moan in church, but I had a feeling it sounded a lot like the unholy sounds pouring forth from my mouth. ~ Alice Clayton

Well, considering my entire life, now seems rules by odd coincidences, I figure it's right on track. ~ Alice Clayton

Was this Cowboy Hank? Oh my, yes, it was. Because his belt buckle told me so . ~ Alice Clayton

I'm hardly just someone. I think I rate a little higher than that, ~ Alice Clayton

So, how is the British invasion going? Has he invaded your hoohah yet? ~ Alice Clayton

Caroline, I love the shit out of you. So calm down and just tell me what you need. No more holding back. And then I'll tell you what I need, and we'll figure out how to work it out. ~ Alice Clayton

We have to stop, this is insane. I literally cannot handle anymore. I think I've lost brain function. I can actually feel myself becoming stupid"
...
"Not possible. Let's test it. What's two times two?"
"Orange? ~ Alice Clayton

Truth or dare, you little shit. ~ Alice Clayton

It doesn't always have to be so hard. Sometimes falling in love just means turning around and seeing what's right in front of you. ~ Alice Clayton

My shirt bunched up around my waist, and the feeling of his hi-there against my hoohah was indescribable. ~ Alice Clayton

So what do we do next? Y'know, as people in a relationship after they've solved a conflict."
"Pretty sure a blow job should follow this," he said seriously. ~ Alice Clayton

I fucking love you, you goddamned librarian. ~ Alice Clayton

I'm done with easy."
"You should print that on cards."
"Print this - why do you still have clothes on? ~ Alice Clayton

But as close friends and lovers could be, there was something about belonging to someone completely that gave you roots--roots you sometimes needed when the world battled against you ~ Alice Clayton

You didn't really bring me beets, did you?" ...
"I did," he murmured, his thumbs sliding underneath my T-shirt the tiniest bit. "I brought mad beets."
"Oh man," I snorted ... "Did you bring me anything else?"
He brought his face back to mine, tinged with the slightest of blush. "I hesitate to say it now."
"What did you bring?" I asked his shaking shoulders.
He buried his head once again into my neck. "A really big zucchini ... ~ Alice Clayton

Dark chocolate was supposed to be good for you, right? ~ Alice Clayton

It wasn't sweet and tentative, it was pure carnal frustration spiked with incomprehensible lust and rolled into a giant ball of please-god-let-me-live-in-this-man's-mouth-for-the-foreseeable-future. ~ Alice Clayton

Pushing thoughts of spanking and Simon from my mind, I went back to my DVDs. Spanking Simon. What a great name for a band. ~ Alice Clayton

You can't . . . know someone that long and suddenly know how to handle it when they just disappear from your life. You can't be with someone that long and not still feel the need to step in, to fight for them, to protect them. ~ Alice Clayton

You realize you are turning me into some kind of machine?" he noted, nodding down at his HiThere poking through the towel. Simon took the time to place his zucchini bread safely on the coffee table."How cute is that? It's like he's poking his head out from behind a curtain!" I clapped my hands."You may not be aware, but as a general rule, no man likes the word cute in the same sentence as his junk. ~ Alice Clayton

I'm a reasonably attractive young gal, great rack, nice legs, and never had any complaints in the sack. But I'd never been - cue sad music - in love before. And no one had ever been - cue sadder music - in love with me. ~ Alice Clayton

Ok, look. Whenever I hear people say that they felt 'sparks,' I usually think it's a load of poo. I mean, I have felt attraction to people, sure, and I have even felt some instant lust. But sparks? Please... Then he touched my skin. Sparks. Sparks. Sparks. Hot sparks. Flashing sparks. Lightning bolt sparks. J esus, Mary, and Joseph sparks. ~ Alice Clayton

Just trying to get a visual of you on the beach in Spain ...
How's that working out for you?
Pretty spiffy.
Spiffy? Did you just say spiffy?
I typed it actually. You got something against spiffy? ~ Alice Clayton

Grace, did you just sniff my shirt?" He asked, incredulous.
"Yep, I did. What of it? And after you leave, I'll probably lay on your side for a while because the pillow smells like you. I'm ridiculous when I'm in love. We're talking Hallmark over here. ~ Alice Clayton

