Donald Glover Quotes

You can't live your life on a bus...

We had a teacher, named Mr. Brown, and he was writing something on the board once - he was writing something on the board, and he farted. And you would have thought kids had seen the face of God. Kids weren't even laughing; they were just sitting there screaming, just screaming. Kids had to get carted out; kids were screaming. Kids had to get carted out, and they were going to the nurses' office. Kids are crying in the hallway. 'Oh, this is our 9/11.' And it was. It was their 9/11 'cause they never thought anything like that could ever happen.

I hope a kid listens to my stuff, I hope there's a change made and at least somebody walks away with: "I'm doing this because I like it." People are going to hate it and that's okay, but I have to do it because my happiness is important too, it's worth it.

The only reason I'm able to do music is because I'm making money on 'Community.' If I wasn't, I couldn't pay for things.

A lot of my sketches came from thoughts, and I always just wanted to act them out.

I personally don't believe people really grow. They just learn stuff when they were a kid, and hold on to it, and that affects every relationship they have.

They say my public persona don't have enough appeal, I take a lesson from Kanye and give 'em something real.

Never kiss in public, but at home I am affectionate.

If I'm a faggot spell it right, I got way more than two G's

You have to be real with yourself. No one is doing that. People are too concerned with making everything look nice and calm and pretty.

I hate it when you really think you're getting something good ... and you don't listen to your dudes when you really should.

If you're on Twitter, what you're saying is, 'I'm important enough for you to care what I think.'

I try and go to as many places as possible. It's really cool that I even get to see different places.

I don't want to sit there and be like, 'Oh, I don't care what the audience thinks.' It does matter to me. I just want them to think, to be honest.

One thing my dad once said to me, "You either want to be right, or you want to be happy. To be happy, there's gotta be a conversation."

Suicide is kinda dumb to me. If I wanna kill myself I will. It's not hard to die, I could do it like right now. But why is everybody pretending like everything's ok, Everything's not ok. We are more connected than we've ever been, But I feel more alone than I've ever been.

But I just think I was lucky enough to figure out early on that I wanted to do comedy, so that's what I put all my effort into.

You started rapping when you wasn't good at basketball. I started rapping because I needed Adderall.

Rapper, just puts so much connotation on who you are and what is exposed. Even if a lot of it is out-dated, people still bring a lot to it.

Most people think I'm Danny Glover's son when they meet me. So when they ask, I say 'No, I'm Crispin Glover's son.' Then we stare at each other for a long time.

Don't be mad cuz I'm doing me better than you doing you.

When you think of the former high school football star, you think 6-foot-2, white, meathead as the model for that kind of character. Since I'm not 6-foot-2 or white, I just thought about what I could bring to it. I thought about Smash Williams from 'Friday Night Lights,' like the cocky quarterback, and played around with that.

Writing is a very strenuous thing - it's like banging your head against a wall. At the end of the day, acting is better, just because nobody ever asked me if I wanted a Pellegrino in the writer's room.

I try to be me to the utmost.

Kept looking for something to be in with. Follow someone's blueprint. But you have to be on your own.

Dress like a gentleman, but my mouth is never civilized.

The emotional aspects of a wilderness experience might be compared to a religious experience. It is particularly valuable for those people whose unconscious associations of pain and discomfort in relationships to man render a deity in human form impossible. Christianity is unacceptable to some people because of the use of the human symbol, but some who can't accept Christ can gain a tremendous sense of peace from relating to uncontaminated areas.

I would never challenge any rapper to a rap-off. It's weird, I'm not that type of rapper.

I hope people come to the shows because they feel like there's something there that I can't necessarily articulate, but it's real and it's fun.

I just keep losing. I mean, some people just...are supposed to lose? For balance in the universe? I mean, like, are there just some people on earth who...are supposed to be here just to make it easier for the winners?

The thing about stand-up was, I was doing all this sketch and YouTube stuff where I was not being censored and I got to do my own thing, and it was really cool.

Yes I'm grown and sexy, and I'm worth the wait. Girls act like I'm the only dude on earth to date.

What's the point of rap if you can't be yourself, huh?

Twitter does have an effect on everything - things you put out there, they are out there for good.

We put stereotypes on ourselves. Everybody does that. But I think it's just a little harder for black kids to just be who they are.

To all my fans who's saying Donald Glover about to blow, just give me six months so you can say I told you so.

I am what I am, everything I wanna be

I'd much rather have AIDS than a baby ... They're not that different at all. They're both expensive, you have them for the rest of your life, they're constant reminders of the mistakes you've made and once you have them, you pretty much can only date other people who have them.

When I wanna be a superhero I just wake up.

I feel like ... I don't have a wife, I don't have a kids, but ... I see rappers and I'm like, I know that's fake. I know how much you make, this is all bullshit. But people are buying into it, and you shouldn't have that power. I'm legit trying to make honest moves so that all of us can grow. I want to make a show where my sister can work on and become a producer because she can't get in, no one's leting her. I want to make things where people can actually grow. A place where people can actually be honest.

People are sometimes like: "Oh man, you're so talented and you do a bunch of stuff." I'm not! I swear to god, I'm not. I just like learning stuff, I like doing stuff. And I feel like everybody can definitely do it.

I think that's what makes a good rapper. Somebody who wants to push themselves and their audience further.

We lay out our lives in a narrative we understand, like a movie, but are you enjoying making it or are you wondering who's watching my movie.

May your dreams be sweet and your nightmares be spooky-monster-scary and not grandma-died-scary.

Usually, if I think something is really funny, I'm not gonna test it. I'll just test it when I'm onstage.

When anybody pays you to be creative, you're very lucky.

If it makes you nervous- you're doing it right.

You know who was on time tonight, which surprised me? Ghostface. Ghostface was early and making calls - what rapper does that?

I feel like guys don't think it's cool to use emojis. I'm like, that's so whack. Emojis help so much. They really do give context to something.

I'm probably going to get in trouble for this but 'American Dad' is one of my favourite shows. It gets very dark in places but the jokes are there.

I started doing '30 Rock' and started writing 'Mystery Team' at the beginning of that. While I was doing 'Mystery Team,' I started practicing stand-up. While I was doing stand up, I got 'Community.' It's like I planted trees six years ago, and now they have fruit.

I call 'Community' the best day job in the world, because between takes, I get to write music. I get to write sketches. I get to write movies. It's the best job ever.

Stranger: Resistance is a symptom of the way things are Not the way things necessarily should be. Actual victory belongs to things that simply do not see failure. Let the path push you like a broken branch in a river's current.

I think it's a comedian's job to make everything funny. Nothing is off-limits.

Why does every girl in the world wanna date me? Especially right now man, especially when I'm busy!

Took the G out yo waffle, all you got left is your ego.

Don't add an eezy to my name, 'cause it has never been that'

Black men struggle with masculinity so much. The idea that we must always be strong really presses us all down - it keeps us from growing.

I keep it wrapped until i meet the right one
'Cause I ain't Mumford, I ain't trying to have sons

The worst is feeling worthless.

I have an obsession with books about kids with Asperger's syndrome.

Also, I realized a lot of kids are listening to me. Whether I want to be or not, they're looking up to me.