Colin Mochrie Famous Quotes
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I believe it was Shakespeare who said, 'All the world's a stage, and you are CRAP!'
Did you know that ... 'embargo' spelled backwards is 'o grab me
Give me liberty or give me a bran muffin!
The Hills are alive with the sound of CRAP!
Rudolf the Red-Nosed Reindeer, dead at 53. Over Barcelona today, the famed reindeer was hit by a flock of seagulls and a 747. Eyewitnesses report, that the reindeer in Spain was hit mainly by the plane.
Give me liberty or a bran muffin!
Famous Playboy Hugh Hefner managed to successfully stop an order of monks from operating a business on his property. The police forced the friars to close down their stall, which was outside the Playboy mansion where they had been selling flowers. Said one friar, well, if it was anyone else we may have gotten away from it, but, unfortunately, only Hugh can prevent florist friars.
Nine out of ten Americans believe that out of ten people, one person will always disagree with the other nine!
This just in: Beverly Hills 90210, Cleveland Browns 3.
As I get older, I'm trying to accept improvisation into my day-to-day living.
NASA sends probe to Uranus, people everywhere giggle.
Please call your second witness, and then call your mother, she worries.
The American audiences are more vocal and enthusiastic. British audiences tend to sit back a little more.
Hey, come on, I've seen younger faces on money. Money.
There are so many things I'd like to change in the industry. Everything from the reliance of style over substance to their reluctance to hire me for big budget blockbusters, but the thing I would love most would be if they understood people don't have to be Hollywood beautiful to be sexy or interesting.
I think the challenge is going out in front of a paying audience with absolutely nothing and trying to entertain them for two hours. Thankfully, I only think about that right before we go on, and then once we're out there, everything's fine.
Many people think it's in bad taste to advertise for an insane asylum ... but come on down. We're going crazy.
Let me play a man in a scene.
Why are there so many trees in the jungle?
My mother on her death bed told me, 'Where the hell did that kangaroo come from!?' - it just popped out of nowhere and punched her in the head and caused a cerebral hemorrhage, so I thought I'd move to a country where there were no kangaroos!
I'm a traveling practical joker. That's my line of work.
But you know, we have more hits than you can possibly think about. One of my personal favorite artists is the wonderful artist named Cher. And although I love much of her late stuff, her early stuff was the stuff that I really, really loved.
I have many favorite artists ... Van Gogh as one, but he didn't really sing a lot!
Hey, Ryan, if Sting retires, will he change his name to Stung?
The people who influenced me most were the people who said I would never make it. They gave me a thirst for revenge.
I was a bookworm. Every week I'd go to the library and get seven books. Remember libraries? I wonder if people still go. And I learned about everything from the library. I came from a Scottish family. Old school.
For as long as I can remember I've had memories.
We'll be back to our nature documentary, 'Baggy the Anorexic Elephant' in just a second.
Hi, well soon return you to the dyslexic production of Bitty Bitty Chang Chang ...
We want to be funny. We want to make people laugh ... We'll do whatever it takes.
The Beatles, Rolling Stones, Barbra Streisand, Bruce Springsteen, these are just some of the people who threatened to sue if we used their songs.
There's many times this year I've sat back and thought, I'm making a living from making things up. It's the only skill I have so I've been really lucky.
When you kill someone by chopping off their head, rolling 'em up in a carpet and burning it, you'd better make sure they're dead!
You know, in the 1970's, when I was in high school, I belonged to a band called the Happy Funk Band. Until an unfortunate typo caused us to be expelled from school.
Our top story tonight: Famous TV dolphin flipper was arrested today on prostitution ring charges. He allegedly was seen transporting two 16 year olds across state line for immoral porpoises.