I'm waiting for the magic word." "Um, now?" "Really?" "Asshole?" "Come on." "Clark!" "Vivian." "Oh, fine. Please help me, Clark. Please, please, please?" I managed, gritting my teeth. "That wasn't so bad, was it?" he smiled, his face lighting up. ~ Alice Clayton

Give it up, mister! No sex for you!" I yelled at the wall as my girls cackled maniacally.
"Tons of sex for me, sister. None for you!" he yelled all too clearly through the wall. ~ Alice Clayton

I had the life I wanted. And I wasn't afraid to say no to somthing more. ~ Alice Clayton

This is the heart I need. And if I have this - and a little schmaltz - I dont need anything else in the world ~ Alice Clayton

I didn't think I could love you more, but I really kind of do. ~ Alice Clayton

Why ride a cowboy when you can ride a librarian? ~ Alice Clayton

After about ten seconds, he inhaled and shook ~ Alice Clayton

The feeling of his skin against mine was perfection, and something I'd never experienced before. I felt worshipped. ~ Alice Clayton

I tend to lose control when pie crust is involved. ~ Alice Clayton

I observed the cowboy in his natural element. He liked to work with no shirt on, which seemed so perfectly right and not at all beefcake. ~ Alice Clayton

Oh, look at that - tomatoes. Harvested by hand, from plants nurtured in perfectly tilled soil by perfectly bearded hipsters, in the land of organic milk and asshole honey, where everyone was happy and in tune with the earth, and the entire world narrowed down to slow, sustainable, and the concept du jour - local.
Fuck local. I'd fucked local, and look where it got me. Angry/not angry, listening/not listening for a phone call or text, feeling/not feeling overwhelmed, confused, betrayed, and slightly ... used? ~ Alice Clayton

Don't be ungrateful. Just open it. ~ Alice Clayton

He totally came up here to see you. Girl, you are on. ~ Alice Clayton

When there was pain or hurt, or bad memories crowded in, work could be a literal lifeline, taking your mind away from what you couldn't deal with and channeling it into something good, something tangible. ~ Alice Clayton

Dirty talk is an art. Do it too often, it becomes routine. Never do it, and you're missing something. Simon did it just right. He was like a perfect bowl of smutty porridge: just right. ~ Alice Clayton

Oh , God, the British Have landed, Haven't they? ~ Alice Clayton

Her skin glowed, her hair was luxurious, her eyes sparkled, and her tits were even more fantastic. ~ Alice Clayton

Okay, Dawson's be damned, I really like you, Caroline. But I haven't had a girlfriend since high school, and I have no clue how to do this. But you need to know, that what I feel for you? Shit, it's just different, okay? And, whatever your wall would say back home, I need you to know that this? What we have, or will have? It's different, okay? You know that, right? ~ Alice Clayton

He was wooing me. And I was letting him woo. I wanted the woo. I deserved the woo. I needed the wow that would surely follow the woo, but for now, the woo? It was whoa. ~ Alice Clayton

If I was going to have a life of air and nothing, I'd at least like a big fat dick to bounce on. ~ Alice Clayton

It breaks my heart the way young girls pick themselves over, never thinking they're good enough. You make sure you always remember, you're exactly the way you're supposed to be. Exactly. And anyone who says otherwise, well, poppycock. ~ Alice Clayton

A minute. What the hell? Are you really entertaining the idea of a ... gulp ... relationship? And why the fuck did I actually think the word "gulp"? That was a little dramatic, Parker. ~ Alice Clayton

You gonna bang my walls, Simon?" I laughed.
"You have no idea," he promised. ~ Alice Clayton

And a fire in the fireplace? Wow, that's impressive." I continued, walking backwards into the room.
"Yeah, I saw it in a book about how to woo women ... apparently you all like to be boinked in front of a roaring fire. ~ Alice Clayton

She was giggling. She was a dirty, dirty giggler. ~ Alice Clayton

There was a hickey on the side of my neck the size of a quarter. I looked like I had argued with a Hoover and the Hoover won. Jesus. ~ Alice Clayton

