Mike Judge Quotes

Why should every single character be an honor student who goes around helping others and never doing anything wrong? Is that like the rule or something?

Peter Gibbons: The thing is, Bob, it's not that I'm lazy, it's that I just don't care.
Bob Porter: Don't... don't care?
Peter Gibbons: It's a problem of motivation, all right? Now if I work my ass off and Initech ships a few extra units, I don't see another dime; so where's the motivation? And here's something else, Bob: I have eight different bosses right now.
Bob Slydell: I beg your pardon?
Peter Gibbons: Eight bosses.
Bob Slydell: Eight?
Peter Gibbons: Eight, Bob. So that means that when I make a mistake, I have eight different people coming by to tell me about it. That's my only real motivation is not to be hassled; that, and the fear of losing my job. But you know, Bob, that will only make someone work just hard enough not to get fired.

I've got a huge, gigantic deal. We're talking about huge deals.

You know, at that age you want to show everyone else how wild you are. It's a combination of being bored, looking for a cheap thrill and being really stupid - a dangerous combination.

I went to a Catholic high school and it seemed like every time I drew something for a class project, it either got thrown away by the teacher or something.

One thing I always heard from the begining when I talked about this being a movie - was that the rule is that animated movies don't work unless they're Disney movies for kids. Unless they're family movies.

He's no idiot, in fact he's a genius... and that's as far from an idiot as you can get without reaching madness.

There was a time when cell animation was poison, but after Family Guy now everyone wants it.

One thing I was thinking about is that they probably get their come-uppance about the same percentage that people in real life do. Basically, stealing for all practical purposes might as well be legal in New York.

I'm sorry I can't get into Scooby Doo on any level.

Who is Mike Judge? Let me think. The only way I could possibly answer that question would be in a nonverbal fashion. I think I could do an interpretive dance that would answer that question for you.

When I was a kid it was like, who could be the coolest? Who could do the stupidest thing? And you knew it was a stupid thing to do, but you would do it just so you could be the coolest guy. And then you end up doing really cruel crap.

I think I do too many voices in these shows. I think it's because we have trouble getting voice talent.

She defaced my fly. And I've never been the same since.

I don't think any movie I would do would be too serious or serious at all.

You ought to try being cruel to some people.

Stealing, you'll go far in life. Actually, there is something funny about getting away with it.

It's amazing what we can get away with and what we can't. But it's not for me to decide.

It seems like there's a lot of people who just do not understand satire. They think it's weird. There's people who just don't understand you portray something or just explore a character, it means you're condoning it, saying this is the way to live.

I'm fine watching stuff on tape, to me casting is the most painful part of the whole process, it's like going on a horribly awkward date every five minutes for eight hours, and people come in and they'll be someone good but they're not right, and you want to tell them they're good, but it sounds like BS, and they're looking at your face to see how they did, what adjustments they need, and it's just so emotionally draining, and it goes on and on.

I actually saw a kid and went home and drew him. I don't even know who he was. I was buying a TV set in Circuit City. I was looking at this kid and he was kind of standing there, staring off into space. Kids are pretty chubby nowadays because of all the fast-food places. I grew up eating fast food but now everything is double beef and double cheese. So there are a lot of these chubby boys with long, baggy shorts.

People say that the Beavis voice doesn't sound like me or some other voices. Butt-Head I think sounds like me.

I like the Stooges. You know what movie I saw that I sort of discovered late was Jerry Lewis in 'The Nutty Professor'. I really liked that.

I put the storyboard down and came back to it like two weeks later and saw that I had written 'Butt-Head' next to the picture, and it kind of made me laugh and I thought, Well, might as well go for every laugh you can get.

I almost didn't name Butt-Head 'Butt-Head.' I came real close to calling him something else.

Susie Lynn, the producer of those segments, goes in and lays all the voices over the video.

It was really weird, when this thing started, to hear lawyers and MTV people calling me and actually saying 'ButtHead.' People tried to avoid it too.

I've seen a lot of pairs of guys that have been hanging out together way too long-until they're laughing all the time.

I don't return anybody's calls unless it's going to mean extra money for me. And I've completely cut off all relationships with any friends that I had before the show. And I've copped an attitude.

In order to have a plot, you have to have a conflict, something bad has to happen.

They're free because they don't know any, better. So they can just run around and do whatever, and do whatever, and most of the time they don't get caught.