I wouldn't say I know him, but I'm familiar with his work. ~ Alice Clayton

Was I seriously awake at, let's see, one
sixteen a.m. and attempting to discern the national origin of
the woman getting plowed next door? ~ Alice Clayton

So if you think for a second I'm going to let you end this without giving me a legitimate reason, you are truly crazier than I thought. I'm in this thing with you, a willing participant, and you can't decide for both of us. Not anymore. ~ Alice Clayton

I started to roll my eyes, but that hurt. The right one was pressed so firmly against the peephole, you see. ~ Alice Clayton

Wine?"
"Am I breathing?"
"Wine it is. ~ Alice Clayton

You're here and I'm here and we're here and this is so much more than enough because it's everything. ~ Alice Clayton

Sometimes you have to pretend to be feeling better to actually feel better. It's why new workout clothes make you feel like you want to work out. ~ Alice Clayton

I knew I should have changed your name from Nightie Girl to Naughty Girl. ~ Alice Clayton

I forgot a detail I read in your file. Won't happen again."
"My file?"
"You don't think I'd let my father hire someone to turn our entire world upside down and not do my due diligence to make sure she's qualified, do you?"
My eyes boggled. "A file. You've got a file on me. Wow."
"Wow?"
"Wow as in, dude, that's weird."
Now his eyes boggled. "Dude? Did you just call me dude?"
"Dude, I also called you weird. How did you miss that part? ~ Alice Clayton

Fucking gorgeous man. And the best part? The way he looked at me. Like I was the prettiest girl in the room.
"Hey, baby."
The man was a poet.
"Hey."
I was too. ~ Alice Clayton

High school Simon was big man on campus. He'd had his own posse of what I called the apostles (his old pals Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John), headed by his old bestie, Trevor. ~ Alice Clayton

He shook his head. "You're a bit of a train wreck, aren't you?" I puffed a bit of hair away from my face. "Choo choo? ~ Alice Clayton

He opened his mouth to speak, finally initiating conversation with me!
"'Sup, Viv?"
The man was a poet. I had no words. Strike that, I had one.
"'Sup?"
He grinned at me, and I swear on all that is holy a sunbeam broke through the clouds and shone directly on him, highlighting the planes of his exquisite face and letting me know that beauty had a name, and its name was Hank. ~ Alice Clayton

Simon does commando. God bless America. ~ Alice Clayton

You know those moments when everything is exactly the way it was meant to be? When you find yourself and your entire universe aligning in perfect synchronization, and you know you couldn't possibly be more content? I was inside that very moment, and fully conscious of it. ~ Alice Clayton

It was like pulling one loose thread on a sweater, and suddenly, poof, no sweater! And you're standing naked in a new hotel with terrible lighting. ~ Alice Clayton

When you were in a long-distance relationship, of course you made the most of the time you were together. But sometimes, it was the unexpected that really made the difference. The unexpected emotions you were hit with when you saw that face, looked into those eyes, felt those lips. The unexpected reminder of why you fell in love with this person could hit you so powerfully. And this was that time. ~ Alice Clayton

Oh please, like you don't know. You're bigger than a breadbox! ~ Alice Clayton

-"Wow,are we becoming friends?" I asked.
-"Hmmm ... friends." He appeared to think carefully and examined me and my state of blush.
"Yes, I think we are."
-"Interesting. From cockblocker to friend. Not bad." I giggled. ~ Alice Clayton

For the record, I am so turned on by your elbow patches, I'm coming out of my skin over here. ~ Alice Clayton

I felt a tap on my shoulder. I knew it was him. My skin told me. ~ Alice Clayton

Did you feel that?" he asked, concern crossing his face. "Yeah, I felt it. You too?" I answered, flirting back. "No, I mean, yes, obviously I felt that, but didn't you feel that hit your head?" he asked, beginning to grin broadly. "What are you talking about?" I asked, raising my hand up to my hair. "Oh, Jesus, Grace, a seagull just shit on your head," he stated, beginning to shake. "What? ~ Alice Clayton

Love is messy, painful and emotionally draining. It hardly seems worth it. ~ Alice Clayton

Can I get you anything? Water? Tea? Anything?"
I turned to face him, as he stepped inside. "No water, no tea, but there is one thing I'd like before I go to sleep," I purred, taking a few steps his way.
"What's that?"
"Goodnight kiss?"
His eyes darkened. "Oh, hell, is that all? That I can do." He closed the distance between us and slipped his arms easily around my waist. ~ Alice Clayton

But when you go weeks without that same 190 pounds in your bed, the truth is, it felt kind of nice to sleep underneath that. Or at least, off to the side just a little bit. I loved him, but I loved my kidneys too. ~ Alice Clayton

Be aware of the walls you build and what could be on the other side ~ Alice Clayton

I panted like a whore in church. The Church of Simon ... where I was dying to kneel before him. ~ Alice Clayton

Megan was able to get me the single most important item in this entire house."
"She got you that new vibrator?"
"Jesus ... "
"Oh, the cookbook, right," he said, remembering.
Megan used to work for the Food Network, and was able to secure me a signed copy of the original Barefoot Contessa cookbook. ~ Alice Clayton

The sounds pouring forth from his nasal passages registered somewhere between grizzly bear and exploding tractor trailer. ~ Alice Clayton

Brushed the side of his hand! Slut! ~ Alice Clayton

I'm not interested in dating anyone right now. I just got here, and I'm dealing with some stuff-"
"Everybody's dealing with some stuff, darlin'. Sometimes it's just nice to deal with it while looking at a gorgeous hunk of man. ~ Alice Clayton

His eyes were on my behind. And when caught? Didn't even have the decency to blush. Naughty boy. ~ Alice Clayton

Hey, Babe."
The man was a poet.
"Hey."
I was too. ~ Alice Clayton

I got into Jillian's Mercedes and drove back across the bridge to wait for my art installation. Which never showed up. Hey, art installation? Suck my dick. ~ Alice Clayton

You want to know if that's the only reason I called, Vivian? he asked finally, his voice octaves and octaves lower than Daytime Clark. Raspy, gruff, rough-and-tumble. ~ Alice Clayton

I agree with you. Everyone gets lonely sometimes. ~ Alice Clayton

Why do all men seem to think they need to rescue a woman? Are we not capable of rescuing our damn selves? Why do I need to be rescued? I don't need a man to rescue me, and I certainly don't need no wallbanging, Purina-fucking, listening-at-my-wall-like-a-goddamn-psycho coming over here to rescue me! You got that, mister? ~ Alice Clayton

Finally, I felt him, exactly where he was meant to be. Barely nudging inside, just the feeling of him entering me was earth-shattering. My own needs quieted for the moment, I watched his face as he began to press inside me for the first time. His eyes bore into mine as I cradled his face in my hands. He looked as though he wanted to say something, and I wondered. What words would we speak, what wonderfully loving things would we say to commemorate this moment?
"Hi."
"Hi. ~ Alice Clayton

I'm very cute when I'm vulnerable. ~ Alice Clayton

Funny thing about getting proposed to in a shower. You can't tell which is water and which is tears. I said yes, and then he kissed me. I said yes, and then he touched me. I said yes, and then he slipped inside me. I said yes, yes, yes, and then he loved me. ~ Alice Clayton

Dream Caroline and Dream Simon were some naughty kids. ~ Alice Clayton

Don't you see that I'm trying to do exactly that? How in the world can I grow up if I continue to do as I'm told, smiling and nodding like some pretty robot? What kind of a life is that? ~ Alice Clayton

Like I could stop? Don't you know I dream about this when I'm away?" he asked, nudging me with his nose, exactly where I needed his mouth to be.
"You ... dream about ... this?" I asked, arching my back. I was so close, so very close.
"Fuck, yes, are you kidding?" He flattened his tongue and dragged it across my entire sex, dipping inside and continuing up, closing his mouth now and encircling me with his lips. Releasing me with a groan of his own, he brought one hand down, using his fingers to press into me. "I think about this, and the sounds you make when you come, the way you taste. Mmm ... sweet Caroline, you drive me crazy. ~ Alice Clayton

You give good woo. ~ Alice Clayton

I turned to kiss his fingertips. He stared into my eyes again, those sex sapphires doing their voodoo that made me a puddle of voodoo goo. For him to woo. See what he did to me? ~ Alice Clayton